Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Job offer help please

22 replies

cupofteainpeace · 16/12/2024 17:01

Eldest child just got first Grad Scheme job offer. Dh and I work in a completely different field so not au fait with how the 'real world' operates regarding job offers.
He is trying to get hold of someone at uni to help him, but thought I'd post here too. Hope someone can help.

The issue is, it's his first offer, but not in the field he really wants to work in. According to him it's not great pay, and it is close to home. He says some better grad schemes more relevant to what he wants to do haven't even opened yet.
He has 1 week to accept or decline this current offer. It is a good offer (I think) with a well regarded nation organisation. Just not really in what he wants to do long term. He did an internship there in the summer so kind of knows what goes off there.

Would it be really bad form to accept this offer, then pull out if something better comes along? Or is that really not done?

Thank you.
CupOfTea

OP posts:
PonyPatter44 · 16/12/2024 17:04

If he has any sense he'll accept it, and then keep looking. Its always easier to find a job if you've already got a job.

What if the scheme he wants doesn't run this year due to financial constraints or whatever?

Norma27 · 16/12/2024 17:04

Accept and then pull out if needed. They will be used to it.

cupofteainpeace · 16/12/2024 17:10

@Norma27 Thanks. In our industry it would be career suicide to pull out of a job offer. Hopefully he will get in touch with someone from Uni to advise to take the job too. Good to know people pull out of offers if necessary. I'm just so chuffed he's got a job!!!

Ideally he wants to spread his wings a bit further from home, but still, in this day and age I think it's fab.

OP posts:
Anonymous2003 · 16/12/2024 17:12

Not sure what his field is, but from what you've given for us to go off, I agree with the other comments here

RegulatorsMountUp · 16/12/2024 17:15

cupofteainpeace · 16/12/2024 17:10

@Norma27 Thanks. In our industry it would be career suicide to pull out of a job offer. Hopefully he will get in touch with someone from Uni to advise to take the job too. Good to know people pull out of offers if necessary. I'm just so chuffed he's got a job!!!

Ideally he wants to spread his wings a bit further from home, but still, in this day and age I think it's fab.

Why would it ever be career suicide in any industry if you withdrew from a job offer? So in your industry if you pulled out age 19 you'd be destined to never work again in that field? Seems extreme. He needs to take it then pull out if needed.

cupofteainpeace · 16/12/2024 17:29

@RegulatorsMountUp yup. You obviously don't work in our industry. Which I'm not going to divulge by the way!
But good to know he can do this. So thank you.

OP posts:
RegulatorsMountUp · 16/12/2024 17:30

cupofteainpeace · 16/12/2024 17:29

@RegulatorsMountUp yup. You obviously don't work in our industry. Which I'm not going to divulge by the way!
But good to know he can do this. So thank you.

I dont see how it's outing to say which industry you work in but ok 😂

Norma27 · 16/12/2024 17:47

The only industry I know where it is seen as bad is teaching.
Any others it’s a part of life.

TomorrowTodayYesterday · 16/12/2024 18:29

cupofteainpeace · 16/12/2024 17:29

@RegulatorsMountUp yup. You obviously don't work in our industry. Which I'm not going to divulge by the way!
But good to know he can do this. So thank you.

You can do it in any industry but it is absolutely poor form. We should not be teaching kids that it's OK to screw potential employers over in this way.

I absolutely despair at the attitudes that people have. It is so selfish and entitled. Please don't go away from this thread thinking it's the norm and it's acceptable. It seems it's the norm if you are selfish and thinking you're more important than everyone else. It is never ever 'acceptable'.

Zanatdy · 16/12/2024 18:32

He should 100% accept. It’s not great to pull out later but people do it, better to have that to fall back on for sure. My DS has a graduate job offer too, again from internship and he is happy to accept. I suggested he apply for others, but he’s quite happy with the one he’s got and it’s a good career, he can always qualify there and move on later is what he said. But even if your son wants to apply for others, absolutely accept this one.

cupofteainpeace · 16/12/2024 18:32

AH, you see, this is what I wondered. @TomorrowTodayYesterday what would you advise my son to do?

