To ask for help with paying off debt?

[IcyPlumCrab]

I have a credit card with a £2,300 limit and have about £30 left on it. I have got it up to a couple of hundred but the interest rates are high and I've found myself needing to dip into it due to cost of living.

Other than that I don't have much, I have a £400 overdraft but I'm not worried about that, and a credit card with a £200 limit but it's 0.
However the first credit card keeps me awake at night. I know people have much worse but it honestly makes me feel ashamed and fret. Currently have no savings as I recently bought a flat, so anything I did have went into that.

I've cancelled my pension contributions and waiting on a refund (civil service), but it's just taking forever to hear anything. However when I get that back it'll be around £1000 which will really help.
Without my pension I take home around £2060 net per month and I'm currently looking for a second job.

My mortgage is £440 a month.
Just cancelled my tv licence and gym membership which in total will save me £60.
Electricity is only about £35 a month.
Gas £35 a month atm.
Water haven't been billed yet but hopefully no more than £25 a month.
Council tax is £189 a month until March :(
Internet £24 a month.
Phone including handset £34 a month.
Pet insurance and monthly vet health care plan £32 (i have a cat)
As of March will be paying £120 service charge/ground rent a month.

There always seems to be something coming up like the dentist, household things etc. I think it's the credit card that's killing me, even if I pay £100, £50 is charged in interest.
I have a holiday planned to see a relative this month and in total that's set me back around £400, but that's not something I do very often.
Everything left good on food, transport (public transport, don't have a car), pet food, toiletries etc.
All my clothes and shoes are second hand.

The cat doesn't cost me much at all to look after, I do have the single person CT discount but because of the way the dates fell i have to pay more until April, then it'll go to the normal rate.

For the credit card pay a bit over the minimum each month. Then stick to the amount. For example, if it’s £199 then pay £210. The extra will make a dent and each month you pay £210 it will chip away the debt. Usually paying the minimum it’s almost nothing because of the interest.

When you go out, or to work, take a snack and water/tea/coffee rather than buying food and drink out.

This. Transfer the balance to 0%.

You can be entertained at home for free by signing up with various streaming providers on a free week trial - MUBI, Apple TV+, Paramount +, BFI player and maybe others I don’t know of. But you have to remember to cancel your subscription before the end of the trial.

Have just remembered a programme I saw once about a very successful business woman ( can’t remember who). She had started life quite poor, but had set herself high targets and ambitions. One thing she did was to give herself a daily allowance to cover incidental expenses. She had this in cash , no card, and if there was anything left over at the end of the day,either a few pounds or even a few pence, she would empty her wallet and put that money straight into a savings pot which she would eventually bank but not otherwise touch. I don’t think the amount mattered so much as the mindfulness of what she was spending.

Bank accounts like Monzo or hyperjar let you have 'pots' so you can make a budget for groceries, toiletries, travel costs, socialising, whatever. You also might get some money by changing bank.

I agree don't cancel your pension. Its a great scheme yes. And actually i don't think it makes enough difference to bother with the effort of cancelling it as SCcs or whatever they are called now are slow.

When you've cleared the card you need to save an emergency fund. Look at someone like Dave Ramsey, UK version.

The little things all add up.

I started living alone this year and have had to learn to be really strict with myself. I have a "pot" for all the essentials - food, cat etc and separate the rest for fun things.

I do 2 bigger online shops a month and one smaller Aldi shop and make that last all month. I meal prep my work food and never buy lunch out. If I'm bored at the end of the month when money is tight I invite friends round rather than going out.

It's all a learning curve but you'll get there!

It's madness to opt out of the civil service pension scheme, you've literally thrown away £ here.

You are living the lifestyle of someone else.

If you were to just not go out for a month or two, you could completely pay that credit card off!!

Imagine yourself in March or April with no credit card debt at all.

But if all the terrible financial decisions you’ve made , cancelling your civil service pension is the absolute worst.

please don’t do this. Not only are you robbing yourself of future income but you risk the terms and conditions being changed .

