Any couples managed to treat long term erectile dysfunction?

[Hollyandivygoout]

DH has always had issues with getting and maintaining erections ever since we met in our late 20s. He’s such a good partner in other ways that we’ve still got a good, close relationship but the sexual side has never been great. He started taking viagra a few years ago which has been been a massive improvement. However, when we make love he still wants to rush to the act, probably worried about losing the erection. He likes to do the same things and positions etc every time we do it probably because he knows it works. We have to do it in bed with curtains tightly shut as he is very afraid of anyone hearing us or seeing us.
Recently there have been a few times when the viagra hasn’t worked and he is now talking about dealing with the underlying issue without it. Im not sure if this will work or not but want to try. Where do we start? He’s been to the doctor and all well including normal testosterone level for his age (50).

Hi.

I am in a similar situation.
Passion and sex was exciting before marriage but now it's non-existent and we have only been married 2 years. He can't maintain an erection and it's caused awkward moments where we don't even attempt it now. I want to have a conversation with him about trying but I don't want to upset him.
How do you speak you your partner?

Same here really. I find it really hard to talk him about it because I don’t want to make him feel even worse. I wish I could turn back time though and tackle the ED a not let it drag on this long (20 years plus). My advice to you is to start talking to your partner and ask for help from GP, I so regret not doing that earlier.

It sounds like an emotional problem. My DP really suffered with for problem for a couple of years. Viagra helped until it didn’t. What worked for us is, I sat him down and spoke about it. I told him, even if the erection doesn’t last there is no pressure and I will understand. Take the stress out of it. If it works great, if it doesn’t then fine. We will figure it out. Does foreplay help?? Toys?? These things both helped us.

@Dodgyshoulder Thank you. I think it’s emotional too but very deep lying. I have tried taking the pressure off and not making it about the act itself but that actually seems to make it worse! Too much foreplay also makes him loose the erection.

It sounds more like a mental block.