To not bother with class cards?

[TeenGreenBottles]

DC in reception. School do a Christmas postbox, so getting cards delivered is nice for the kids.

Several mums on the WhatsApp are asking about class lists and sending one to everyone (class full so 30 kids).

AIBU to not bother sending any? I just don't have the time or inclination.

I don't mind getting cards when DC is older and can sort the rest themselves, but essentially for a 4 year old I'll be doing most of the work and getting them to even write their name 29 times will be painful. Also it seems quite wasteful of paper etc and no child is really going to treasure every card.

Will I look like a Grinch? Will I be judged by the other parents?

Will your child enjoy getting cards delivered? If so you have to suck it up, it's a community thing.

Normally I'd say go on the WhatsApp and say you're giving a charity gift instead of cards. But quantity of cards often matters to kids.

I don't suppose your child has a less common initial and so could sign the card Kx? This is where you regret calling them Penelope-Elizabeth.

Hmmm votes are different from the reply so I'm still conflicted!

A few years ago nearly every infant would bring in their 31 cards (class, teacher and TA). Now I reckon it's about a third. So if you don't want to do them, don't.

I do teach in schools with... interesting catchments. It may be very different in leafy suburbs.

No way will every child/parent do this! We've never bothered with class cards and always have got up to 10 per year.

Just don't worry about it.

Never bothered, they told us who they wanted to give cards to and that was it.

No way did we do the whole class.

But it’s great practice writing their name!

Yes you sound like a Grinch!

I just got DD1 write her name on all the cards she wanted to send at 4 She did it over a few days/sittings.

For DD2 who is too young to write her name I bought some nice Christmassy 'from X' stickers on Etsy and just stick one on each card so I don't have to write anything.

Do your children want to? Whilst painfully slow when little, my two have both always loved writing cards to their classmates and teachers. It remains one of their favourite Christmas activities.

Both mine hated writing so writing 29 cards would have been torture! We have never bothered (just one more job to do at a hideously busy time of year, and I’d rather they saved their limited tolerance for writing for the family cards) but then we don’t have the postbox thing and I can see that puts more pressure on. Could you get a stamp / sticker with DC’s name as suggested by a PP? My kids would have enjoyed doing that.

We always did it, full names. Over the course of several sittings and we made it Christmassy.

They now don't do it (Year 5 upwards) but lower down the school (leafy and NAICE) it's the done thing.

And yes, everyone judges everyone if you don't. Plus a chocolate coin too. FFS. Didn't know THAT reception year. Major faux pas.

Surely you let your child decide? I was amazed when one of mine sat down aged 4 and wrote her entire class a card each. All I did was buy her a box of cards - she did the rest.

But my other children showed no interest in doing this so never have.

We never did the whole class, just selected enough friends to use up a box of 8 or 10 cards. But my DD wanted to have cards to give out (she still does at age 15, not at school anymore but at her dance studio it is still very much the done thing) and I think that’s the key thing to consider - what does your child want to do? Surely that’s more important than what the other parents think.

Wait and see who sends her a card and send one back to those people.

I've never done christmas cards for my dc.

When they were old enough to do it themselves they didn't want to.

I don't bother with cards now fullstop.

It's a torturous process but school seems to be encouraging it so I think you need to roll with it.

My kids school bopped it on the head a few years ago. They reckoned around 15,000 cards were being exchanged between kids (500 kids x 30 cards) so discouraged it on environmental grounds.

So you need to get on the PTA and put that to the school.

Cards aren’t allowed in our school on the grounds that kids who wouldn’t get many would feel excluded. Takes the pressure off parents also.

@Anoisagusaris I think that might also have been part of the issue in my kids school.
The HT is also very conscious of the divide between the well off kids and the poorer kids. And buying 30 cards for multiple kids is money that could be better spent.

I work in primary. Over the last few years fewer and fewer chn are sending cards. I guess because the trend among adults is decreasing too. To be honest, some do , some don’t and they shove them in their bags on the last day of term to be forgotten about soon after. I would wait until they can sit and write them themselves and enjoy doing so. No need for a WhatsApp announcement, nobody will notice and if they do, they need more in their lives.

I was done to my dc who they wanted to send cards to and never the whole class. Waste of paper, time and money

Maybe get him to do a few for his particular friends just so he's giving as well as taking but honestly I wouldn't worry about it. We do them because DD is happy to sit and do them. Certainly never counted noted who didn't give her one in return!

Please don't do chocolate coins, that's just 29 treats to be removed one at a time from a child with an allergy. They don't need extra sweets at this time of year.

Your child won’t be the only one who doesn’t send cards to the whole class. No-one will notice and no-one will care.

Thanks, everyone. I'll see if DC is desperate to do it for a few friends/everyone but otherwise knock it on the head.

I do agree that it's not great for the environment/from the popularity contest angle, and that it might put pressure on some families who might struggle to afford it.