To have realised I’ll never have a peaceful morning again …

[neverever24]

Well, I will - but probably not for the best part of fifteen years.

Two young kids, obviously they are a lot of work. Older one was a 530 riser for a long time, hated that. But I’ve realised those lovely sleepy weekend mornings where you stay in bed or get up but do not much are gone for the forseeable.

DH does get them (sort of) as he works away quite regularly. I know he’s still working but no stress of getting children up. Just him, shower in peace. He does have them one weekend morning but they are so noisy it’s not much peace !

Or out for a maccys breakfast

@neverever24 i know what you mean. We’ve got a 3.5 year old and a 20 month old and their idea of a lie in is waking up at 6:30 - and that happens once in the blue moon. More often it’s 5:50. They also both wake in the night when poorly (which let’s face it in winter is about 60% of the time)

DP and I look back in awe at just how much time we used to have to do things like get up late, take long showers, have morning sex, eat a whole slice of toast and scrambled eggs without the kids snaffling half of it despite having already eaten their own. Sigh…. they are amazing but I do fantasise about time travelling back to have just one weekend of pre kid life as a breather - I would appreciate it so much more now than I used to

I think it's harder with multiple children. I am an only child and I have no memories of my parents waking up early at weekends. I was up and could sort my own breakfast from about the age of 6 and I loved spending a quiet morning with a book before parents emerged from their bedroom around 8am.
My step daughter was sleeping in late from the age of 10. We had to drag her out of bed as the whole house was waiting for her to go out for Sunday breakfast.
If you have more than one, I can see how things can quickly get out of hand with bickering.

Of course I adore my DC but I so miss those lazy Sunday mornings and leisurely brunches! We will get it back though OP, once they get older, then we’ll appreciate it even more.

How old are they?

Give me those early days, rather than trying to wake up pre teenagers/teenagers to get up and go to school. Then you get the late nights, them going out to all hours. We’ve now gone back to beginning by having a dog, who for the last 6 years wakes up at 6am every single morning.

Get some good earplugs for the morning your DH is on duty.

You will. It won't take 15 years!

Unless DH works away all weekends you should be getting the odd break. It's harder in December, but on a warm spring day he should wrap them up (even if it's just snowsuit over pjs! Nobody would know) for a long walk and a cafe breakfast. They'd love it and you could stay in bed till 11 and get up in time for have lunch ready for them to to come home to so DH can have his turn to put his feet up.

They'll likely sleep later and be more independent soon enough. My eldest is 8 and she knows to read in bed if she wakes early unless she can hear her brothers are already up (have yet to find any force on this earth that can keep them in their bed beyond 6.20 reliably). When they are all up they often go downstairs together and play nicely while I snooze with the baby and DH supervises half awake on the sofa.

Start plannig for easier weekends in the future. Eldest knows how to use the toaster and can spread butter/chocolate spread and cut into squares. Younger ones can climb in a chair to get plastic cups out (they aren't allowed to help themselves to ceramic) so eldest can pour milk for them. At the moment this is still done with supervision, but give it a year or so and hopefully they'll be able to sort themselves out a bit at weekends.

It will be less than 15 years. My DS was able to get himself some breakfast and stick the telly on to entertain himself from around 8/9 years old.

Mine are 9 and 7 and on a weekend are quite happy to entertain themselves on a morning for a bit. And it’s been this way for a few years now. Probably since the youngest was about 4 or 5. They also rarely wake before 7, quite often closer to 8 now and they can read on a morning. Although they do go to bed later.

Ok they’re not fending for themselves for hours on end, but they’re just fine getting up and watching tv, they help themselves to a cereal bar or a brioche roll and a carton of juice and leave us in blissful peace til 9am sometimes!

They do get to an age where they just get up and do their own thing but sadly I've now lost the ability to sleep in after years of getting up early. Later comes the realisation that, as they get older, you don't get a peaceful adult evening either because the older kids are still up and about!

Mine were early risers but tbh getting them up and out for school as teenagers now is horrific.

I know a lot of people don't like screens but I think there is a time and a place for them. 7:00am on a Sunday morning is tablet time for us. It allows me a bit of a lay in and a quiet coffee.

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Also why can’t he take them downstairs, put the telly on and try and be quiet? That’s what we do if the other is trying to sleep. And tell the kids to be considerate and even the 3 year old listens. I sympathise, it is tough but you need to have a chat with your DH about you replenishing your reserves. Can he take them to stay at your in laws perhaps?

Neither of them really watch TV to be honest. I wish they would because it would make life easier but they just aren’t into it I suppose. Younger one used to like Ms Rachel but even that’s lost its appeal

It is pitch black in the morning and I wouldn’t take them out for a walk myself so don’t expect DH to. It’s just our house, noise seems to really travel. It’s good to know that I’ll get my mornings back one day!

Yeah - beyond budget!

What do they like to do?

I've got a two year old, he's not madly into TV although will sometimes request an episode of Octonauts or something. More often, we read a book or two in bed, then both shower together, dressed and downstairs for breakfast. We'll usually do drawing or stickers while I make breakfast, and just afterwards.

By 8am it's usually getting light outside so if it's getting noisy/chaotic, we'll go look for leaves/snails/whatever in the garden; and we're usually getting ready to go out by 9am/9:30 at the latest.

When I was working and DS was a SAHD, I used to sometimes get up with DS on a Saturday morning at around this time, and we'd head out to the park to feed the ducks by about 7:30 or get on the bus into town and have breakfast in town. I actually had a few friends from my NCT class who had early babies too so while we were on mat leave we got into the habit of doing this sometimes so it wasn't a complete shock. it was quite nice - it was always quiet, the two of us would have a nice time, DH would be super grateful when we got back at 10:00 and I could collapse quietly somewhere for a bit!

I will say though that it does get easier. Depends on your DC when this will happen, but they will absolutely get more independent in the mornings and/or start to sleep in. the bigger issue of course becomes that you then have dance classes and football and rugby or whatever, so the mornings when you can just lie in and do nothing become very precious!

It'll get better before you know it @neverever24 I promise.

By the time mine were 6ish, they were allowed to go downstairs and have a drink and a snack if they woke up before 7 (we had a Gro Clock for them - before 7 they were not allowed to wake mum or dad up!) - I'd leave out bananas and water in bottles.

By about 8, they were able to make themselves breakfast as well, and even on occasion I'd come down to a drink made for me which was lovely.

Now all mine are in secondary school, I've LOVING the lie ins as I don't need to get them to school. It will come!

At the moment their favourite activity is to climb into cupboards and chuck the contents out; I’m not encouraging this 😂

How old are they?

Once my dc were primary age, they were fine to get up and watch TV/play quietly whilst we dozed with the door open. I used to leave out individually wrapped brioche rolls and apple juice cartons!

Haha, yes! I still have a small early riser (the older one is now a dream who just stays in bed reading or goes downstairs and fends for herself), but we alternate mornings to deal with his crack of dawn wakings. On my mornings, DP slumbers on. On any morning, my body wrenches awake in a blind panic at 5am, even if the toddler has a rare lie-in. Age is a bastard!

We each get a lay in at the weekends. Dh gets up at 530 in the week for gym/work. I get up at 615 for kids/work

Hang on in there! Mine are 13 and almost 10 now and I do get a chilled morning sometimes!
The 13 year old usually gets up later than me at the weekends