We’re supposed to be visiting my husband’s family tomorrow. Originally it was in the morning but there has been a misunderstanding and the host wants everyone to come in the mid afternoon onwards. They live an hour away and we have a one month old. There will be nowhere for me to comfortably breastfeed, two very reactive/vicious dogs that one relative is bringing along- one bit my husband’s leg last year under the table! Some of them also smoke and I can’t be sure they’ll do this outside after a previous year when they kind of stood in the open doorway, half in half out. Equally they all want to see the baby (but have met baby before). We frequently see and are close to the hosts but not the other relatives going, maybe see them once or twice a year.
AIBU to really not want to go and suggest he goes alone? It’s longer than I’d like baby to spend in the car seat. My husband says we should maybe compromise and meet them for a walk in the morning but it’s still a long way to travel, I feel like it would be fairer for them to meet us somewhere halfway in between.
One of my relatives who we are all very close to is hosting much nearer by and I would be much more comfortable there. Less than 10 minute drive, private space to feed (but would be welcome to feed in front of others there and nobody would judge) and it will generally be much more relaxed for me
DH says it’s fine if I don’t want to go, he will just explain it’s too late in the day with the baby. However, I feel bad to DH as if the boot was on the other foot I’d be hurt if he didn’t want to see my family.
I had an idea that I could suggest he could go on his own- would that be fine or do I look like hard work?