3 of us- good friends for many years, lets say F1, F2 and myself- approaching middle age, we all have done fairly well in terms of careers. Kids are adults, at Uni/ otherwise settled, just DHs at home now.
My friend F1 gets job offer abroad- about an hour's flight from home- good money, good weather- but primarily money- really really good offer. Her DH doesn't want her to go as he feels it will 'disrupt the family'. She is someone who has always moved around the country due to her DH job, and always put herself last due to family reasons, changed jobs as per needs of DH- better job for DH, good schools for kids etc etc. Now she feels its 'her time', she has done her bit, kids are grown up and fairly settled....and wants to move away, even if it means living separately from DH (she rather welcomes that!) because she can finally focus on herself and her career and make her own money, as she truly deserves. Her DH not keen to move himself as he is very well settled where he is.
I am all for it- encouraging her to take up this job offer because I know she will really thrive there and it is something she has been wanting to for a long time, but always pushed it down due to 'family needs'; F2 telling her its not right- she should stay with her DH as his job is settled where they are, he earns good money anyway, they have a big house, friends around etc etc. If she does move, it will mean setting up life all over again for her...but she is more than up for the challenge.
AIBU to encourage her? I can sense this is what she wants as well and I sincerely believe she should not compromise at this stage of her life...