Given she's in the civil service, promotion? Might take a while depending on the department but there is usually some movement.

someone mentioned council tax over 12 months rather than 10 - could that mean if you haven't arranged that already, you have two months coming up with no council tax.
your mobile is expensive - how much longer is on the contract? Cancel as soon as it finishes and get a sim only deal - typically around £6 for unlimited calls and texts (ID, gifgaff, Lebara)
if you ever need to replace the handset. a motorola smartphone is around £70.

Do not leave the civil service pension scheme to pay a £2k credit card debt. That is one of the worse financial decisions you will ever make.

The fact that you're single is the red herring in your situation - it's that you've chosen to live alone and you just don't have the income to comfortably afford the reality of what living alone means in this day and age.

Go monthly to your local pound shop to bulk buy cleaning supplies loo roll etc

Your debt is manageable. Don't beat yourself up. (I ended up in around £20,000 of debt). Your mortgage and outgoings are pretty low and it sounds like it's all the 'little bits' that you are spending.
Definitely check out moneysavingexpert.
What about having a couple of 'no spend days' a week. Give yourself a weekly budget and use cash. Write down everything you spend and if it means you forego your cup of coffee out for a while, then you'll have to make the sacrifice.
You could be out of debt in a few months if you make a few small changes now.

Do you have space to rent a room out? You can often find people working away who want digs Monday to Friday will pay decent money but you hardly see them. A few months of doing that would pay off the debt and start your savings.

I signed up for Clearscore, they have a really good app that shows where you could improve to qualify for those 0% balance transfer cards.

I would say the first step is making sure you're not going further into debt, it sounds like you have that covered. If you could then get a 0% card over 24 months say it would cost £100 a month to pay off the debt and that would be easier for you.

It’s clear you’re spending it on things that aren’t essentials eg holidays or going out. You mentioned discounted cinema tickets. Not going for the cinema is free!! And cheaper than discounted tickets.

i think from the outside it’s easy to pick holes in your posts (sorry!) and see where you are going wrong

@IcyPlumCrab what kind of things do you currently do on dates? What’s your idea of fun?

Maybe you and your dp could make a list of ideas? things that keep the fun but are cheaper/free?

So you do free or cheap stuff much of the time and make meals out and other expensive stuff occasional treats.

Museums, parks, country walks, bike rides, picnics, cooking at home together, movie night at home, board games, DIY together, inviting friends over for a pot luck supper, quiz or games nights with friends at home. All low spend activities.

Then limit expensive treats, meal out once a month, another paid date once a month. They feel more special this way, and you get to see how genuinely compatible you are. If your boyfriend won't work with you on this then perhaps he isn't the one.

Is your boyfriend pressuring you to do 'interesting' things like expensive meals, dates, activities, get takeaways and things like that?

Sometimes, if somebody is fine for money themselves (such as if they still live with their Mum for £30 a week), they'll be more demanding or expect more from somebody they think has loads of money, either because it's more than they have or because they're fine and can't imagine somebody else struggling.

He might be simply oblivious to it costing hundreds a month - or he knows and doesn't care because he wants the lifestyle. Only you will know the truth on which it is.

Why would you cancel your pension contributions?! You're throwing away free money (your employers contributions) that will be a lifeline in later life!

Tbh I just accept life has to be a bit boring until the debt is cleared as once you're paying less in interest it'll give you more spare

Rejoin the pension asap as that's a really unwise move

Document every single spend as clearly you have a lot unaccounted for. Your partner should be sharing costs if going out together

Don't save anything until your debt is gone, it's totally false economy. By clearing the debt quicker you'll pay far less interest than what savings would earn you. If u needed emergency money you can just put it back on the card you've just made more space on by putting money towards earlier

Clear whatever has the highest interest rates first whether that be the overdraft or the card

If you are near the end of your 'phone contract, check out sim only deals.

No restart the pension now.

Stopping the pension will cost you far more than a few extra months of debt.