To be annoyed at being told to be considerate of disabled people

[DefendingPan]

This sign was in the disabled toilet in a restaurant (which is also the only baby change in the restaurant).

What’s the point of this sign? What might parents be doing that they will stop after reading this?

Because many people need reminding that though life might be challenging for them that for disabled people there are even more challenges

They are not giving up access as the access is included

however if women had approx three times more facilities than men ( currently it’s the same number in most public buildings ) then there would be plenty for all.
There would also need to be far more larger cubicles also in order to allow for the ambulant disabled, those with children and even luggage ( yes that’s also included as part of the description for those needing accessible toilets )

As it stands there isn’t and until there is we have to work with what we’ve got.

Quite. The notion that single use facilities are always in walking distance is a marvel in itself.

@Jimmyneutronsforehead the kids needing the loo is less of an issue. It’s when I need to go with them. I cannot squat on a travel potty. I can safety supervise two kids when they go - but cannot when I am peeing.

I didn't say it did. I'm always as quick as possible and leave the place as I found it. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'd take it to mean don't leave a mess since that could make access more difficult as would not putting the table back up.

I've nursed in the toilet, btw. I carry antibac cleaning wipes. I've wiped everything down, then sat on the toilet holding baby to nurse. I'm not super comfortable doing it in public, although I recently did it as discreetly as poss facing a corner in a warming tent at a Christmas market.
I've also had to change my baby and toddler on the floor in the bathroom as well. Used the wipes on the floor, laid down a towel I carry, then a change mat.

DS was absolutely terrified of hand dryers, and had a tendency to leg it. Eventually found out he's autistic.

So no, not necessarily perfectly safe.

Create the demand then.

Us disabled people created that demand for accessible facilities 30/40 years ago.

Parents without disabilities/without kids with disabilities have been riding our fucking coat tails ever since...

Ive said it before, several times and every time there is absolutely fuck all response, a yawning void, tumbleweeds... This is the biggest forum on the internet for parents and indeed, in general.

It would be VERY possible to start an effective campaign for separate facilities, for not sharing and encroaching on accessible facilities for disabled people.

It's super easy to get offended by a sign that might not even be referring to you, or to say you don't like using the facilities but sometimes you feel you have to... and then do absolutely bugger all about it, because after all, you'll only need to for a handful of years.

Takes a smidgen more effort to start a campaign or to just register a complaint at each business you use that could provide seperate facilities and doesn't.

Probably faffing. Some people do faff needlessly (whether parents or not) but this is a place / situation where any faffing could impact on others.

But yes I agree with pps- baby change and disabled loo together is a bad idea. Why not just put a table in each of the men’s and women’s loos? Or have a separate space for it altogether?

Pram or pushchair, changing mat on the floor of the main toilets, boot of your car if it’s nearby, on your lap in a cubicle (or child standing in the cubicle if they’re too big for lap) …

Probably because some parents can be very pushy and entitled and think a baby with a dirty nappy has priority over a middle aged adult with IBS.

Maybe instead of fighting each other, disabled v parents with small children, we can all agree facilities are woefully lacking for both. My mum is disabled and uses a wheelchair. I can't tell you how many times she's tried to access a wheelchair washroom to find mops and buckets or boxes stored in it. There should be grants for businesses to make their facilities accessible.

No. Businesses clinging on to profits is what is making governments bankrupt, the last thing we need is our taxes paying for businesses like Starbucks and the like to meet equality laws and provide accessible facilities. That is a cost of being a business, they should pay for it themselves.

Should, yes. But, if it's not happening it's not helping and those that need access aren't being helped by inaction.
It's not big business, btw, that I had in mind. A lot of small businesses don't have extra funds.

Then they should be shut down. Why should even small businesses expect taxpayers to cover any minimum cost to operate legally?

Hmmm... we'll that'd be helpful to the economy, wouldn't it?

I think so. Propping up businesses that can’t even afford to operate legally is a net cost to the Treasury, not a net gain.

Absolutely this!

Of course people with a disability should have public bathrooms that accommodate them. That’s a human right.

Parents with young babies / children also should have spaces that accommodate them. Nappy changes are essential to caring for babies, and there needs to be more changing tables - especially in the men’s room.

Breastfeeding mothers should also be accommodated and it’s such a shame that they aren’t made to feel welcome feeding whenever and wherever. Culturally some women need private spaces to breastfeed as well. The toilet shouldn’t be that place but if there’s no private parents / breastfeeding rooms available there will be even more pressure on accessible toilets.

The fact that each of these groups aren’t adequately provided for is why we have these issues and people deciding who is more “deserving” is so frustrating and unnecessary. Just creates ill feeling towards both new mothers and those will a disability. Such a shame.

Again, heh? Stoma bags are not so urgent that you can't wait 5 mins? Are you implying disbled people can't plan? So they wait until there is 30 seconds left to empty something before doiing it. All the people I know who self-catherise, do so more on a time schedule than through urgent need. SO again they plan.
My problem with you is implyiing that because they are disable they automatically have an URGENT need. DIsabled people aren't defunct in all areas of life. And I tried to explain above that assessing 'whose need is more urgent' is a bit degrading. Baby change and disabled toilets are better off separate than each mom having to ask a disabled person if he would prefer to go in front of her.
As for stoma bags, I haven't met a person with a stoma bag that didn;t want someone to quickly go in front of them before they changed their stoma bag in a public loo.

If your bag starts leaking you don’t let anyone go in front.

a leaking stoma is about as high up on the NEED list as you get! It’s also a prime example why people shouldn’t abuse the few disabled toilets that are available. Just because it is empty when you walk up to it doesn’t mean it’s not needed

Rather than this vague useless message that people will just ignore, it would be far better for the sign to give specific actions people should take:

when using this shared facility please show consideration to others:

• re-stow the changing table after use
• leave the facility neat and tidy for the next person
• be quick - others may be waiting to use the toilet

Thank you.

it doesn't need to be bespoke for either disabled or parents, users just need to take on board it's a shared facility and do what's applicable to them.

I have a stoma bag. You absolutely don’t know what you’re taking about and unless you have a stoma yourself why are you speaking for those who do ? You can’t plan for a stoma - you can prepare, and most people, including myself absolutely don’t go anywhere without emergency supplies, but you can’t plan when you’ll have a leak.

Do you know the various types of stoma and their functions ? Do you know how unpredictable they can be ? Do you know that the stoma activity can’t be controlled, or that a urostomy, for example, can spring a leak from the tiniest of breaches in skin adhesion and soak the wearer in pee if they don’t get to a loo quickly ? A colostomy can be a nightmare to control on occasion, as activity is variable and a leak can be disastrous and embarrassing. I’d class that as an urgent need. And self catheterisation is not the same as a stoma.

I would also class incontinence or urgency of either bowel or bladder as urgent need - many full time wheelchair users have spinal injuries which affect these bodily functions. A wide range of disabilities also render sufferers incontinent. So yes, there often is an urgent need, which can quickly turn into an embarrassing public accident if facilities can’t be accessed. This is what very many disabled people have to face every time they’re out in public. You might want to think on that for a while so that next time you’re queuing for the disabled loo you know what the priorities actually are.

If you're incontinent, you wear a catheter, no?

You can have incontinence and urgency issues without needing a catheter FT. How ridiculous. There are varying shades of all disabilities.

What does the 5 minute wait achieve? They’ll still need to use the disabled toilet afterwards. If there’s one available why are they waiting? Is it a test.

This thread is getting more and more ridiculous when people are adding conditions on the use of toilets by those with a genuine need.