Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Sending photos of our children

4 replies

Mumoftwotobe24 · 18/12/2024 06:44

trigger warning for obvious reasons

So myinlaws have these friends who they’ve known probably about 7-8 years and live close to where they owned a holiday rental. They no longer own it so it’s not like they would typically see these people regularly now. I’ve always found them odd and pushy, like expecting us to to wake our baby up when we went to see them and when he was a bit older repeatedly trying to offer them drinks/snacks that were too old for them. They seem to have a really unbalanced friendship with my in-laws whereby they seem to consider my inlwas really close friends and invite them to family functions and my in-laws generally don’t have much positive to say about them. I have no idea why they maintain this friendship. Anyways the couple gave our now 2 children Christmas decorations. The wife then apparently demanded to see pictures of them holding the decorations (to the extent my MIL lied about not seeing the kids as she didn’t have the pictures to send). Last week MIL informed me (not asked) she was taking these pictures and spent a while trying to get my toddler to pose nicely. Later mentions the couple have also given my toddler this 2nd hand outift and are now demanding to see pictures of them wearing it.
My husbands view is that it’s overstepping but they’re harmless and lonely, so to humour them, but my protective instincts have been alerted and I feel this needs to be nipped in the bud. I do however have some personal and professional experiences related to ab**e that may be making me hyper vigilant. We barely know these people and are unlikely to see them again in real life.
it seems like a no brainer to not send these pictures. AIBU to tell my in-laws not to send photos of our children to them or others without gaining our consent? I’m questioning their judgement also now.

OP posts:
Justyouwaitandseeagain · 18/12/2024 06:49

At most, I would send a picture of the decs on the tree, no need to send anyone pics of your children if you don't feel comfortable and don't want to do so.
definitely agree you are fine to nip this in the bud. Yes it's probably harmless but you shouldn't go against your instincts and you don't owe them anything.

namechangeGOT · 18/12/2024 06:49

I would just tell your MIL to explain to weird friend people that child's mum and dad are not happy with photos being sent to anyone other than family and so she will be unable to do so.

CatchHimDerry · 18/12/2024 06:57

We had one like this. Situation totally escalated and we had to cut her off as it was just too much (innapropriate comments on social media etc. and borderline stalking)

Rarely hear from them now, fortunately

It might be harmless but when it affects you, sometimes just have to do what’s best for yourself and family

SnoringPets · 18/12/2024 07:07

I think this over-stepping is a red flag. Your in-laws sound like they are being groomed.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread