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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To encourage my children to eat vegetables at every meal?

47 replies

JollyPeachShark · 14/12/2024 23:50

I grew up in an unhealthy household so I like my children (2, 6, 8 and 11) to eat fruit or vegetables with each meal. DH says it’s not worth the battle as DC (8) really doesn’t like them and not to worry. I worry about setting healthy habits. AIBU?

OP posts:
Pinkpurpletulips · 15/12/2024 01:20

I think it depends on how it's served. My mother was a wonderful mum but what she did with cabbage and silverbeet was an abomination - boiled to slime stage. I steadfastedly refused to eat it as a child and meals were a battleground.

With my own children who didnt much like vegetables, I tried a different approach. I grated carrot and really finely diced celery into lean mince for cottage pie and spaghetti bolognaise. I experimented with vegetables they were okay with such as green peas. My youngest doesn't like raw tomatoes at all so he got the tiniest bit. At one stage I hid a small amount of cooked cauliflower puree in the mashed potatoes.

I accept my sons are possibly never going to eat asparagus. I just serve my youngest peas if we are eating it. I didn't force them to clear their plate but encouraged them to have a mouthful at least.

A lot of vegetables are more palatable roasted with a little oil - I cut up potatoes, kumara, carrots, parsnips, a few onions split into quarters or eighth, a clove of garlic crushed in and enough olive oil to coat - best to mixing with hands. I put non stick foil at the bottom of the roasting dish to make clean up easy and put it in the oven for about 40 minutes at 200 degrees, turning vegetables half way through. Stir fries are another good way of getting them to eat vegetables. Just make sure stuff is tiny - my brocoli is just tiny - no big stalk bits, just tiny florets, my carrots are slim batons etc.

I discovered one son liked coleslaw and what could be healthier than raw cabbage. Also, if I am using frozen peas I just pop them into a cup - no added water - put a side plate on top and microwave for 1-2 minutes. They come out tasting very fresh and not overcooked and with minimal clean up.

You can also sneak vegetables into say a chicken pie. Sticking a bit of pastry on something can increase the chances of them eating it. Homemade pizza has some possibilities for increasing vegetable content. Or if they can be persuaded to eat vegetable soup - doesn't have to be homemade. My children liked pumpkin soup. A lot of children like baked beans - you could do a baked or microwaved potato and do topping of a small amount of baked beans or just serve them as the vegetable.

I just had to accept my children were never going to like raw tomato - okay with it in pasta sauce though. But they were fine with diced red or yellow capsicum with lettuce and Italian dressing.

My eldest grew up to be a vegetarian!

Notcontent · 15/12/2024 01:22

HPandthelastwish · 14/12/2024 23:55

It depends on what you mean by 'encourage'.

Giving them access to a wide variety and feeding them the ones they like is great. Making them remain at the table until they've eaten every last bite when the dinner is cold is less so.

Experiment with how you serve things. DD prefers her salad not cut up and not mixed, so half a cucumber, a full tomato, large lettuce leaves, half a pepper she says they taste better and are more flavourful whole - and actually she isn't wrong although it doesn't look great on the plate.

Mangos, bananas, pears or any moist fruit are great whole but not cut up as they are slippery/slimy.

Grapes she'll eat frozen but not at room temperature.

Edited

Yes - this. My dd was a “fussy” eater when a child but happily ate fruit and vegetables when served in separate pieces.

coxesorangepippin · 15/12/2024 01:25

Yeah we try to have five portions a day

It's easier in summer tbh

DancefloorAcrobatics · 15/12/2024 01:26

I would just plate up the main meal (meat, veg whatever) and let them get on with it. It really doesn't need mentioning or a battle.

They might eat it or not, but the option is there.... I also think if they are hungry enough, DC will eat most things!

Gleeanda · 15/12/2024 02:08

It's all about what you both mean by "encourage" and "battle".

I served veg in every meal, binned a lot of it, just kept providing it and modelling eating it and pretended not to care whether they touched it or not. One of mine didn't eat a vegetable for over a year. Not that I was counting or anything 🤣 but we got there in the end.

Brandyb · 15/12/2024 02:15

Gleeanda · 15/12/2024 02:08

It's all about what you both mean by "encourage" and "battle".

I served veg in every meal, binned a lot of it, just kept providing it and modelling eating it and pretended not to care whether they touched it or not. One of mine didn't eat a vegetable for over a year. Not that I was counting or anything 🤣 but we got there in the end.

Exactly this.

Gonna be smug and say both my kids were baby-led weaned and, although we did have the odd food battle, it is the way forward: they eat veg/kimchi/tofu/sophisticated meals like champs, because they chose to try it without any pressure whatsoever. If you model that it's normal to eat it, they generally follow?

You can hide the veg and that's great but at some point it'd be good if they faced and embraced the veg!

I say starve 'em for a week and then put a plate of aubergine in front of 'em.

