Strange choice of advent calendar

[Adtothevent]

DH and I haven't had advent calendars for years, but having had a rough few months, I thought I'd treat him to one with little luxury alcohol samples
It was expensive, but seems good quality and a good way of trying a range.

I told him it was an advent calendar when it arrived in the post, and he didn't say anything, but must have decided then to get me one too.

It's an advent poetry book, which sounds lovely. Except it has lift the flap images. For ages 3-6.

I’m not sure why all the ‘at least he tried’ posters are out in force. Sod trying, that advent calendar is for small children! Of all the calendars to get, with the huge choice or even just a chocolate one, what he thought was appropriate was some overly cutesy one aimed at children? Honestly this is a ‘low bar’ moment for people to excuse, it’s ok to want the same thought and value given to you as you do to him.

Calm down it's not that dramatic. And the DH isn't a mind reader, he didn't no the value or effort of the calendar before he bought his. Plenty of adult women here have said they'd have loved OPs calendar too, fair enough OP doesn't like it, but it's just really not that bad.

It’s thoughtless, evidently so. The op isn’t a mind reader either, yet managed not to get her husband a gift aimed at children. If they had decided to get chocolate advent calendars, would he get Lindt and the OP a 99p Peppa Pig one?

It doesn’t matter who else likes it, the op doesn’t and her husband should know her well enough to buy to her likes. A half arsed effort is as bad as no effort at all.

So do I! This year I have this one https://www.windowcards.co.uk/product-page/london-advent-calendar 😊

Because we've probably all been in a situation where it suddenly appears a gift may be appropriate, but there's zero contextual clues or precedent to tell us where to pitch it.

In his situation, I might have been thinking along the lines of "Oh crap, she's got me an advent calendar and I'll look like a dick if I don't get her one too. Why did we stop doing advent calendars again…? Can't remember… I'd better get something completely different, then. Something unique and thoughtful maybe?" and I can see how I could've ended up giving something like the one the poster above linked to.

It's not an "at least he tried". It's a "poor sod didn't stand a chance"

Of course he had a chance, as I said the op didn’t flounder at what to get her husband and grab something silly and aimed at children. It really is excusing men for not being able to have a sensible thought when it comes to buying things for women without being handheld through it. Even something as simple as an advent calendar.

How was he supposed to know she'd suddenly splurged on extortionate miniatures? From the sound of it, he didn't know what kind of advent calendar she'd got him. (He might not even have known expensive grown-up advent calendars were a thing.) It could've been a cheap jokey one or a sexy couples one or a nostalgic Cadbury's one or anything. If he'd handed over some extravagant Jo Malone type thing when OP had only intended it to be a cheap bit of fun, OP would've probably felt shit about that mismatch too.

The OP doesn’t actually seem to have expected a calendar in return, she was treating her husband to something she believed he’d enjoy. I’m sure when the package turned up he knew it wasn’t a ‘cheap jokey’ one or certainly not Cadbury. No matter how it’s dressed up, the op decided to treat her husband after what she says has been a rough time and he buys her a children’s book in return.

That is not a kids advent calendar at all! It's definitely aimed at naice middle class women who go to national trusts.

Doesn't matter whether she expected one. It's the kind of situation where people feel they ought to reciprocate, for any number of reasons.

And how are you "sure" he knew from the package what kind of advent calendar it was? It's a flattish cuboid. Could've been condiments. Or plastic ducks.

If it is that one I’m completely intrigued by this in the listing!

I buy my partner an advent calendar every year, he never buys me one, who cares! If I want one I can buy it myself, not worth getting upset over. He always comes and tells me what chocolate he has got and offers it to me if it is one he doesn't like!
He had a rubbish childhood and never had an advent calendar as a child. I get far more pleasure out of getting him one than I could ever get from one of my own.

Oh that's rather lovely OP. I haven't bought Advent Calendars this year, but may well buy that one. It's very festive and sweet. I don't much care for the ones with a cheapo choc in and the times I've bought the artisan posh calendars I've felt ripped off. This one, though, I can imagine treasuring. 😊

in case people need a novel idea or really want a "strange" advent calendar here's one that's incredibly unusual...
criminals
canada's top 25 fugitives advent calendar style with links to an interactive multimedia platform with photo's video clips of the crime scene and $$ on offer.
no need to witness or testify just find them.

That's lovely. I wouldn't turn my nose up at that.

The Power lines warning is a totally perfect example of Amazon putting absolute random shit on their listings.

I would much prefer a traditional advent calendar than one that's grossly overpriced and filled with chocolate, booze or beauty products. Horses for courses and all that.

DH just got it wrong in thinking you would like it. My DH often got gifts wrong, especially when he tried buying clothes. Not his fault and I never blamed him for it.

I chuckled at the ‘are the flaps sturdy enough for repeated use’

Yes I am immature.

It's the same old answer as 99% of these questions, surely?

He's either typically an arse who doesn't give much through to the OP and has a lifetime's history of shit presents. In which case this is just another in a long line of examples.

Or he's normally very thoughtful, tries hard to get the right gifts and cares very much. In which case this is a just an error and not one that needs picking over much.

I'd love a traditional advert calendar...sounds perfect op. Not had an advert calendar since I was a child. Very jealous of you. What picture have you got today

Advent calendars are for children.

i like stuff as much as the next person but consumerism really is bananas.

Perhaps he doesn’t realise advent calendars for adults are a thing?

Personally, I dislike the current trend for adult advent calendars. It is just rampant consumerism and encouraging people to spend spend spend. Brands jumping on the bandwagon just to add another revenue stream and additional profit for their shareholders.

I think it’s lovely, my adult DD bought me a pictures only calendar this year as I usually buy my own.

My 4 year old DGD is fascinated by my calendar as hers is sweeties in boxes and she prefers mine!

I love the look of the London calendar and will bear it in mind for next year.

Definitely feels like quite a unique find. I wouldn’t expect National Trust and Poems to instantly appeal to young children. I think if he was taking the shit easy option grabbing a cadburys one from the garage would have been far far easier. Sounds like he’s got it wrong but tried to be thoughtful.