Teacher telling 7yo that Father Christmas not real

[Peaceandquietandacuppa]

Is it reasonable for a RE teacher to tell 7 year olds that Father Christmas isn’t real?

My 7 year old DS has just told me that his RE teacher told the class Father Christmas “isn’t real” today. He isn’t one to over-exaggerate. I asked if any of the kids prompted it by asking and he said no, she just said it.

If you think it’s unreasonable, would you say anything to the school?

YABU - teachers are fine to say FC is not real at the age of 7

YANBU - let the kids / parents decide if FC is real. Just don’t say anything!

Lots of historical people called Jesus existed, and it's a popular name in some places today, but the resurrected Jesus of the bible isn't any more real than santa is.

When did some of you go to school?! I’m 38 and never had an RE teacher push any religion on me or even share any personal opinion on religion.
And of course 7 year olds still believe in Santa. It’s not appropriate for any teacher to tell a child otherwise at that age, or any primary school age.

Firstly it needs to be established what the teacher actually said. Ask other parents if their DC have said anything. At the moment we don’t know what the teacher actually said. Was it ‘now listen up kiddies, Father Christmas isn’t real’.
Or was it ‘Miss, why isn’t Father Christmas in the story of the Nativity? Is he real?’ ‘Well, lots of people believe in him, I’ve never seen him myself. What do you think?’

Secondly, having a specialist teacher in primary school isn’t so unusual. For example in my school we have IT, PE and music teachers who cover PPA. RE is often left for a cover teacher as well as it’s a stand alone topic that is covered every week. You can hand the whole thing over and not worry about it. This person is quite likely a supply or part time teacher who covers classes and the RE lessons are the easiest to do. I did this a couple of years ago and the teacher who taught the RE was Hindu. RE teachers are not rabid Christians.

Finally, RE has changed. When I was at school it was basically bible studies. These days it’s about different faiths and customs. Teaching RE doesn’t make you religious.

I agree. It is getting out of hand. 7 year olds should know the truth. How long are people planning to carry on with this.

I agree. It is getting out of hand. 7 year olds should know the truth. How long are people planning to carry on with this.

Getting out of hand 😂😂😂😂😂
How dramatic.

7 is still very young (or at least it should be).
I'd only actually tell my child if they'd not figured it out by the time they start high school.

Inequality exists though. You can't hide it. My father got hold of a second hand bike. Did it all up, added bell etc. I was thrilled. Didn't matter that a friend had a brand new girls bike.

I think it depends on where you live as well. If you’re in a 95% white area then yeah they’re all going to believe in Santa. If however you live in a multicultural area where maybe their best friend doesn’t even celebrate Christmas then they will realise earlier that it’s just a tradition.

Two decades ago there were no 7 year olds expected to truly believe in FC. Now you are expecting teachers and other children to lie. DC goes to a multicultural school and lots of children don't believe in FC. I think in those settings it is unfair to continue lying about FC for the kids sake.

Inequality is made worse though by propagating the idea that a mythical creature gives presents to every ‘good’ DC and those who are ‘bad’ get nothing.

Apart from the malevolent idea of separating DC into good and bad, how do you think DC from more disadvantaged families feel when their friends are waking up to rooms full of gifts from ‘Santa’ and they aren’t?

If it was up to me, schools wouldn’t be allowed to have anything to do with this outdated ‘tradition’.

You can always tell from these threads the adults who felt the magic of Christmas as children and want to pass that wonderful feeling on - and those that didn't.

I'm in the former camp and I'd have been seriously pissed off that a teacher spouting shite about god decided to tell all the kids that FC wasn't real. I'd go with a PP and say she must have been such a naughty kid that FC never came to her.

Absolute nonsense. I'm fifty and believed in FC until I was 10 along with the rest of my class back in the 80's.
Who is it unfair to? If you don't believe in FC then obviously you wouldn't get presents from FC. In fact you might not do Christmas at all and instead get presents at other holidays/celebrations. Any kid can believe in any religions or have any traditions they like, it's not unfair on others.

Two decades ago there were no 7 year olds expected to truly believe in FC.

What a load of rubbish. I've worked with children my entire career, across various settings and it is very common for 7 year old to still believe.
And this was the case two decades ago.
Now you are expecting teachers and other children to lie.
No, but I would expect a teacher or adult to give a diplomatic answer.

DC goes to a multicultural school and lots of children don't believe in FC.

And? Your point is? People can believe in different things. That doesn't mean adults should go around telling young kids Father Christmas doesn't exist. That would make you a bit of a dick imo.

I think in those settings it is unfair to continue lying about FC for the kids sake.

So what are you suggesting. Sitting our kids down in assembly and telling them Father Christmas doesn't exist?

Or maybe you just let families do things their own way and as an adult use your brain and be a little diplomatic.

Yeah the good and bad stuff as explanation is awful. Who the fuck are you to tell your kid that the reason someone else doesn’t have loads of presents or none at all is because they have been “bad”? It’s all well and good to believe in magic when you live a nice middle class existence but then rather than instil in your kids that they are very fortunate to have what they have, you tell them that’s it’s because they are better than others. No wonder there is snobbery and hatred of the poor. It starts early on.

So the DC whose parents can’t afford/have issues that mean they don’t buy presents are all naughty?

Total nonsense. The sooner this fairytale is confined to the past, the better.

Mine did too, there was 3 classes per year and they would mix two years together for maths and English so there would be 6 sets for maths and English set by ability and we would move classrooms for those subjects.

Exactly. Kids not getting presents are being labelled as "naughty" by other 7-12 year olds when really they are either poor or brown. Schools in these areas know it creates inequality. A letter from Santa should be fine.

If the naughty and nice element changes then I don't think people would care.

That's ridiculous, of course kids believed in Santa two decades ago! Would you say it's ok for a teacher to say to a Christian kid that God doesn't exist then? Or tell a Muslim child that Allah isn't real?

It is a widely held belief amongst adults that FC doesn't exist. This is not the same for belief in God. Use your common sense. If a teacher wants to word it like that then that is fine.

I think the teacher was out of order. We will have to agree to disagree.

My mum pretended Santa was real.
My logical brain, even as a young child, knew it was just make believe. I still enjoyed christmas. We didn't ever lie to my son. He also still enjoyed christmas.

I didn't mean poor in that sense!!! I meant I felt sorry for them since father christmas didn't visit them. These were all older kids in school (10/11) who liked to spoil the pleasure for the younger ones (7/8).

But presumably they became an RE teacher because of an interest in some way about RE. Definitely irony in them dedicating their career to teaching children fiction but then telling a child that a fictional character they believe in is not real.

So sorry, I wasn't clear. I was talking about older kids ruining christmas for the younger ones. They were not poor, it was said in a "feel sorry for them". They said it was the parents that bought the gifts so that's why I said that their parents might buy for them because father christmas doesn't come due to them being naughty. This was a longtime ago and my son says every christmas that he wishes to be young again because it was magic with father christmas..

Yes, this.

Religious faiths are usually intertwined with the culture and tradition of the child's family - and often their wider community.

It would be highly unlikely for many parents to urge their children to hold a sincere religious belief that they themselves categorically don't share.

RE is teaching children ABOUT religion, not teaching religion TO children.