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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How do you really feel about Christmas this year?

148 replies

TwinkleLights24 · 18/12/2024 20:02

Are you excited? Feeling meh? Dreading it?

As we are only one week away I was wondering how others feel about Christmas this year.

I’m quite sad to say that it doesn’t feel like Christmas to me. I’ve spoken to people in real life and we all seem to be going through the motions, I can’t help but think there’s so many other things going on and Christmas is an inconvenience.
I’m sure Christmas Day will be enjoyable but as I get older I think about those who are lonely or having a difficult time. I read so many stories on MN from others having a tough time, many of us feel lonely or are unwell and yet Christmas is still happening regardless.

There seems to be very little festive atmosphere around this year. Am I alone in thinking this way and you’re super excited?

OP posts:
MrsWinslowsSoothingSyrup · 18/12/2024 21:14

A bit sad to be honest.

Worried about my PIL's deteriorating quality of life, the stress my own parents are under, bereavements have hit all our young children hard. Missing my partner who died 2 years ago even though we were separated, my son's dad.

So it's quite sad really. Trying to keep cosy and support everyone.

I love Christmas, but memories haunt.

Upstartled · 18/12/2024 21:14

I'm really looking forward to it. These last couple of months have been incredibly busy and I can't wait to spend a good amount of time with DH and the kids and catch up with all the wider family.

LeaveALittleNote · 18/12/2024 21:15

I’m finding it hard this year due to bereavement and ill health. We’ve decided to only celebrate it minimally this year (cards only - no decorations or tree, no special food, no gifts). Goodness me, it feels so liberating. With the money we saved we booked ourselves a holiday in the warmth.

Maybe I’ll do Christmas again in the future, but I’d like to tone it right down from now on. I don’t enjoy the commercialism at this time of year, and we’d prefer a much more simple, more traditional Christmas from now on.

AChickenPooAndABiscuit · 18/12/2024 21:15

PollyCreo · 18/12/2024 21:10

Aww thank you 🥰 Last Christmas wasn't a whole lot of laughs. Didn't have a single hair on my head and couldn't go out without a mask but feeling 10 x better now 💪

Glad to hear it, go all out and enjoy yourself!

Superworm24 · 18/12/2024 21:16

I hope that everyone who is having a rough time or grieving can have some peace and happiness over the holidays.

I am excited. After years and years of fertility issues we finally have our baby. It will be a quiet Christmas at home with a few gifts and lots of nice food.

YankSplaining · 18/12/2024 21:17

I just went to my kids’ school concert yesterday. My six-year-old daughter looked adorable singing Rudolph with her class, and I’m pretty sure my ten-year-old daughter managed to hit the low trombone note on “Good King Wenceslas,” so that was nice. Gifts have been a little hectic, but it’s a nice Christmas season in the whole so far. 🙂

Iceache · 18/12/2024 21:18

I love Christmas and have been feeling Christmassy since November. We have had a stressful month in work and renovating our house, and I don’t feel particularly organised with gifts, but it’s okay as we’re not a huge gift family anyway: my husband and I aren’t buying for each other because we’re going for a nice meal and little night away just after Christmas Day. My parents come to us for brunch and dinner and the day is mostly about drinking champagne, cooking, opening presents, eating amazing food and a nice Christmas Night walk. Then that whole period after and before new year when you become cheese and booze. Oh I LOVE this time of year!!

AyrshireTryer · 18/12/2024 21:18

I used to have a partner and his mother in law who were extroverts and found the whole thing a huge chore, Add to this ex was a vicar, so the whole church circus and many years I just felt like crying and not being able to show it. In-laws would come for ten days minimum - it has been over two weeks.

Current partner would describe himself as a quiet man.
We have a few family coming to us for Christmas Eve - a few hours. He is doing the catering.

We are going out for Christmas Day lunch to the restaurant we went to on our first proper date and are seeing his family who live just down the road for the family quiz in the evening. so a few hours in the middle of the day to rest. He has suggested, in his jokey way, we take our clothes off and see what happens in the few hours in the middle of the day,

Boxing Day we have no plans.

As an introvert I used to feel stretched like the skin on a drum. The change has been dramatic and not always easy, guilt has been a huge issue.

I hope everyone's Christmas can be what they want it to be. Without being too Tiny Tim x

FrolickingTowardsTheFestivities · 18/12/2024 21:18

Goldenboysmum · 18/12/2024 20:34

Dreading it, wish I could go to bed and wake up in February, or better still not at all.

I lost my son on Christmas day 2020, I hate everything about it now.

I used to love it, but I'm not that person any more

I'm so sorry Golden Boy.
This is my 5th Christmas without my teenage son. I only make any effort for my surviving child.
I hate this time of year and really struggle to keep it together.
You are not alone xx

Dymaxion · 18/12/2024 21:18

I dread it every year, so this year is no different.

Cynic17 · 18/12/2024 21:19

The same as every year..... it's just a day. It's not that important (unless one is a practising Christian). It generates a lot of nonsense.
Roll on January!

MySandwich · 18/12/2024 21:19

I'm usually a big Christmas person, xmas jumpers/tops for every day of the month etc, but this year, my mum (who was essentially Mrs Clause herself) isn't here. It's her funeral tomorrow and in a way it's fitting it's so close to Christmas, but also so very hard.
I hope everyone else who is grieving or finds it hard finds peace this Christmas.

