Yes, you should brace yourself - for the whole experience of having a child instead of a baby.
You could have
'What happened was...Richard was flying his aeroplane and, well, it unfortunately caught fire and crashed just as she walked past him' (one visit to hospital, tube of superglue and a bit of an awkward conversation with the childminder over the phone an hour and a half into my first day of a new job)..
'She was running towards the climbing frame and Jamie was running to the sandpit and unfortunately their trajectories crossed at head level' (one egg sized lump each and being picked up off the playground floor when they'd bounced off one another and ended up flat on their backs)
'Anthony was teaching me to rollerskate but he DIDN'T TEACH ME HOW TO STOP FIRST. But the kneepads and wrist guards and elbow pads and helmet you got me worked until he was picking me up from down the slope by my legs and he DROPPED ME. You can't get a nosepad, can you, Mummy?'
'Look, Mummy, I'm riding Krystelle's bike, Mummy, Mummy, MUUUUUUUUMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!' <crashing sounds and retrieval from inside a rose bush>
'Well, mum, what happened was that they were all playing really nicely, but then there was a bit of a disagreement and then, um, she was holding the spade and somebody else wanted it and, um, well, we've decided we'll have plastic spades from now on as the other child wasn't very kind to her, but even though she's very little, she wouldn't let him have it until just as we ran over. But then she really let him have it'.
'I'm so sorry, what happened was we were doing the accident book because she had a bit of a bump and when we were looking, we saw some more bruises, so we've got to record those as well...' 'OK, how'd you get those ones?' 'Dunno' 'Did you fall over at all today' <looks at me like I'm an idiot> 'We were playing football. And in PE. And I jumped off the bench at playtime. And when we were running out from lunch'
'Why do you have more plasters than knees?'. 'I was doing kneeslides with Andrew, Mummy, but he was wearing trousers and I was wearing tights and I slid better than him, only I slid off the grass and onto the playground'.
'Well, I was out on my scooter and Dad's dog and I thought that Henry would make a really good sled dog. Which he was. But he was faster than I thought and I only taught him mush, not whoa, which he didn't know because he's not a pony, so it's not Henry's fault, Mummy, he's just a dog and he wanted to do what I told him to do'
'So, tell me about her thumb' 'How about you tell the doctor, DD?' 'Mum was in the bath and I was doing my homework and the cat wanted to come in, so I opened the door and the wind caught it and even though Mum always tells me not to, I had my hand in the door. The door went bang, I yelled and Mum came outside bringing most of the bath with her and then I looked at my thumbnail and it was all manky, so Mum got some ice and a teatowel and said we'd better come here once she'd got some clothes on because everybody could see her...' 'OK, I think the doctor's got the idea now'