Cycling obsession

[Youcannevertell]

Is just this really. I stay home cleaning the mess he left after cooking lunch on a Sunday afternoon and he just leaves without previous warning that he's spending the rest of his afternoon cycling. This is a recent hobby but it's taking over family time really as we are working parents with a toddler. I might be incredibly unreasonable for feeling angry and frustrated but words were exchanged and I think he is so selfish! We just had a nice lunch, drank some wine... We planned watching a Christmas movie with our DC but clearly he had a better plan in mind. This hobby brought some tension between us as he goes for hours at a time during the weekend. Childcare ends up relying on me for DC activities on weekends but when I am responsible for school runs 5 days a week I just need a break from it all. I wonder, am I the only one here with this 1st world problem? lol

The problem isn't so much the cycling, it's the lack of communication and the uneven division of work with the kids. You need your own time too!

If he goes cycling for three hours then have three hours to yourself at some point in the coming week

Is he going at times that you’ve both sat down to discuss and agree are family times, or you times?

Having dated a MAMIL, I now pretty much equate cycling with gaming and refuse to date a guy who participates in either. It's the constant time away, the collection of bikes and parts all over the living room, the amount of money spent on the hobby and droning on about the superiority of Italian bike frames. The turning point in our relationship was a day when he used my fabric shears to fix a puncture. That was the last straw.

The turning point in our relationship was a day when he used my fabric shears to fix a puncture. That was the last straw.

This I can relate to, an unforgivable imposition!

This

I agree it’s about the unfair division and him making the assumption you will just be there to look after kids. If he looked like he is off cycling I would grab my coat and say see you in 3 hrs I am off cycling.

Though the fact it is cycling would doubly piss me off though.

How do you think he'd feel about going cycling early mornings if you suggested it? My DP loves going on long rides but he usually is out at the crack of dawn and home for breakfast time, so its not disruptive really. I encourage it because the exercise puts him in a great mood and he loves it. Both of us having some time to exercise at the weekend is important to me. It has to fit in with your lives though and you both have to be on board with it. I would be cross in your shoes.

Same here, he goes out very early in the morning in the spring/summer so back by the time the rest of us are awake and moving.

Well... That was his initial idea, and he goes in the morning but not early really. If raining he will postpone it accordingly to the forecast. I never thought he would be one of them ... He always complaint about groups of cyclists slowing the traffic. I also find it quite dangerous as I know someone that got killed on an accident (although he was the one crossing a red light).