AIBU for swerving changed dinner plans?

[AConcernedCitizen]

Partner asked me a few days ago if I'd like to go to their mum's for a takeaway on Sunday (tonight). I said yes. Plan was to have a nice chilled day, quick bit of shopping in town, then head over for a curry early evening.

Yesterday partner told me that SIL/BIL and young nephews (1&2), plus DM's partner would also be going.

Earlier today, partner got off the phone and walked in to tell me that we'd have to leave in an hour, as we'd been asked to pick up some ingredients and get to their DM's house for 3pm, as they were doing a Sunday roast.

I said no...I was happy with a takeaway with just three three of us later on, but really didn't fancy rushing out for a big family Sunday dinner. Partner is a bit miffed that I haven't gone with them.

Bit of context - I've just got back from a trip to the US and am badly jetlagged. I didn't sleep last night, but napped from 8am-1pm.

SIL/BIL went to a party last night and BIL was too ill to go to the dinner today. SIL hungover so we would have had to look after the kids.

We're all having Christmas/boxing day together.

I'm currently sat under a blanket with a takeaway trying to figure out if I've been unreasonable or not, or if I'm overthinking this entirely due to lack of sleep!

AIBU to have said no to the changed plans?

A takeaway for the three of you in the evening is very different from a roast dinner at three. It's just me, but just because I accept one invitation doesn't mean I'm happy for it to change completely, if you feel the same then stay at home. It's not like you won't see them at Christmas

But surely eating earlier would have been better for you so you don't have to cook and can get home early which will get your sleeping pattern back to normal? I would think you were very rude for not turning up at all if you didn't have anything else already planned.

Could be argued changing the plan at the last minute was rude. Especially if it wasn’t discussed. Sunday roast in the afternoon is very different to takeaway in the evening. I couldn’t have accommodated that change as too busy with other things and consequently wouldn’t have gone. Sounds like OP ring fences it for jet lag recovery

Why have a roast today? Take away sounds perfect for today, it’ll be roast dinner on Wednesday anyway. As much as I love a roast, once a week is enough.

Going from take away to cooking and watching the In-laws kids because THEY chose to drink is a big ask. Those are THEIR kids and THEIR responsiblity You aren't obligated because they made stupid choices.Besides,they chose to invite themselves over last minute and took for granted that others would just jump in and take care of THEIR kids. On top of that people expect you after a long flight to be excited to go cook after being invited for takeaway? Id cancel too. COUNT ME OUT