To have called in sick in order to sort things (house) out?

[goandhohoho]

It’s probably too late as I’ve done it now and it’s more complex than the title indicates.

I actually don’t think I am very well. I have terrible insomnia - was woken at around midnight last night and I just couldn’t get back to sleep. I eventually did so at around 5 but then had to get up at half six.

I have two very young children - one is 3 and the other is seventeen months. I am frantically trying to meet their needs, keep the house in some semblance of order, work myself and spin all the plates and I can’t. The house is a mess and it feels like no matter how much I clean and tidy it, it is a mess.

So I rang in sick today. Not a total lie but equally not really the truth. I don’t know if it was reasonable or not.

I have a partner but we aren’t in a good place. No family.

ah sorry to hear this

If it's a one off not so much of a problem, if this becomes a pattern then it could be a problem. If you worked for me i would hope you could tell me about this and then I could point you towards support we could offer.

Insomnia caused by stress is absolutely a thing. Yes it is apporpiette to take time off in order to sort out your over full mind so you can do useful work when you return.

A GP would sign you off sick RIGHT NOW for two weeks if you asked

In fact I think you should. But use that time to get on top of things.

It’s fine OP. I probably should take these occasional days and I absolutely support them for colleagues and actually, my child who is highly sensitive. I always hold mine in my mind and allow myself the possibility of taking a day when everything is too much. Keeps me going.
BTW you are still in toddler hell - I promise it gets so so much easier when both are over / well into 3. Hang in there. I completely remember how frazzled I was during this time.

You are exhausted because you have taken on too much. Time to reconsider and reduce your hours.

Honestly I think it's completely reasonable and did similar when I was in the thick of it with small kids.

I agree.

It sounds like you’re burnt out and stressed which is understandable- 2 very small children and a full on job with little leave. Throw in too little sleep and it’s a recipe for disaster.

Is this job sustainable? If you can’t book annual leave when you need to?

But you’re not being unreasonable at all to prioritise your health.

It’s been a very long time since my kids were 1 and 3 but I don’t think you were unreasonable. I did not work at that time - I could not have done - one of my dc had extra needs. But I do think it’s a rough ask for mothers of 2 little dc to just get back to work. Places like Germany have policies enabling parents to get more time off.

Sending sympathy @goandhohoho . Suffering with the insomnia here too with 2 small kids and very nearly called in sick this morning. I do work from home though, so thought I'd try to push through, but it's a struggle. I hope things improve for you soon.

I wish I had a friend like you, your friend is very lucky!

Also HR. Completely agree!

I did this once a year or so for my whole teaching career (16 years)! Sometimes I'd get so tired and overwhelmed, I really needed it.

I'm now trying to find a job that doesn't deplete me in the same way....

@allthatfalafel where do you work allthatfalafel? I want to apply.

It's not always about a named illness and depends on job in my opinion. Some jobs you can muddle through with insomnia, some you definitely can't in my experience. Sounds like stress anyway.

Everyone needs a mental health day every now and again. Just because you aren't physically sick doesnt mean you dont need time off to rebalance.

But if the insomnia is caused by stress, which, in turn arises from an out of control situation such as untidiness and cleaning which can never get properly attended to, that surely can still be classed as sick leave.

OP is having a go at tackling the underlying issue to help avoid the symptom.

I've cleaned and tidied when stressed but couldn't work and my manager agreed and knew I was doing odd jobs in the house (severe panic attacks after an accident).

Sounds like you are doing something to help you avoid burnout which would have a far greater impact on your work and personal life than taking a day out to sort stuff and feel more in control. Hope you have a reasonable day followed by a good night's sleep and that tomorrow finds you feeling better

Being tired isn't being ill. Feel free to take a day off but if you're lying to your employer then don't be surprised if one day they catch you out and sack you for dishonesty. Not exactly a good role model for your kids either is it?

Give over.

Not at all OP! In fact most modern workplaces have an allocated number of 'personal days' you're allowed to take that aren't illness but are for things like this, or mental health dips etc

Teacher presumably