To think I support up my autistic child for conversations?

[NotColdNotFrozen]

I’ve an autistic son aged thirteen who is at a special school for autistic children. The other kids at that school often struggle socially and he is clearly craving some social connection. He doesn’t really have a lot to say either. I honestly think he doesn’t know what to say.

AIBU to think that getting him experienced in different things and bringing him to cinema gives him some sort of topics to discuss?

Has anyone got ideas about how to tackle this?

Does he know how to make small talk and want to do it and have the vocabulary for it?

Going to experience things will increase his vocabulary of things to discuss but he may need scaffolding to help him formulate his sentences.

Can he physically talk and have the mouth and tongue coordination?
Can he use a tool / app etc to speak for him?

I'd hope you are taking him places even if you need to access accessible session and modelling conversation about the event afterwards even if you aren't getting anything back.

Often friendships / communication between autistic individuals doesnt follow the same pattern as NT people but if they have a shared interest it may spark conversation.

He has a great vocab but a bit of a stutter. I haven’t been taking him so many places recently. I did this when he was younger and it boosted his communication skills massively so good point.

Why haven't you been taking him places?
Does he get stressed, dysregulated or aggressive?

In which case you might be able to contact venues and ask for a familiarisation visit before you go properly.

Our local theatre does both a video tour you can watch at home and then invites people in and shows them around the theatre, let's them feel the seats and sit in different places, look at backstage, have a play with the fly stuff and spend time with the sound and light people and they offer inclusive performances of things so moving around or noise from the audience isn't an issue, these performances often have quieter sound effects etc

Our local independent theatre also does similar.

Have you looked at the library the often do groups which attract the ND like Lego clubs or if you have a board game cafe around.

Also, find Kaelynn_vp on social media, she is an autistic autism therapist and shows some great activities and strategies you may find useful.

what are his special interests?
my autistic son likes to watch his favourite tv shows with me and then we have a conversation about what our favourite bit was.
when I pick him up from school we listen to funny songs from the show and pause and talk about the show some more…..
sometimes we relate this to real life. We talk about the characters and why maybe they acted a certain way, their emotions etc.

does he get speech and language support at school to help him learn about conversations and social interaction?

it doesn’t have to be high brow stuff (going out to places is very demanding and overwhelming for my son so we have to limit it).
I think a lot of his conversation and language skills have come from reading and he loves being read to - but it’s very much learning/copying phrases and crow barring them into conversation (not always appropriately) but that’s ok.

The best advice I can give is to use whatever interests him (even if it is boring to you).

My niece is autistic and pretty non verbal (she babbles a lot though). She has a few phrases and does repeat stuff she's heard on TV (which can be embarrassing as one was 'why do you hit me' - no one has ever laid a hand on her)!!! She's 14.
My sister takes her out all the time. It's not always a success, she doesn't like the abrupt temperature changes nor crowds and she has some physical disabilities, but she goes to movies, to restaurants and walks. She goes to church. This doesn't help her verbal skills but the more exposure to life surely is good, as long as it doesn't distress them.

My time is limited plus he is at the age where he likes to stay home!