Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

selfish behavior

29 replies

ThelittleBee · 28/11/2024 03:46

DH and myself don't have any kids, but we do have a puppy. I work shifts and all I ask is that DH comes home from work on the days Im doing nights and walks the pup so I can get a couple hours sleep before my nights. Lately he has been late from work and says things like 'will be an hour or so late, busy day'. However he returns home in his gym clothes and when I confronted him about the fact I have been averaging 4 hours sleep over the last three days because I cant sleep with a yapping puppy in his pen during the time I need to grab a couple of hours he lies. Yesterday I called him out when he was 2 and a half hours late and said that I saw him car at the gym while at the shop
(calling bluff). He got mad and said he had only been there for 5 minutes and came strait home which is a blatant lie. We both enjoy the gym and find its like therapy for us but I have barely had time to go due to having to pick up pup and juggle shift work. I told him I found it completely selfish that he finds it more important to get a work out in and lie to me about being at work then the fact that I am totally sleep deprived and also have to get up again at 11 after finishing work at 7am. He didn't apologies, and has gone as far as calling me petty when I today told him he can take the dog to work (He has an office the dog can stay in) and drop him back off on his break as I will have more sleep. I feel like my needs are being put on the back burner because he wont sacrifice a couple of days of gym when I am exhausted. The alternative would be for him to go early but he wont do that as he stays up playing games until late. I am lucky to see the gym twice a week while the pup is so small and yet he still managed to go 5 times a week and gets a solid 9 hours sleep a night. I don't want to go mad because he just shuts down but I want him to understand my side.

OP posts:
Spondoolies · 02/12/2024 18:34

Dump him, he is selfish and a liar. Doesn’t really matter the circumstances tbh.

Electricalb · 02/12/2024 18:37

You married a deeply selfish prick whom has just given you a real taste of the real him.
He can't even share the load of a pup.
He doesn't care less if you sleep or not.
All that is important is that HE sleeps and HE gets to go to the gym.

Swap that with a baby and it will be EXACTLY the same.
He simply doesn't care and resorts to name calling, by calling you "petty" by pointing out that he is a liar to boot.

You have married a very selfish man.
If you think things are difficult now..... be foolish enough to have a child with him and you will know real misery.

THIS is who he is.
Return the pup, he clearly has zero interest in its well being, and the pup deserves owners that BOTH care about it.

Think about loosing the husband while you are at it.

LisaD1 · 02/12/2024 18:43

We have dogs and the puppy stage is hard work. It’s even harder work when your “partner” is a lazy, selfish, arsehole- which frankly sounds like what you live with.

If this was a joint decision then I’d sit him down and calmly tell him to shape up or ship out.

regardless, he doesn’t love the puppy otherwise he would care for it. He doesn’t respect or care about you either otherwise he would care for you.

what does he bring to the relationship? I’m going to guess he’s generally selfish.

AmandaHoldensLips · 02/12/2024 18:46

Thank god it's only a pup and not a baby.
At least you now know that you'll be the nominated default carer for any other living thing.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page