DF commenting on PP weight

[SparkleJolly]

Just need a rant because I've bitten my tongue and it's starting to really annoy me.

5 months PP with much longed for DS and every time we see DF he asks how I'm getting on with my fitness or when I'm getting back to the gym, but he's now started to make direct reference to my weight saying I've got a bit of timber on me or I need to shift some bulk etc. Apart from getting to grips with motherhood & my amazing son, I'm also having tests for a potential chronic condition that is affecting my ability to do the exercise I normally love doing, he is even asking now whether this condition is to do with my weight! I just feel really flat because my body confidence is already at an all time low.

DF is a fitness fanatic and has a very outdated attitude towards all things body confidence. I'm aware I need to lose a little bit of weight and get moving again but I don't need it pointing out every time we see them! What do I do!?

Thanks everyone! It's made me a bit teary actually reading all your messages, definitely going to put my massive PP pants on and tell
him when he mentions it again!

I would tell him straight.
Pack it up with the judgmental remarks about my body or you won’t be welcome here.

I think you have to be very direct, repetitive and calm. Think: broken record.

"Listen, this is important: I don't want to hear any more comments about my weight or my appearance Dad"

"I've asked you once already Dad, don't comment about my weight or appearance"

"Dad, I've already asked you twice now. If you mention my weight again, I will leave and go home, I mean it".

"Dad, you haven't listened to me about not commenting on my weight, so like I said, I'm going to leave now. I'll give you a call when I'm home"

"I'd love to see you again next week Dad, but like I said before, I won't accept comments on my weight or appearance from you - so you have to agree that topic is off bounds if you want me to spend time with you"

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to make comments about my weight. If it happens again, I'll leave again like I did last week"

Etc etc etc. It will probably take a while but you train him to stop doing it. You don't have to have an argument, just be calm and consistent. It's a bad habit for him that needs to be broken.

Sounds like my late FIL.. he body shamed my husband relentlessly it made me hate him (my husband isn't even fat, just not the string bean he was aged 17 anymore)

This, it’s a toxic attitude to have towards your own DD.

It's made me even more determined to be even more body positive with DS when he's old enough to understand!