to think 'bad character' people are friends with other 'bad character' people (both celebs & real life)

[cidiyic]

I was thinking that people generally tend to be friends with people who are like them in some way - in terms of both character and interests.

Decent kind people tend to be friends with decent kind people.
Self interested, sell your granny for personal gain type people tends to be friends with people like them.

so like It's no surprise that Leonardo di Caprio had his 'pussy posse' or was hanging out with P Diddy for example because he doesn't have real respect for women so its not a suprise he's friends with people like that.

have you ever thought less of someone or gone off them because you found out they were friends with someone who is 'bad' in that sense?

This has just happened to me. A woman who I always thought was perfectly pleasant has just behaved in the most shocking unprofessional and selfish way - basically chucked a load of people under the bus so she could promote herself without a care. She's one of those people who has a very upbeat sunny 'front' so comes across if you don't know her as very nice. I was really shocked at how callously and don't care she was.

But - this the interesting bit - she is very good friends with a man that I've always found a bit questionable - never really clicked with and felt like he's very fake. It always surprised me that they are friends.

Now I've seen behind the curtain of the woman, I'm now thinking that probably both of them are the same kind of character - which is why they are friends and in fact I should have spotted this years ago because of her close friendship with him.

Do you think there is anything in this? that if youfind out someone is good mates with someone you don't like or think is a bit dodgy, it should be a warning sign about that person's own character.

Yeah. Birds of a feather and all that

ah yes @wizzywig I'd forgotten that phrase.

Yes, but they also tend to befriend decent people or people pleaser kinds to take advantage of them then drop them when it suits. If every self interested person only bothered with self interested people then they wouldn’t get as much out of a friendship because they are supposed to be reciprocal.

Bullies tend to attract weak people. Yes people tend to be friends with others like them. Fake people have no integrity.

Yes agree op, people like to spend time with others who don't challenge their personal outlook or make them uncomfortable about who they are... and when people do develop a relationship with someone not like them there is usually an ulterior motive and it won't go the distance.

... and when people do develop a relationship with someone not like them there is usually an ulterior motive and it won't go the distance.

I wonder if that is why there are so many groups of 'fake' type friendships in Hollywood. It makes you wonder about the rest of them. Once you start thinking like this it's a domino effect.

For example, I've never really warmed to Blake Liveley at all and all the publicity surrounding her poor interview behaviour now makes me seriously wonder about Ryan Reynolds (who comes across well in interviews but is obviously very money obsessed and business orientated - decision to buy any sports team with a view to making a documentary reality show and then happening on Wrexham is pretty extraordinary when you are Hollywood $$$$). Because if he is married to someone like that, it's not very likely he is truly kind so maybe he is a very self interested not very nice person too. Which then in turn makes me wonder about Hugh Jackman - who I also think comes across well in interviews - because they are such good buddies.

I sort of agree with this because people who aren't terrible just wouldn't be particularly interested in having a terrible person as a friend. Once you find that someone acts contrary to your own moral compass, generally you don't want to be around them too much.

I guess there can be exceptions in cases of eg familial ties or massive power imbalance, but usually you can pretty much be sure that people who aren't terrible friends with e.g. racists, are ok with racism or whatever.

yes @TheCryingTheBitchAndTheFloordrobe someone was telling me that often what happens is people start by making light references to something to test the water.
so say a criminally minded person was looking for someone to help them with a fraudulent ponzi scheme they'd make a joke or tell a story about someone who got a lot of money through a fraud and observe the reaction.
or a racist person might tell a story about someone who got cancelled for telling a racist joke - include the joke in the story - and see how the listener reacts.