CoastalCalm · 18/12/2024 21:20

We have withdrawn from the whole thing really as I’m still not recovered from recent hysterectomy and infection - no decorations up going to just do a roast ham and a few sides for Christmas meal and pick up a few luxuries when we do a normal food shop at the weekend. I’ve got gifts sorted but in reality it could be cancelled and I’d not be arsed

Youhaveyourhandsfull · 18/12/2024 21:20

I fucking hate it. Endless work, endless expense. We don't have any family as we moved abroad 5 years ago so doesn't feel like much of a celebration. The kids enjoy it.

CoastalCalm · 18/12/2024 21:20

MySandwich · 18/12/2024 21:19

I'm usually a big Christmas person, xmas jumpers/tops for every day of the month etc, but this year, my mum (who was essentially Mrs Clause herself) isn't here. It's her funeral tomorrow and in a way it's fitting it's so close to Christmas, but also so very hard.
I hope everyone else who is grieving or finds it hard finds peace this Christmas.

So sorry for your loss hope tomorrow goes as well as it can

DoIhavegreeneyes · 18/12/2024 21:21

I think our politics is partly to blame for this low feeling. We were expecting so much, maybe too much. Many feel a bit let down.

MrsSethGecko · 18/12/2024 21:21

I'll be glad when the "seeing my family" bits are all over, but other than that it's all quite lovely.

Mynx · 18/12/2024 21:21

Goldenboysmum · 18/12/2024 20:34

Dreading it, wish I could go to bed and wake up in February, or better still not at all.

I lost my son on Christmas day 2020, I hate everything about it now.

I used to love it, but I'm not that person any more

I lost my son in July this year and it’s still very raw. I understand and agree completely with what you’ve written. The Christmas crowds and music really trigger me and all I want to do is hide under a blanket, preferably for ever.

Rainbow1901 · 18/12/2024 21:21

Looking forward to it because I love Christmas and everything that goes with it. However, this year have one DSS staying with us for 10 days - so have no idea whether we will see our GCs or not (long story and not mine to tell) so will take things as they go.
It's been a hard time lately as my boss has been diagnosed with cancer and is now undergoing chemo etc plus a colleague lost her mum this week who sadly never had a chance to meet her GGS, so covering extra hours for her as well as still meeting commitments for looking after other GCs. Last early get up for school run this week so looking forward to some chill out time with Xmas music, TV, food treats and few glasses of wine over the season. Will still be looking after GCs for odd days during the holidays but love playing new games the GCs have got for presents and it's good excuse to break out the popcorn and watch movies with them and generally recharge my batteries in readiness for the new year.

livingafulllife · 18/12/2024 21:21

I dont do xmas bloody hate it same as other holidays.
Im of on holiday on the 20th and ill be back in the new year when its all over.

NunyaBeeswax · 18/12/2024 21:22

Same as I've felt about it for 30 years, indifferent, mildly annoyed and exhausted with trying to be festive 'for the kids'

(Well, the one kid in my case)

If they banned Christmas and it was never spoken of ever again, I'd be fine with that.

Grinchy Bugger I are.

Sorry, but it's just shite unless you're either:

  • Wealthy
  • A kid
Edenmum2 · 18/12/2024 21:22

I have a 2 year old who is new to it and I think it's going to be very emotional! But also feeling a bit uneasy about her getting overwhelmed with presents etc...so excited with a mix of trepidation

mowthegrass · 18/12/2024 21:23

Christmas when you’ve lost a loved one is difficult. I’ve been to two funerals in the past fortnight and I feel deeply for those left behind. After my dad died, that first Christmas was awful. But he’d be very upset if I didn’t get into the swing of it for his grandkids, so we try.

EnjoythemoneyJane · 18/12/2024 21:27

I agree OP. Which is unusual for me as I love Christmas and usually spend ages preparing for it. Our whole extended family stays at ours for 2-3 days so it’s always a lot of work, but I never mind as all the preparations help get me in the party mood. We also usually do a lot of stuff locally and often do drinks for friends and neighbours.

This year I’ve done nothing. Literally nothing. Swerved every invitation and not attended one single pre-Christmas event. And I’ve felt run ragged just getting the house ready and shopping etc. I’m bloody knackered, and although I’m looking forward to seeing everyone, it does feel a lot more perfunctory/low effort this year compared to normal.

I was talking about it with a close friend and she said exactly the same - it doesn’t really feel particularly Christmassy, she hasn’t wanted to attend anything and will be relieved to just have a quiet one (her kids are with their dad).

I feel like this year has been a washout - no summer to speak of, just continual rain and mud and grey skies, which has segued into an autumn and winter that’s more of the same. It’s depressingly monotonous. I long for there to be proper seasons again, and if not I’d rather be somewhere warm doing something completely different.

WorriedRelative · 18/12/2024 21:27

LittleLlama · 18/12/2024 20:20

My Dad died earlier this year and I am finding it very hard. He loved Christmas, seeing family, yummy food and an excuse to drink plus presents (he was more excited than the children). I know he would have wanted us to enjoy it but it is difficult.

I'm sorry to hear that, I lost my Mum this month. I'm dreading Christmas. Like your Dad she loved Christmas and always got really excited about it.

I am dreading it.

Her death was sudden and unexpected. She'd written her cards and bought most of the presents as well as much of the food. It is going to be terrible trying to do Christmas day without her but we need to do what she would have wanted.

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