Pinkpurpletulips · 15/12/2024 03:07

If I'd followed baby led weaning mine would still be chugging down bottles of milk. My nanny told she'd never met a baby so uninterested in solid food. Yes we did try to cut down the milk and offer food before milk. My eldest would eat three things and believe me I offered all sorts of things and so did their pre-school. When my best friend said her little boy was sick after eating cauliflower cheese I told her I was amazed he'd eaten it in the first place. Of course my mother said I too was a milk guzzler with no interest in food either. People who don't have food fussy children congratulate themselves on their parenting but I suspect there is a large genetic component.

Perfect28 · 15/12/2024 08:21

You should offer them every meal and model eating them every meal but force? No.

HairOfFineStraw · 15/12/2024 12:53

DS3 ate an entire carrot next to my head at 8am this morning. But will often fight me on veg at meals.

I thought today was a win but my goodness it was too early for that noise.

-overstimulated mummy

Solmum1964 · 15/12/2024 16:09

For some reason both DTs decided they didn't like broccoli at the same time - about 2 1/2.
Every Sunday one floret was put on their plate and after about six months they just ate it.
Neither liked courgette or mushrooms but these were finely chopped/grated into Bolognese and chilli to make it go further.
One is now vegetarian and happily eats both whilst the other still complains however they are both more adventurous than I am but I was put off a lot of things with overcooked school vegetables!

suki1964 · 15/12/2024 16:26

When SD came to live with us at 13 - a fully fledged veg dodger. She only actually liked tinned sweetcorn and Bigga Peas. So the roast dinner had those, and say ONE cauliflower floret , 3 or 4 carrot batons , one tablespoon of cabbage - whatever, just a tiny amount alongside the rest of the dinner she did like - we got there slowly over a year. She took to roasted roots first - obviously very naturally sweet, then she found she liked fried cabbage and bacon and so it went. I would always "hide" veg, but she also liked dinners like mince and stew where you can cook loads of veg in and not taste it when eating

Now a mum of three she has used the same tactics on her three and they all eat some veg or fruit daily

Its not worth making a drama out of every meal.In my day we were forced to clear the plate of everything and meal times were often full of snot and tears and back in my day it was always overcooked watery greens and soggy marrow - not the range of veg available today

olympicsrock · 15/12/2024 16:44

My two boys 13 and 9 are both really fussy about veg.
They like carrots peas broccoli parsnips cucumber tomatoes . One like peppers.

one tolerates mushrooms . Both tolerate salad
neither like onions .

I don’t force it to be honest. Life is too short to have battles over meals .

Hehooi · 15/12/2024 16:45

YANBU.

Vegetables = a hill I’m prepared to die on.

Growing up, a meal wasn’t a meal without a pile of steamed veg on the side. I still feel the same and I always have at least three different vegetables with a cooked meal for the family. Husband is used to it but MIL (from a different culture) definitely thinks it’s weird! She thinks a bit of roasted pepper counts as veg, but that’s all oily - where is the broccoli?!

Anoisagusaris · 15/12/2024 16:47

To me, a ‘meal’ can mean breakfast, lunch or dinner. So no, I don’t give vegetables with every breakfast or lunch (some lunches, not all).

PomandersandRedRibbon · 15/12/2024 16:47

Op you have to get really creative with it, unfortunately forcing them night after night will make them dig in and hate it.

Obviously home maze roasted pasta source is a good one, little tapas pics they can choose with dips is good.

Sometimes they'll hate something raw but love it cooked and nice versa or downed on gravy

My dd likes her salad cut up small and drowned in salad dressing also don't forget nuts and seeds.

Anoisagusaris · 15/12/2024 16:47

olympicsrock · 15/12/2024 16:44

My two boys 13 and 9 are both really fussy about veg.
They like carrots peas broccoli parsnips cucumber tomatoes . One like peppers.

one tolerates mushrooms . Both tolerate salad
neither like onions .

I don’t force it to be honest. Life is too short to have battles over meals .

Compared to many kids, that’s not being fussy!!

PomandersandRedRibbon · 15/12/2024 16:48

@Hehooi actually it's amazing what peppers have in them I looked them up recently

PomandersandRedRibbon · 15/12/2024 16:49

I also supplement with veg juices once or twice a week, carrot, celery and beetroot, pepper and parsley but I sometime have to also offer gunmjes

IlooklikeNigella · 15/12/2024 16:50

I'm with you one hundred percent. You want to set them up with habits for life. It's worth the battle.

Hehooi · 15/12/2024 16:55

PomandersandRedRibbon · 15/12/2024 16:48

@Hehooi actually it's amazing what peppers have in them I looked them up recently

Oh they are delicious too! But I still want some greens 😂

LindorDoubleChoc · 15/12/2024 17:09

Yanbu. I think eating a lot of vegetables and some fruit is important for everyone. We always gave our kids some sort of veg with every main meal - now they'll eat everything except cougette and celery (DD). DS not so keen on potatoes.

BellissimoGecko · 15/12/2024 18:58

How can they like no veg? They are all so different!

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