Accidentally scratched a car - help?

[Idkw2d]

Hi Mumsnetters and a Merry Christmas to you all,

I am a new driver and have got myself in a situation.

As I was leaving an Asda car park this morning with my child, I managed to reverse too far back and scraped the side of someone’s very big car. I say big because it didn’t look like a scruffy runaround car, it was a big shiny car.

I am usually incredibly careful and slow, especially as I only passed my test in January this year. I am insured as an additional driver on my husband’s car and it’s just a small scruffy car that is easy to drive.

I have managed perfectly fine in this car park for years but due to a number of factors, I was somewhat caught off guard and managed to reverse too far (a driver was zooming up onto my right while another came right up to my backside). The car I scratched was sticking out of its parking slot by a fair margin, which is why I didn’t expect or realise what I’d done until it was too late :(

The bottom of the back of the car had visible marks where some black paint had come off and there was one very very very tiny scratch on the body. A few bystanders said “it doesn’t look too bad at all” and I took photos.

I waited for the owners to show up, told them what happened and gave my name, number, reg and home address. They said they would get a quote and get back to me, but if I didn’t want to pay then we could go through insurance. They said it could be around £200-300 to “paint over the panel”. said as it was my fault I was more than happy to compensate them. They haven’t gotten in touch yet so I’m still waiting.

Anyway, this is my first experience of anything like this and I have been a mess. I’m embarrassed to say I have cried over this multiple times today. I feel stupid for getting into a situation like this but even more stupid for now having to fork up what could be potentially a few hundred pounds.

Long story short, I had some questions:

1. If they ask me to pay, say, £300 and I agree, can they turn around and claim through insurance as well? I am a ‘new’ driver and worried about how this could affect my status.

2. Should insurance be informed regardless? I’ve heard conflicting info and don’t want to get in trouble.

3. Did I deal with this right? Some people have said I shouldn’t have given my home address.

4. Any advice or words of support? I feel so disappointed in myself today and am worried the owners will take advantage of the situation and charge me extra. I’ve heard and seen so many scams where people are forced to fork out exaggerated amounts for minor damage.

5. I’m also annoyed because they were parked in a Child & Parent spot when they clearly didn’t have any with them! Just makes it sting a little more lol.

Just to give some context, here’s an image of the damage:

I have outlined the scuffs with a thin green line, anyone see it properly? That is the damage. There are no dents, just this paint being scuffed off.

Sorry here is the image >

lol no not wanting people to feel sorry for me, was just expressing how I felt about the situation! It was definitely a light touch as I didn’t leave a single dent, just the paint which scuffed off. But still, I am in a situation of my own doing and am just looking for the best way to resolve it 🙏🏻

I'd inform insurance and go through them, I had a similar experience when a new driver and the other party said they would just contact me with quote but they didn't and went to their insurance and my insurance called me and gave me a very stern telling off for not calling them and reporting it

You ANBU to be a bit shaken - it is upsetting, however it seems they were very reasonable after you damaged their car, nobody was hurt, I dont think it warrants repeated crying. I would think you won't hear from them for a few days due to the time of year. If you can afford to pay rather than go through insurance I would ...

I was mostly crying just because it’s been a really horrible overwhelming tough week and this was the last straw :( Of course in the grand scheme of things this could have been so much worse so I understand that perspective x

Perspective is everything, but we've all been there, where something is just the final straw! Hope you are feeling calmer about it now & enjoy your Christmas! x

How much space do your supermarket places have behind them. You can barely walk between cars in mine never mind open the boot and somehow ferry the shopping from the trolley between two cars

How is that hard to Imagine?

Please tell insurers - if this ever comes up it will effect your husbands insurance (invalidating) it and if they decide to do the claim through there insurance they will know anyway and it will impact

cash in hand and not involving insurance was a lot easier before everything was online and in databases

same is true if you decide to fix something without telling insurance it could render it invalid

I agree with this. I’ve done it before and offered to pay them directly. And vice versa.

was somewhat caught off guard and managed to reverse too far (a driver was zooming up onto my right while another came right up to my backside). The car I scratched was sticking out of its parking slot by a fair margin,

With respect, absolutely none of this matters, I say this not to be mean but as a driver you need to know when things are your fault.

That being said, I promise you this will be absolutely fine, go through insurance and let them handle it- its why they're there

Same. I've seen some v overweight people struggle but otherwise can't see the issue. Tbh I mainly dump shopping on the front seat as only get 4 bags max

5 stars for hanging about to take responsibility ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️. 100% your fault and how they were parked is irrelevant. Hopefully not a mistake you'll make again.

Legally your contract with your insurer is you must tell them, even if you don't make a claim, and it will bump up your premiums.

In real life many people agree to compensate without involving insurance.

The risk you take doing it without insurance is you are putting a lot of trust in a stranger not to bump the cost up, change their mind, or take cash from you and still go through insurance and your insurance will not be interested in your previous agreement with them.

I only shop in lidl at 8am on a say morning so spose I don't have an issue for that reason. And mainly put shopping on passenger seat/floor well hence put the trolley next to the front of the car or to the side

I did similar op many moons ago. I had just started driving and scraped a car side in the lidl carpark. I was a week postpartum and not myself. It was missing down with rain and I needed to get back for school pick up. I waited for about half an hour. Then decided to go into the supermarket to ask someone to put a message on the annoyed speakers. I got 4 steps away from my car and a lady was screaming at me not to disappear..... I wasn't love. My ars parked and I have been waiting half an hour and the rain will ruin any letter. She wouldn't let me go into the supermarket. She was horrible. Anyways whilst this was going on the owner came out and started shouting at me too. Saying it was his late dad's car. Which I understand but not really the point! He kept huffing and puffing. Made me feel like I killed someone. Eventually his wife came out told him to shut up and finally.let me exchange details.

Imo. Always go through Insurance because I wouldn't trust others not to take the cash and go through insurance too!

This happened to me recently. I'd say the damage was very slightly more than yours (so paint stripped down and I could see another colour in places ). They got a quote for less than £400 which we were happy to pay. So far it's been a few weeks and I don't think they've reported to insurance.

I reported an accident to my insurance that was non claim. I skidded into the back of my neighbour in the snow. Her car was fine my car had a broken headlight. I reported it just in case. It stayed on file for five months (time limit to make a claim?) then dropped off didn’t affect the premium.

Don't cry, it really isn't worth getting upset about. They're not upset because you'll fix it.

If you pay, they can later go through insurance and you pay twice. However, I absolutely wouldn't go through insurance for this unless it's a company car etc and you're kind of forced to. They're likely reasonable people and going through insurance will cost them too. It is the "correct" thing to do but the cost via insurance will be nothing less than extortionate and cost you and them via increased premiums.

I used to work in claims.

It sort of depends on your boot though. I need a good couple of foot clearance to open mine. I do reverse park automatically and then wander back with a trolley and think bollocks. I tend to just stick it in the middle as doors slide rather than open outwards

I scraped someone's car a week after passing my test too. I obviously didn't have enough room for my manoeuvre so I don't know what I was thinking!

It's really common for new drivers to have a few bumps. That's part of the reason why new drivers tend to have bangers. Please don't beat yourself up about it.

Someone hit us in similar circumstances and after checking the damage was cosmetic we didn’t pursue it either. They were apologetic at the scene and it felt almost uncharitable to take it further.

We saw them several months later and said an awkward “Hello” - made even more so when we realised where we knew each other from!