To be disappointed in sis

[Charltonstrek]

I hardly ever bother her since she moved 60 miles away despite the fact I've had bad mental health and gave struggled and I know she has her and have struggled with life but I needed to talk today and on calling her she said she was out and would call in a hour but she never did aibu to feel upset by this as I hit a very low point today and didn't hear back from her.

You don't bother with her since she moved a whole 60 miles away and then get the hump when she doesn't jump for you ?

@kelsaycobbles The OP said she doesn't bother her, not bothered with her.

She may have got caught up OP. Maybe just drop her a message and say is she ok to talk yet?

She doesn't bother her, not bother with her.

She said she didn't bother her, not bother with her. Big difference.

I'm sorry your sister isn't there for you OP. Do you have other people around you?

It sounds very disappointing. Was she aware you were upset and needed her? Is that typical for her?

I don’t think there is enough context but have you thought about how your sister is? What she maybe going through? Maybe she didn’t have it in her to phone you back when she is trying to deal with her own things? I say this as someone whose sister has sucked the life out of me over the years, never asks about me, never bothers with my kids, always has dramas and I’ve tried and tried to support her despite my own life and I’m at point not I can’t keep doing it.

The context : meaning is confusing - op doesn't bother her since she moved away - did op use to bother her ( is drive her mad) ? Or do op mean you mostly ignore her since she moved away ? What is meant by not bothering her ? And is bothering her the only reason you would have for contacting her

It's a strange phrasing

She means she doesn't ask her for much, it's not that confusing. Her sister moved far away, OP doesn't mither her much but today needed her and sister couldn't be bothered to call back.

That’s sad but try and build a network up around you if you can of genuine friends - family are not guaranteed genuine friends imo

i hope you are ok .. this is a very difficult time of year op 💐

Did you tell her it was important you talk to her. Do you keep in regular contact with her, ask how she is etc.

I think it could also mean she doesn’t talk to her much. If you don’t invest in other people they’re less like to invest in you.

How is your sister doing at the moment?

Is she busy? Stressed?

Does she have the time, emotional strength and capacity to support you?

Do you have anyone else to lean on, or do you rely on solely your sister for support?

Do have professional counselling?

I wouldn't be in a rush to call someone back if I know the call is just so someone can dump all their emotions on me. It's not how most people want to spend their Saturday.

You need to contact the Samaritans or other orgs.

Yes I meant I try not to bother her too much but I hit a low point today. She does get easily distracted by other stuff I guess

Sorry to hear you’re in a bad place OP.

Your sis has no way of knowing this though. I would suggest that you’re honest and tell her that you’re feeling really low.

If she still doesn’t call with support then she is in the wrong and maybe someone you can’t rely on. But she deserves to know that you need her right now before you judge her for not being there.

Sending strength and ❤️