First post. All opinions gratefully received. Where to start! I have a cousin (Claire) who has unfortunately, found herself alone and in ill health. Claire’s mum and dad emigrated to Canada before I was born and had 2 children (my cousins, Claire and her sister Christine). They are 10+ years older than me, I rarely saw them except for visits to UK every 2/3 years. We didn’t really keep in touch, in the days before e-mail/skype etc. They did however, send gifts at Christmas (gifts treasured by me as money was tight for my family). Claire moved back to the UK some time ago and married. I visited, usually at Christmas time (she never visited me) and I would see her at the rare family functions eg funeral etc. Claire did not work and lived off benefits since returning to the UK. Her husband died and she is alone and in ill health (she mentioned having carers in her home but did not go into any other detail). She recently asked me if she can put me down as her next of kin. Christine, is alive and still living in Canada. I innocently questioned this request as surely Christine is her next of kin. I did offer to be her ‘in case of emergency’. I now feel terrible as I think I am all she has. I work, have my own family and children and live a few hours drive from Claire. Am I a terrible person for not wanting this burden?