Hello all
So I am going to summarise this a good bit, there is too much back history.
My mum and dad divorced back in 1995... mum has married 3 times since then. Dad only married another 1 lady who was a hidden alcoholic so that ended badly.
My dad has had mental health issues most of his life. He is 76 and lives alone now. He has been quite mentally and verbally abusive to me all my life, but I always give him a free pass due to his mental health struggles, and he always made it up with me, I still try my best with him as it means a lot to me to give him some family life, I am an only child and other than me and my children he has nobody. I also have to deal with his funeral (he keeps unwell, has had 2 strokes and has bad mobility and insulin dependant diabetic)
However he often takes aggressive mental turns, and this one is the worse in a long time, maybe ever.
He is blaming me for something that happened when I was 10 years old and I'm almost 40! My mum left him and took me abroad, that destroyed an already mentally done in man, I chose to go with her instead of stay with him and his wife who didn't like me... I also cant remember much of anything from my childhood due to the amount of childhood mental trauma and constant upheaval and my mother was an awful mother too, she makes up for it now... has apologized etc
my issue is... what do I do if I think my dad needs help? He is very secretive and resistant to me helping him, we had Christmas / my 40th planned and he now brings all this up and I am really devastated.
He has tried to disown me a few times before, dur to his anger, and today I find out... a 30 year grudge on a traumatised 10 year old...
I always usually go running an writing letters etc to try get him back in the fold... I feel sorry for him still. It breaks my heart. Nobody would be checking up on him now he has cut contact with me again, he lives about 30 mins away from us.