OP posts:
pinkdelight · 16/12/2024 22:46

A big national firm will understand. It's business. He's not screwing over some small family firm. He may not screw anyone over if he doesn't get a better offer. But he should accept rather than hold out. A bird in the hand and all that. I left my first job for a better job after 8 months, and ended up going back to the first firm a couple of years later. They were happy to have me back as they knew I was good and not an asshole. The company clearly like your DS as he's worked there already. If he bailed, they wouldn't take it personally. I think there's a case for unswerving loyalty in some scenarios but I don't think this is a case to be despairing of fickle youth. He sounds ambitious and like he knows what he wants and will get it sooner or later. People will recognise that and know they'd do the same if it made sense.

titchy · 16/12/2024 23:10

It's a national grad scheme. They will know that a proportion of those that accept their offer won't ever end up starting - some won't actually get the required degree classification for a start.

Withdrawing from a job offer a few weeks before you're due to start is pretty crappy, but withdrawing from an offer for a role that starts in 9 months where you know that not all offerees will start - different ball game.

Good for him for getting the offer though - took ds two years to get on a grad scheme!

CraftyOP · 16/12/2024 23:21

If he's worked there, liked them enough to apply and they like him enough to offer, what fictional job in a fictional company is out there, is it linked to what he's done or something more glamorous sounding and competitive. I don't think I'd advise someone with a grad offer in a good location not to take it and other employers don't look so well on someone on a grad scheme quitting so soon.,

cupofteainpeace · 17/12/2024 09:24

thanks all. the offer (and internship) is not the area of engineering ds would ideally like to go in. So I think he's worried he may get stuck in that area rather than doing what he'd prefer to do. But then again, a job is a job! And like a pp said, it's easier to get a job from a job, if you know what I mean. He has an appointment with a uni person this week, so hopefully they will guide him.
Exciting times!

OP posts:
cupofteainpeace · 17/12/2024 09:28

@CraftyOP I think he would describe this offer place as his back up choice.

OP posts:
gingerbreadd · 17/12/2024 09:34

TomorrowTodayYesterday · 16/12/2024 18:29

You can do it in any industry but it is absolutely poor form. We should not be teaching kids that it's OK to screw potential employers over in this way.

I absolutely despair at the attitudes that people have. It is so selfish and entitled. Please don't go away from this thread thinking it's the norm and it's acceptable. It seems it's the norm if you are selfish and thinking you're more important than everyone else. It is never ever 'acceptable'.

No. Sorry. This is not how the world works. If your grad scheme closes before others, you must know you can lose people. That’s why employers have notice periods and not lifelong contracts!

Superscientist · 17/12/2024 09:37

I work in quite a niche sector we have had people start 3-6+ months after job offers due to various issues with being ready and they haven't pulled the offer. We have also had people pull out days before they are due to start.
We have a real issue finding the right people to fill position which means the company is flexible during the recruitment process

NineToFiveish · 17/12/2024 10:14

Bird in the hand as it were - what if nothing else comes off, would he be gutted to have turned down this offer?

I don't believe he'd be 'stuck' if he took this and then wanted to pivot to something slightly different in future. People do this all the time.

anniegun · 17/12/2024 10:18

I worked in grad recruitment for many years. It is very normal for graduates to pull out if they get a better offer. Recruiters do not like it but the bigger ones "over offer" to factor it in. Accept it and stay engaged . Then if another , better offer comes through he can politely and respectfully withdraw.

BookGoblin · 17/12/2024 10:26

Grads pull out all the time!

He must accept this offer, what if he doesn't get another?

Norma27 · 17/12/2024 12:40

I have worked on grad schemes and currently work for the civil service. We have a lot of new starters here pull out before starting. As said above the large companies are used to and expect some to do so.
I had a job offer withdrawn due to Covid. I was gutted but understood. As I dealt with it well I was then reoffered the job 18 months later which I took up.
A small company I can see that it would cause more problems.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page