Glazed expression during conversations

[Feliznavidog]

Does anyone else seem to encounter more and more people who just seem uninterested in conversations? Or rather, what the other person is saying?

Luckily not the case with most of my family members or very close friends but I’ll often be out with a friend or talking to an acquaintance at a party or something and we’ll be having a conversation and I just feel whenever I say something they instantly switch off.

I’m a very active listener, engaged in conversation, ask questions of people and take an interest in people and what they have to say. I often feel this isn’t reciprocated? I can have a whole conversation with someone and not have a single question asked of me, not even ‘how about you?’ Similarly, I could have asked a question of someone and they’ve talked at length or they’ve been telling me an anecdote, and the moment I start to respond with either my own anecdote or thoughts on the matter I just see a glazed expression or a slight flicker that I know means they aren’t very interested.

I really don’t think it’s because I’m droning on or anything like that! It just makes me feel like so many interactions are one sided these days. Are people just lost in their own thoughts now more than they were before?

TBH I get a glazed look on my face listening to my own conversation let alone the person I'm talking to.

I completely agree with you but I am sometimes guilty of doing this myself if I'm not too careful. I work in a profession where we use communications skills in active listening, paraphrasing, asking open/direct questions etc which tbh I feel are skills everyone should have. When conversing with other people either at work or socially, I often find other people aren't interested in me or what I have to say, maybe I'm just a super boring person!

I do get that some people have neurodiverse needs so their communication styles are different, or that some people lack social skills, or that they are just plain rude, for for majority of people communication skills should be a core skill. I do think social media and our new ways of interacting are to blame!

I agree.
I think also that some people are so used to permanently having their noses in their phones, and flitting from one thing to another, they find it difficult to give an actual person their attention for more than a few seconds. They say what they want to say, and are then too impatient to listen to the other person.

Some people really can't help it!! I have always glazed over (my entire life) and there's nothing I can do to stop it. My mind just suddenly switches to something else even when I'm very interested in what's being said. I'm actually well known for being a very nosey person so I love hearing what people say but after a few minutes something comes into my head and I know I must have a glazed expression.
It's nothing to do with boredom. I think some people just really have problems ficussing their attention for more than a few minutes.

I know quite a few people like this, and they are all on the spectrum. All talk without taking a breath for a long time and I do the verbal nods etc but it's not a conversation a lot of the time. They just have so much in their head. I find I have to get firm and say "can you let me talk" which works 😆

How many people give us their full attention when we talk? I have noticed that many people seem to be busy or distracted all the time. They are busy with their phones, distracted by things going on around them, in a rush and unable to spend much time actually conversing.

This is very true!!

I was going to say, yes, I think it’s partly to do with attention spans.

I hear you, OP. I had an interesting interaction with an acquaintance who said that she felt like I was waiting to be asked questions whereas all her other friends just butt in with their opinions. It made me realise that that is exactly what I was doing and perhaps that's even a bit passive aggressive in this day and age! So I've resolved to be a bit more assertive in conversation and just say "I must tell you about...." rather than waiting for somebody to ask me.

Oh I hate it when people look bored as soon as I start talking, or when they interrupt / start talking to someone else. As a person with social anxiety, it makes me feel awful and boring! YANBU.

I glaze over reaaaally quickly since I changed to a different SSRI.

I definitely notice people that don’t have conversation skills. They want to talk about themselves and only themselves.

I’ve always told my kids 2-way conversation is a life skill and should be like a tennis match, with involvement on both sides.