To think this just shouldn’t happen in a Nursery…

[TreeChest]

It is the end of term and people are tired, children are tired. I get that.

Surely the needs of the children are the priority. Always.

So today. I’m not employed as a member of nursery staff, I supervise lunch.

A member of nursery staff is sitting while I rush about getting coats, serving/clearing food, taking wandering children back to their seats, chasing after an escapee.

Then I go outside. I’m given a very distressed child to look after while nursery staff member has a lunch break. I’m told that she’ll come and grab child as soon as possible.

Child calms down, we play. But then - later on - quite a few children are cold, tired, distressed. The original distressed child is not checked on again.

They are supposed to sleep at 1pm. No one comes to collect. Quite a few are distressed by now. 1.15pm - still no one comes. I take them in and offer to take them along to sleep, but am told - very shortly - no there is a planning meeting in the room where they sleep.

If children need a nappy change (I'm not allowed to change) - I’m almost scared to ask because of the response.

I have a few members of staff that I get on with, and they are now leaving or have left.

Those who are left really do not like me! They ignore me, sideline me or even snap at me!

This is considered a top, fee paying nursery in the area.

I just want to vent really. I keep telling myself it’s only a job, only a job…

The children are the priority not the adults having a meeting. You should know how to raise concerns. There should be posters giving the names of higher ups you can alert. It's only a job but those children don't have a voice and you do.

You need to speak with the manager tomorrow to discuss your concerns.

If this is unsuccessful, you need to raise your concerns with Ofsted.

I would also look for another job. Poor kids, you sound lovely and caring.

How many children are you supervising and what ages? It does seem unusual to have someone who isn't a usual staff member covering lunch on their own. At my children's preschool the staff took breaks at different times.

How old are these children? If multiple young children were cold and distressed and I was told they weren't allowed to come inside I would raise hell. Kindly, it isn't just a job when it comes to little kids, in my opinion anyway.

Wtf. This isn’t ok. Report immediately.

This is why I didn’t send my kids to a nursery. Stuff like that happens in some of them. I waited until they were able to speak and able to go to a small preschool with high staff ratios.
I worked with a few women who worked in nurseries in the past, and they all said they’d never send their kids to one which concreted my decision.
Poor kids. I would talk to the manager and make a complaint to Ofsted. I’d tell the parents too tbh. But you’d probably need to leave.

Children left cold, distressed and going without nappy changes? At best this is chaotic. At worst downright neglectful. One thing is certain though this isn't normal. Please blow the whistle. These are the sort of nurseries sending toddlers home with soaked nappies and rampant nappy rash.

I have family members who work in nurseries and all sadly have these stories to tell. It’s awful especially as nursery is so expensive and children are so vulnerable at that age. It doesn’t surprise me that so many children need CAMHS later on as they are being subjected to inadequate care when they need strong attachments to primary carers / key worker and they are instead having long periods either distressed or not doing healthy activities that promote development at such a crucial stage of life .

This is life in nurseries and Ofsted are not interested.
No one cares enough. Been there.
Get another job where you feel valued.

Nope it's awful and really sad. Keep challenging them and reminding yourself that you are doing the right thing. Don't ever be nervous to say they need their nappies changed, they should be ashamed of themselves.

Is it fennies by any chance?

Thank you all. It is bad, I know it’s wrong. I called out some health and safety issues when I first started - and was shouted at. Since then - I feel I’ve been sidelined.
The poor boy I cuddled at lunchtime - he is so lovely. He doesn’t warm easily with other members of staff, and they are really quite dismissive of him.

They don’t like that he calms down with me, and they don’t like me because of that either.
Nobody wants to change the nappies because it’s their lunch break. They try to get the most submissive person to do it.
It feels like bullying.

No, I think a lot of really not-great-things happen in Nurseries…

@Sugargliderwombat

No - but interesting that this situation rings true in other places too. It’s really, really sad.

I can’t say where, but it’s part of a private school where fees are high.

Do you know what? Thanks everyone - I’m going to call this out. Starting tomorrow.

They can’t sack me because I’m right, they don’t like me anyway - and - the priority isn’t my ‘likability’ - it’s about making sure the children are ok.

Good for you. I feel so sorry for the children.

I had a friend take her child out of a nursery after she once looked through a window and no one saw her. Saw what was going on.

Id always put off using one or use a childminder you have good recommendation of. Wait until they are older to use a group setting.