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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that you don't change your baby's nappy in the middle of a coffee shop?

44 replies

Anonymous2003 · 18/12/2024 21:02

I was in a coffee shop today and there was a family with two babies sitting a couple tables up from us. I looked over and I saw the father changing the baby's nappy on the seat (the soft seat side of the table, not on a hard chair). I know it wasn't on the table or anything and I think it was only a wet nappy but AIBU to think that was a bit odd... I wasn't in the toilets so not certain if there was a baby changing mat in there.

OP posts:
Original poster
Anonymous2003 · 18/12/2024 21:15

Had to repost this as previous thread didn't have a poll

OP posts:
Raindropskeepfallinonmyhead · 18/12/2024 21:15

Yep it's rank.

JustJoinedRightNow · 18/12/2024 21:16

That's so gross

GCAcademic · 18/12/2024 21:16

That’s disgusting.

stichguru · 18/12/2024 21:16

That is gross. Really unhygienic.

Einaldilastcup · 18/12/2024 21:17

Yep.

Sheaintheavyshesmymother · 18/12/2024 21:18

I dunno. Never did it myself but it wouldn’t bother me with a small baby and just pee 🤷‍♀️

Livinginadream · 18/12/2024 21:18

Not very nice but I would guess it was because the male toilets didn't have a baby changing area...which is obviously ridiculous. Did he use a changing matt?

CHEESEY13 · 18/12/2024 21:18

What?!

DemonicCaveMaggot · 18/12/2024 21:19

There is someone out there who thinks you are unreasonable and that is because they are rank.

I did read one thread where a poster claimed it was OK for a four year old to pee up the OP's fence because it was 'angel wee'. Some people have no idea of hygiene or germs.

Original poster
Anonymous2003 · 18/12/2024 21:20

Livinginadream · 18/12/2024 21:18

Not very nice but I would guess it was because the male toilets didn't have a baby changing area...which is obviously ridiculous. Did he use a changing matt?

There was only one disabled toilet, not segregated into male and female. He didn't use a mat.

OP posts:
Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 18/12/2024 21:20

Bloody disgusting.
I think some people are so stuck in some sort of baby bubble that they lose the ability to step outside their own situation and consider whether their actions are actually appropriate.

DinosaurMunch · 18/12/2024 21:20

Grim. Take your own baby changing mat don't use a chair in a cafe!

XenoBitch · 18/12/2024 21:30

I have seen this happen a few times. it is vile, and shows a total disregard to the other people in the cafe.

Barneysmomma · 18/12/2024 22:37

A colleague on maternity leave popped into work & proceeded to change her child's nappy on a chair in the staff room full of her colleagues eating lunch! Gross in my opinion.

Healingsfall · 18/12/2024 22:41

When mine were little I used to meet a friend at a cafe with a soft play area. My friend used to whip the travel potty out in the middle of the cafe when her dd was potty training. The cafe staff told her eventually that she needed to do that in the toilets, not in the eating area. I was mortified but my friend didn't care. She'd whip that travel potty out anywhere, even in the street!

Minimili · 18/12/2024 22:49

I worked as restaurant manager in a upmarket Thai restaurant not really catered for children.

The tables were close together, traditional dishes with no chips or kids menu, no high chairs and it was beautifully decorated with lots of decorative items.

So many people came with toddlers who didn’t eat the food, ran round and were bored rigid. The worst thing though was the nappy changes as there was no baby change facilities.

In the few years I worked there i had to ask people on multiple occasions not to change nappies at the table. I used to find used nappies just dumped all over the restaurant.

The staff used to get so upset and it was so unhygienic, I don’t know what goes through peoples heads!

RabbitsEatPancakes · 18/12/2024 22:52

Absolutely foul and he clearly didn't wash his hands afterwards. I'd have asked staff to tell him to use the bathroom. Surely it could effect their hygiene rating if theyre allowing that where everyone is eating.

Original poster
Anonymous2003 · 18/12/2024 23:44

@Healingsfall god that is mental. I would've been absolutely mortified too.

OP posts:
Original poster
Anonymous2003 · 18/12/2024 23:45

@Minimili there's plenty of restaurants that cater for children, are some parents that selfish they don't realise that some people just want to have a nice meal out without listening to screaming toddlers

OP posts:
Itsoneofthose · 18/12/2024 23:48

I understand why this has divided people but the toilets and baby change in large chain coffee shops are generally absolutely disgusting & filthy. Maybe people wouldn’t do this if they were a bit cleaner.

Simonjt · 18/12/2024 23:49

RabbitsEatPancakes · 18/12/2024 22:52

Absolutely foul and he clearly didn't wash his hands afterwards. I'd have asked staff to tell him to use the bathroom. Surely it could effect their hygiene rating if theyre allowing that where everyone is eating.

Edited

The people who think its okay to change a nappy in public are likely the same people who don’t wash their hands after using the toilet.

Mylovelygreendress · 18/12/2024 23:52

I was in a cafe recently where someone produced a potty and plonked their child on it. The manager rushed over to speak to the parent but she didn’t think it should be an issue !

TY78910 · 18/12/2024 23:52

Never mind gross, I would never ever open up my DCs nappy for the world to see their privates. You don't know what wronguns are watching!!

Elizo · 18/12/2024 23:53

Anonymous2003 · 18/12/2024 21:02

I was in a coffee shop today and there was a family with two babies sitting a couple tables up from us. I looked over and I saw the father changing the baby's nappy on the seat (the soft seat side of the table, not on a hard chair). I know it wasn't on the table or anything and I think it was only a wet nappy but AIBU to think that was a bit odd... I wasn't in the toilets so not certain if there was a baby changing mat in there.

Toilet definitely better