To think this was really rude

[Sprogonthetyne]

Met at a soft play with DH & I, our DC, FIL, BIL & his DC. The time there was fine and we agreed to take the DC to macdonalds afterwards.

When we got to the macdonalds I had to call in a shop with DD, so sent DH & DS ahead with everyone else to order. When I got there FIL was sat on a table for 4, with the 3 DC, while DH and BIL were ordering for the respective families. BIL got back with their food first and managed to squeeze in but this left no room at the table for our family. Before they started eating I pointed out several larger tables near by and asked if they would move so we can all sit together, but they said 'it's fine', leaving us to either pull up stools and eat off our knees, or go sit separately.

We decided to move to a nearby large table, as the DC would probably have dropped their food if they had to eat off their knees, and once again asked them to join us, and they just ignored the question.

I feel arranging to go eat together, then not sitting together was really rude and feel kind of snubbed, as they deliberately chose a table that would not fit us and refused to move. DH wants to defend his family and says no offence was meant and I'm reading to much into it. Who is BU?

Meh, I would not be bothered as long as I had a table to eat at tbh.

No, thats really rude and weird.
I would assume there is some backstory there or the day before hand wasn't as trouble free as you think.

Possible just me then. Does it make a difference that this is the only time over Christmas we will see them (their choice) and we went out of our way to fit into what they wanted to do and the timings that work for them?

If it was a proper meal I would see your point but is McDonald’s, it wouldn’t bother me at all.

Rude and odd.

It wasn't the day before, we met at the soft play at 12 and went straight from there to macdonalds at 2. Absolutely no drama other then the DC being a bit hungry and moany by 2 (I had been intending to eat at soft play but waiting as they wanted maccies and thought it would be nice to do it together)

I wouldn't be overly bothered. It's a quick fast food meal, not a sit down pub style/resteraunt dinner.

Is McDonald's like eating at a cafeteria. I wouldn't expect a conversational dining experience.

It's a bit odd of them, but also it's Maccies so hardly the end of the world

Far enough, consensus seems to be its fine to sit separately at macdonalds. Possibly I am reading to much into it as we've being asking to spend Christmas together for the last few year but the quick soft play & macdonalds is all they were willing/ able to do with our family over the festive period.

I'd find that really odd if a bigger table was available.

We ended up sat at a half empty table for 10, as I thought they'd join us, but they decided to stay on the tiny table.

It's only MaccyD's, you eat and move on. You don't chat, socialise, linger etc. I probably wouldn't have moved mid meal, with all the palava that entails either.

It wasn't mid-meal, it was before the people who had gone to order had got back with the food.

I think it's weird not to choose a table the right size for the number of people in your party when there are the right size tables available. I suppose your DH is right they might not be meaning any offence though. They might just be a bit thoughtless.

That is weird and rude. So they could have moved so you all sat together but didn’t ? Just odd…

yeah it seems weird to me. fine to sit apart if the only option was 2 small tables, but if there was a choice between 1 small table that could only fit half your party and 1 table that could fit everyone, it's very odd to pick the former, mcdonalds or not.

It's also very rude to 'I'm all right Jack' plonk yourself down on a table that doesn't have enough seats for the people who are buying and bringing your food to you to sit at!

Apart from anything else it's selfish, as it would have meant two tables were tied up with your family, with one of them half empty. Whereas if you'd all sat together the small table would have been available for other people to use.

Why can’t your partners parents see you over Christmas apart from McDonald’s? I am guessing that has really upset you. Maybe you have to understand that they don’t want to maybe I think it probably was rude and it just shows that you two are wanting to entertain them possibly they’re not that bothered. Maybe I think you need a reflection of that.

I think that was very impolite and thoughtless. However, for the sake of interfamilial relationships, I would let it pass.

That's weird.

The restaurant is irrelevant.
They should have all sat with you, you all had plans to eat out together..

It’s McDonald’s not fine dining. Not worth getting in a lather about.

I think that's the curx of it, I really want to DC to have a strong grandparent relationship but PIL just don't seem that bothered, and that's what hurts more then who sat where. Just made it feel like they already didn't have much time for us then couldn't get away from us fast enough.

I might find it slightly odd, but maybe that was the only table actually available when they got there. You arrived a bit later and others had been freed up.

It wouldn't bother me at all though and I wouldn't give enough of a shit about it to keep going over it now. It wasn't rude at all.

I wouldn't like it. It happened to me when I went to a family event staying over at a hotel and I thought it was weird. Ended up with three families sitting at different tables and DH and I sitting on our own, when we could've all sat at a big table.