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Original poster

Work colleague being odd

36 replies

bustybetty · 10/12/2024 16:40

This follows on from my post the other day. My work colleague was making odd noises on Thursday so much so that both me and my the other person in the room mentioned it to my boss. Apparently its called le tchip its called teeth sucking and sounds like a duck, that alternated with praying and mumbling. We work in an open office with a TV one side and this happening the other. it was really distracting on Thursday and it was work from home on Friday so I was hoping the issue would have resolved but I'm just back from work today and its continued. Today was more mumbling and praying (??). Has anyone ever encountered such a thing before? I think she has a bag on with me because I managed to win the secret santa and it seems to have been fall out from that. Unsure how to handle as I have already mentioned it to my manager and when she comes into the room its quiet.

OP posts:
MounjaroUser · 10/12/2024 16:42

Is she usually a religious person?

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 10/12/2024 16:42

@bustybetty tell her to stop it then!

Original poster
bustybetty · 10/12/2024 16:45

MounjaroUser · 10/12/2024 16:42

Is she usually a religious person?

Shes a Muslim

OP posts:
KrisAkabusi · 10/12/2024 16:47

Why did you both go straight to the boss instead of saying anything to her? And why have you still not said anything to her?

Original poster
bustybetty · 10/12/2024 16:48

MounjaroUser · 10/12/2024 16:42

Is she usually a religious person?

Things are frosty since the problem last week and tbh I don't really want to be hauled up for criticizing someones right to pray. I just don't want to say the wrong thing which could have bad repercussions for me.

OP posts:
AlisonDonut · 10/12/2024 16:49

How do you win secret santa?

GreenSkyes · 10/12/2024 16:49

Your manager should still address it if you're all hearing it, regardless of it stopping when they come in the room. If anything it proves she's doing it intentionally.

More importantly, how do you win at secret Santa? We normally just randomly pick a folded up piece of paper with a name on and get that person a gift.

Original poster
bustybetty · 10/12/2024 16:49

KrisAkabusi · 10/12/2024 16:47

Why did you both go straight to the boss instead of saying anything to her? And why have you still not said anything to her?

my colleague asked her if she had a problem on Thursday and he was blanked. She wasn't engaging. I think I will mention tomorrow if the muttering etc continues.

OP posts:
Doggymummar · 10/12/2024 16:50

Do you not have a prayer room where she can pray in private? I thought that was a requirement these days.

Original poster
bustybetty · 10/12/2024 16:50

GreenSkyes · 10/12/2024 16:49

Your manager should still address it if you're all hearing it, regardless of it stopping when they come in the room. If anything it proves she's doing it intentionally.

More importantly, how do you win at secret Santa? We normally just randomly pick a folded up piece of paper with a name on and get that person a gift.

It was a daft secret santa where you could switch gifts, my name was pulled last and I can only guess I got what she wanted!

OP posts:
Anotherparkingthread · 10/12/2024 16:50

Honestly just put in some ear plugs or headphones and ignore her. Take them out if people need to speak to you, obviously. Cover them with your hair so she doesn't know and let her have at it. Silly cow.

CreationNat1on · 10/12/2024 16:52

I saw noise cancelling ear buds on TV yesterday, as a suggestion gift for teenagers, small unnoticeable ones. Get those.

TwigletsAndRadishes · 10/12/2024 16:58

How do you know she's praying? Unless you speak Arabic?

ThatGladTiger · 10/12/2024 17:16

Being religious does not give you the right to disrupt others.

Sounds like she’s being really petty if she’s only just started doing this. Two options:

  1. Ignore it and hope it goes away
  2. Ask her to not talk/make noises out loud. If/when she ignores you or says no then go to your boss. Get him/her to deal with it.

I’d leave it for this week and see if she’s still doing it next week. Must surely be distracting for her too!

People are so odd!

AgnesX · 10/12/2024 17:22

If she wants to pray she should do it silently or go somewhere else. And I'd say that regardless of religion.

IMO, religion should be accepted, as in allowed eg time for prayers and prayer rooms but persistent low key mumbling. Everyone needs to be considerate - itt works both ways.

CookieMonster28 · 10/12/2024 17:24

That's tough to navigate for fear of it being twisted on you for being discriminatory.

I'd probably just mention distracting noises and keep out any religious/cultural/praying stuff and say you find it distracting and difficult to concentrate on work, can your manager have a word.

SorcererGaheris · 10/12/2024 17:26

AgnesX · 10/12/2024 17:22

If she wants to pray she should do it silently or go somewhere else. And I'd say that regardless of religion.

IMO, religion should be accepted, as in allowed eg time for prayers and prayer rooms but persistent low key mumbling. Everyone needs to be considerate - itt works both ways.

I have religious practices myself and I would agree with this.

Most religious people would probably not feel the need to pray during the workday (I realise this could potentially be a bit different with observant Muslims, as I gather they're ideally supposed to pray several times per day.)

If I felt I needed to make a quick prayer in a work environment, I'd just pray mentally. I believe deities can hear prayers just as easily if they're "spoken" internally rather than aloud.

Fannyfiggs · 10/12/2024 17:32

TwigletsAndRadishes · 10/12/2024 16:58

How do you know she's praying? Unless you speak Arabic?

OP said

Today was more mumbling and praying (??)

OP put the (??) to indicate she wasn't sure if it was praying or not.

And just to note, Muslims don't just speak Arabic

HTH

JLou08 · 10/12/2024 17:35

I've never worked in an office where there aren't distractions. To be fair I am very easily distracted, even the sound of the keyboard gets to me. Can you not just use headphones?

AgentProvocateur · 10/12/2024 17:44

I live in the Middle East and this is quite common outwith prayer times. People usually mutter a prayer to themselves and do something with prayer beads in their hand. People do it on the metro a lot. I don’t know if it’s a specific prayer or if it has a set length.

Callipygion · 10/12/2024 17:55

put a statue of the Virgin Mary on your desk and start saying the rosary out loud.

holju · 10/12/2024 18:00

Maybe there is something else going on in her life outside work and she's struggling a bit. Have you asked if she's OK?

CreationNat1on · 10/12/2024 18:03

A pray off

ChocolateAddictAlways · 10/12/2024 18:05

I’m a Muslim and when we pray it’s a ritual prayer, which can be silent or whispered but it’s on a prayer mat, in a specific direction, with specific movements and not when you’re at a computer, and I always used a quiet side office, never prayed when others were in the same room as I wouldn’t be comfortable and wouldn’t want to make others comfortable.

I guess it possible she’s using prayer beads like a rosary but that’s different to the Daily prayers Muslims perform. Maybe gently ask HR to find out what’s happening.

birdling · 10/12/2024 18:06

It would be a bit of an extreme reaction to a cheap secret Santa gift for her to still be doing it today, so perhaps it is merely a coincidence and she has other, more serious, issues in her life. She could be praying for the recovery of a loved-one.