How would you handle what happened at the work Christmas do?

[SneakyLilNameChange]

Have name changed as could be outing. Long term mnetter.
This Friday was our annual Christmas Party. Cut a long story short I made an error 6 months ago (sent an email to wrong person with info on another client) nothing horrendous but still an error. I apologised profusely at the time, to work and both clients and did the necessary training to ensure didn't happen again. From my POV it was over.
At the party a manager, not my line manager but another, came over and was going on and on about my error- the time its taken her to fix etc. I apologised again and felt terrible (she was v v v drunk). Kept coming over and repeating herself.
I left at 11ish and then my work mate told me she'd been telling her and another colleague all about it when I'd left.
AIBU to be really pissed off and take this further? I was in tears all weekend feeling terrible and like the whole company think I'm a joke. Would you have a quiet word with her or go the formal route or just ignore? I have been waiting at my desk to see if she came over to apologise (haha..) nothing so far.

YANBU- make a formal complaint
YABU- let it go or solve between you

What she done was immature, unprofessional & should be holding a managerial position!
She's breached confidentiality!

If she had only spoken directly to you about it then that would be upsetting and I'd speak to her directly or let it go but as soon as she mentioned it to literally anyone else she crossed a line and at that point it's a formal complaint. I'm glad from your update you've spoken to your line manager who is rightly horrified and you are not a grass, if this manager thought it was OK to discuss your mistake repeatedly with others what else would they divulge?

I think your manager is probably right about this.

I would escalate formally. It might teach this 'manager' to handle their drink a bit better, especially at a works do!

Don't feel guilty. You didn't ply her with drink or bring up the subject. She's made you upset all weekend and could have made your work life really awkward -and she's at a management level and should know much better. She obviously doesn't feel guilty about her behaviour or she would have apologised (if she actually remembers!!!).

Everyone is probably think 'there but for the grace of god'. Meaning most people have made some mistake in their job (including this manager).
She's made an idiot of herself. Report it to your own manager.

Ah the joys of the office Christmas outing. If it's any consolation Op she's probably mortified already, if she can remember what she said, of course.

I would report it formally as Teams change and if she is in the management and you may be managed by her in future. This has all to be documented. Managers report everything formally why you can't?

What she did was bang out of order. I am in a leadership role and I never have too much to drink at these things, it’s not worth it.

YANBU,

The actions of the idiot manager at your xmas work do was to cause you unnecessary alarm and distress which she needs a reprimand for. The manager should be told to apologise to you for her absalutely atrocious conduct, she should be totally ashamed of herself.

You may need to get hr involved.

Remember, she shame is hers' OP not yours.

Just have a quiet word with your line manager, nothing formal, if your departments have got a good relationship they may have an informal word, but to be honest I bet that other manager is feeling the guilt, and in there drunk head although inappropriate may just have been an anecdote, it’s wasn’t pleasant for you but may even work in your favour, but formally complaining probably won’t

It is only grassing if you dob in a peer. She is a manager.

I am glad you spoke to your LM and they are taking it further.
She was extremely unprofessional, we have all made that kind of mistake before .
(The fact that you had to go through additional training surprises me)
The fact that she brought it up 6 months later is really poor on her part.
Even bringing it up a week after it happened would be a bit off.
Even worse that she started telling others at the party about it shows a real lack of management skills .

I used quotation marks to quote OP in the post immediately above mine. Which I presume you just read.

Seriously unprofessional of a manager to get so drunk and then breach confidentiality. Your line manager is correct and the formal route will be best. She will prob get a warning but needs to understand how serious this is. Might not realise if it was handled informally.

Make a formal complaint. She’s been highly unprofessional. She’s a manager and should behave like one.

Exactly - she was completely unprofessional

You spoke to your manager who I would have assumed would rather it was all forgotten about so they can get back to the other 100 things on their To Do list. The fact that your manager has encouraged you to make it formal indicates it's probably a good idea to do so. I'd have a clear idea (in your head at least) of what you want to get out of it, so the process doesn't drag on longer than you'd want.

ignore!

how do you usually get on with this person?

Your manager is 100% right. You need to raise a grievance. This manager should never have discussed your work with someone else. How dare she!!

Go to HR as soon as you can. That is an absolute shit show and you need to make your position clear right now.

You did the right thing to speak to your line manager. This manager is bullying you by bringing up your past mistake and deliberately humiliating you then discussing it with other employees. Being drunk is no excuse for what she did - it’s horrible and completely unprofessional. I’m quite feisty so the bitch would have had a drink ‘accidentally’ tipped over her!

If she had kept the conversation between you and went on and on, I'd have waited till she was sober and bring it up, expecting her to be a little embarassed for drunkenly being so rude, and would expect an apology and I'd be ok to leave it there.

As she brought in other colleagues and was badmouthing you, I'd find that inappropriate enough to take it down as a formal complaint.

To discuss it with a colleague to ask an opinion i.e. "Sneaky messed up by sending this email with this info in, what should I do to fix it?"- absolutely fine, apppropriate and not finger pointing. Drunkenly disrespecting an error you made months ago suggests she has more of an issue with you than the error, and she needs to be dealt with.

Your manager is supporting you and good that you now know that the matter is closed regarding the error. I bet there is an issue with this member of staff that maybe you’re not aware of.