So very many threads could be simply answered with

[leafybrew]

You're stupid OP - HTH

I do know this is a pretty awful thing to think and extremely negative but I will quite often think it and have a little giggle to myself.

It isn't always the OP - it can be applied to many other posters

NB post menopausal here and the filters came off a while ago.

6 Could it be early onset dementia?
7 Are you menopausal?
8 Are you perimenopausal?
9 Could you be neurodivergent?
10 A&E now!
11 Log it with 101.

It's palaver. No wonder the tories decided to fixate on spelling and grammar!!

The ones that irritate me start with 'Am I the only one who..' 'Does anyone else think...'

There are over 8 billion people on the planet. Yeah, Susan, it is very likely you are the only one who finds cling film annoying.

I find a lot fall into the following categories:

Your DH doesn’t like you - leave
You don’t like your DH - leave
Stop being so petty
Blended families don’t work
I don’t care if it’s a fucking line
Your boss wants you out

I was convinced it meant hit the highway🙈

The man you have been dating for all of 5 mins and is treating you badly is not your DP he’s just some random you’re having sex with. Just get rid.

Notwithstanding the above, the man in every scenario is the one in the wrong, even if the OP sounds completely unhinged posters will always find a way to blame the man.
Ditto for MIL’s.

Yes the obvious man-haters on a mission to destroy every man on the planet serve no benefit to the OPs asking for practical advice. They also drown out and drive off the people trying to genuinely help with sane and balanced advice.

Fine. Use monjaro if you wish, but for the love of god stop spamming the boards (have to say this one has improved recently).

If you're under 30 you probably don't need a skincare regime anyway.

Yes, you can be sacked for doing fuckall when you are meant to be working from home.

A hell of a lot of subjects on mumsnet can be explained away with the term ‘confirmation bias’. Someone says that it’s always men, women, cats dogs that always do whatever it is they are complaining about, it’s usually confirmation bias.

Another genre of braindead pick-me threads I absolutely cannot stand are ones with "Does anyone have this virus" or "Is there some type of virus going around?" and the post invariably contains a random list of common symptoms like had a sore throat on Thurs followed by fever followed by diarrhoea and then fever for 2 hours on Tues but it's not covid, what could it be? And the answers are all people confirming to OP that they have exactly the same thing and it must be some super mystery new virus that everyone is coming down with.

If you ask tens of thousands of people at any given time if they have symptoms, of course you're going to find a fucking echo chamber of a few who have exactly the same combination of respiratory or gastro symptoms as you. Why can't people accept the fact that there are ALWAYS viruses at any given time and they need the reassurance of strangers that "there's indeed something going around" to make themselves feel special.

Slightly different thing but it really annoys me when people start a thread with: "my friend (let's call her sally) and my bf (let's call him John) "

I always think: how about we don't call him anything and you just get on with it!

Or when they say I've name changed because it's outing and I know people on here. Surely that makes it more outing!

It's been years since I heard 'taradiddle'! Very expressive.

Personally I rather like 'baloney' and 'tommyrot' - words that frequently pop into my head when I'm browsing Mumsnet.

Piffle is a good one too. I used 'load of old toot' on a thread yesterday (describing the plot of Death in Paradise, but could also apply to many MN threads).

You are Alan Sugar and I claim my £5.😃

Point taken, but you can work on yourself and develop assertiveness. The first time you find your voice it's really hard but it gets progressively easier and feels less confrontational the more you do it.

That was exactly what I was going to say...why agree in the first place to split every thing 50/50...what sort of person thinks it's fair that "dh" earn a £150k a year and you earn £15k and pay for the kids?

You're fired!

[as close as I've ever been to The Apprentice, as it happens]

"Tell them directly."

"Put your foot down."

"Use your common sense."

Mine too!

Piffle is also excellent. Doesn't Withnail use it, or am I misremembering?

No, it's twaddle. Also good.

Something that's sadly lacking in a lot of people. They don't use their brain.

I get somewhat irked by posters enquiring if they are being unreasonable only to get distinctly huffy when responses indicate that, yes, they are being unreasonable. If you don't think you are being unreasonable, what are you asking for? What they want is everybody to tell them they are right. I suppose it isn't their fault there isn't a, 'Agree with me and heap platitudes upon my head' thread title.

Lol at a thread theorising that most AIBU could be answered by saying the op is stupid......... then becoming a thread of people that cannot spell palava. 😂

IQ varies so of course there will be stupid posts. I also don't think anyone is immune from saying something a bit stupid, we can't all know everything.

You sound a bit daft yourself though, OP, with your Beavis and Butthead style 'little giggle' at your imagined smart response.

I found myself thinking this myself a few days ago. I, too, am post-menopausal.

Then I remind myself that, when I was in my 20s and 30s, I was stupid, too. I got wiser with age. I like to think the MN pool help.provide a shortcut from stupid. Ibwish I had had MN when my DCs, SDCs, ex and employer were giving me grief.