AIBU to want to go dancing on my own

[RaveToTheGrave1]

This is very silly but I don't have people to ask

I recently went to an excellent night out with my mam (70s, 80s and her sort of stuff) and had a great time, loads of dancing and generally all round a brilliant few hours that was desperately needed

Theres another event coming up that's mostly dnb, rave etc (my sort of music) at a local nightclub and I've bit the bullet and got myself a ticket, I'm so excited, got myself a new outfit and I can't wait to just dance the night away, going on my own as I don't have friends into this sort of music, I will just go and dance not interested in talking to others etc. I used to rave loads when I was younger and I really miss it

This club previously has been known for drugs, which I'm not into at all, but it's a huge venue and always very busy so I'd expect stuff like that in most big clubs anyway

My husband (honestly lovely, never jealous) seemed a bit weirded out and insinuated I'd need to keep my drinks covered and he wasn't super happy I was going on my own

My mum said oh wow not sure if you should go on your own to that!

I would expect this if I was a fresh faced 18 year old girl but I'm bloody 33! I don't know if I'm just not perceiving danger or something but most people there are in their early twenties, I said I don't mind if my husband wants to go but he doesn't dance and I think he's probably gonna stand off to the sides like a lemon whilst I have a blast 😅

AIBU to expect people to just, let me live 😂

Honestly it is a bit unusual but I totally understand where you’re coming from. Some of my best nights out have been when I’ve been out with a friend who is happy to do her own thing for a few hours while I do mine - which is usually just dancing.

I’m a lot older than you and still go out dancing most weekends. I love house music and there’s so many amazing events nowadays.

Plenty of people go on their own but the crowd are really welcoming and inclusive. I’ve met some of my best friends through music.

Go out and enjoy - the dance floor is a happy place

lol what the fuck? As in she has her own interests and isn’t boring?

Oh don’t be ridiculous. She’s going out dancing not shagging.

Her DH is concerned about safety.

You don't sound like fun material!

What a weird thing to say, I've been happily married nearly 10 years 😂 just I love to dance and my husband has self admittedly about as much rhythm as a giraffe with three legs

That's what I figured! When I was younger everyone was really friendly and the plur movement was huge, was just really hoping it's the same way still 🩷

Cos I love the music and just cos everyone else is on drugs doesn't mean I am 😂

Plenty of people 50/60 still go out to raves - music and dancing doesn’t have an age limit.

From your post it seems like you think your husband is jealous and doesn't want you to go out, but it sounds like from what he actually said he's concerned about your safety. Which is not a misplaced concern. Your age is not going to prevent someone from trying to drug your drink. You should be able to go on your own without having to worry but that's not always the reality of the world in which we live.

OP - get yourself a cup with a lid and a straw. That’s what a lot of us do to keep our drinks safe when we’re out.

Amazon do plenty that you can customise

Nah don't really think he's jealous just he's never usually mega concerned about my safety cos he knows I can take care of myself, I just found it a little weird this was the one thing he was worried about just cos I was on my own I suppose!

I figured at least I only tend to have a couple of drinks anyway so just drink them at the bar, not carry them about and obviously not leave them anywhere should be okay 😊

That's a great idea actually, thank you!

Exactly! My mam is in her early sixties and put everyone to shame at the eighties night, she's awesome! Her music tastes unforgettable doesn't extend to what I like 😂

Going out alone dancing? Totally fine, have a great time.
Assuming you don't need to keep an eye on your phone cos you're 33 so nothing would ever happen to you? Irresponsible. Your DH is right. Stick to bottled drinks and put your finger in the whole whilst drinking or but open drinks but drink them there and then

I've been out with a friend and danced whilst she sits in the booth! It's safer that way.

I'm not saying people don't get spiked, but being in the vicinity of class As doesn't mean everyone is roaming around looking for drinks to tip MDMA into. I imagine they want their drugs to themselves!

I'm sure you'll be fine. I've been to events on my own a bunch. I've never had anything other than a good time.

It's fine. You'll be there to dance, not to take drugs or socialise or impress anyone. It's not like you can really get the same atmosphere/activity at home. And I agree with you on not dragging along someone who won't enjoy it just for the sake of appearances; if you dance and he doesn't you won't be "together" for much of the time anyway.

He's right about the drinks, though - watch them being opened/mixed and don't let them out of your sight. People that drug drinks probably do disproportionately prey on women on their own, unfortunately. Apart from exercising appropriate caution, though, I'd ignore the critics and have a great time!

Thank you! I think he'll feel an absolute melon just sort of standing there, he does like the music but he's very stoic and quiet which is the opposite of me 😂

I'm definitely going to bring my own sealable cup like previous poster said, thank you everyone really put my mind at ease 🩷

I figured if people have spent all their dosh on whatever they're taking they're gonna mostly want to keep it to themselves 😂

Anyone with drugs will be taking them, not putting them in your drinks! I still go to dnb raves frequently (& am older than you!). You'll have a great time and people will be super friendly- if you actually want to speak to anyone. Have fun!

They're both being ridiculous, you're a grown woman! Go, and have a great time!