To be annoyed about neighbour always encroaching & making mess

[NatureLovingWalks]

I’ve a semi detached house with mine and my neighbours front door right next to each other. Would never buy a house of this design again but you live and learn. Neighbour is a serious hiker and often comes back with muddy gear. He used to clean them
off in his back garden but recently has taken to bringing them at the front chipping off the mud and banging them to loose the debris right outside our front doors, practically aiming at my house with his stuff everywhere

i have plants and a small patio outside and he’s leaving flakes of mud everywhere I have to then clean up

i know already i probably sound unreasonable but I am not in great health, even having to clear up other people’s mess is draining and I generally find it poor manners to do this

he’s not the most approachable and when I’ve mentioned before about concerns he stopped temporarily then started again

its really irritating me and causing me stress about keeping the front clean. I have a previous history with this neighbour encroaching on my property also so only just solved that

AIBU - to want to try and talk to him again? Or would you leave it

I thought you were going to be talking about rubbish and old car parts not walking boots. YABU.

It’s not the boots it’s everything being cleaned flicking mud and dried muck flinged all over my door, patio, ornaments and plants. Rather than his own property

It's sounds a bit Hyacihth Bucket to me.

No, it's very inconsiderate of him. But hey he's a MAN and can do whatever he likes, that right?

I think I'd try and catch him doing this, and aim a high powered hose at his feet ostensibly to clean up the mud. Then smile sweetly and go back indoors.

Fence?

As I said I’m not in good health so it’s causing me extra effort to have to clean afterwards. I’ve tolerated a lot with this neighbour over the years (various issues relating to damage and encroachment) so maybe I’m just fed up of what I perceive to be disrespectful. Cleaning dirty things which causes dirt and mud to be left outside my house - not his - is what I am questioning. I wouldn’t do it to him or anyone else

Clearly, we need a diagram.

Where is the hose? Is it just banging. In which case just let the rain deal with it.

I would take the stance with something like this of kill it with kindness. Open up, be honest. Offer an immediate hot cuppa on return

I would sweep up the mud flakes and leave the on his doorstep a few times

In thinking this. There are some rules around not erecting fences due to the design of the estate. I got planters up already as there were previous issues with him dumping loads of items on my patio & pathway. So the planters stop the encroachment to a degree but he just leans over them to do the cleaning thing :( and the mess comes over

I am a total slob and would do this on my own front doorstep but even I wouldn't dream of doing it over a neighbours. Ignore the ones saying you are precious, it's out of order. No suggestions though, if he is ignoring you when you ask I'm not sure what else you can do. I would probably just sweep all the mud back to his side.

He's leaning over to clean his boots?

From your first post I'd say he's being unreasonable but if he's actually leaning over the planters to clean boots, he's doing it intentionally to annoy you. It's not on.

There’s a long history of encroachment, putting stuff on my property, parking issues etc. I had resolved them all without any formal escalation and thought things were fine but then he started doing this which makes me wonder it’s some kind of revenge for taking control back of my space.

Well I know the sort, he obviously enjoys the control and attention. Have you ever managed to go to your door while he’s doing this and just stare at him? No words just look at him, they sometimes don’t know how to react to that. How have you resolved past issues and how far are you willing to go to fight him?

Go out and water your planters every time he is there with his bloody boots.

I think you are spot on he definitely has some kind of superiority complex toward me. Previous issues were solved by combination of talking, calmly explaining the impact then when that didn’t fully stop it, I put some things in place to stop him physically being able to use my property. Things were good for a while but now this. I will try going out when I see him next doing it. Probably half the problem is I don’t assert myself as I could now I know I want to move anyway I don’t want to escalate things to any formal issues. Equally I want us to come to an agreement about respecting boundaries for the next person who lives there. I will catch him next time and speak to him as there is no way he can deny the mess he’s making when it’s visibly being done

It's infuriating.

I'd hire some big scary blokes to have a "talk" with him. Seriously. Do you have any nephews or sons of friends or ??

So tired of obnoxious arseholes disrespecting middle aged women.

I wish I did but I have no friends locally at all or family - I travel to see friends usually and my friends are all female. I’m single which i think is also a factor. His neighbours on the other side have always been male and he always has given them space

@NatureLovingWalks you seem to have the right strategy for the situation, especially if you are planning to move. No official reports and just gentle confrontation when the issues are in progress. He’s slamming his boots together getting mud purposefully on your side, you appear and say “morning, you alright, what’s all this mud over my doorstep” then stare. Luckily he doesn’t sound like a danger, but definitely an oddball.

@CaptainMyCaptain that’s not very nice. Would you like that being done to you?

YANBU. He’s doing it as a big FU.

YANBU.

I'd just be a petty bitch and do the same back to him and fling mud up his front door.

That would irritate the hell out of me. Everyone that comes through your front door is going to tread mud and unnecessary dust into the house.

I'd start a vigorous replanting of my containers and return the favour. Tempting to power wash the space every time and leave him to clean up the splashback.

Thanks everyone I cleaned up this morning rinsed off what I can and the bits close to my front step I’ve brushed over to his side. I’m also going to look into a privacy screen of some kind and will explain why I’m doing it when I let him know my plans. I think taking postive action to limit mess is all I can do to get the message across and show I’m not accepting it. This has been the way I managed to reclaim part of my land back last time. I know it’s not the worst neighbour in the world but it’s one of those things the boundaries get further and further pushed and start to grind you down. So just going to quietly take steps to get the message across. Thanks

😂

Something like this might stop him and you can have a pretty climber on it
monkroyds.com/the-bistro-trellis-planter-2139-p.asp