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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Wedding photographs

3 replies

NavyFox · 26/11/2024 19:31

Hi, it was my sisters wedding recently. It all seemed to go well. The next day she messaged me asking for photos, I sent her 15 and they were not brilliant . She was really upset with me and said they're rubbish. That nobody had taken photographs of the wedding. She did have a photographer and she has since sent some previews which are lovely but I think my sister wanted to see some straight away from family/friends. She said she kept checking FB and there was nothing. I felt super bad and guilty that i could have prevented that. She took loads at mine as did others. I took lots for her hen do and when her baby was newborn. At the wedding I had jobs to do and was poorly with a heavy cold (aswell as being pregnant). I had her baby to look after all day and night and he was good as gold . But it was alot for me as I don't have kids and never looked after a baby before - again my anxiety was high incase i messed up and really wanted to do a good job. I guess I spent all my time worrying and looking after him , perhaps too much as I could have asked others whilst I took some photos. Also suffer with GAD which brought it's own problems. On top of that she asked me to dog sit so I went to her house twice to check the dog was ok as he doesn't do well in kennels and he dog sitter let down. Since she had a go, my anxiety has been through the roof. I feel she has been harsh and I have been very upset that I've tainted her wedding in a bad way by not taking enough or decent photos. If I'd of known how important they were I would have taken alot more - I feel very bad.

OP posts:
Globetrote · 26/11/2024 19:37

Your DSis is very unreasonable- it’s not up to guests to provide her with wedding photos - that’s what you pay a photographer for. It’s nice if guests do have some good photos for her to see, but she has no right to get upset if they don’t.

Plus, you were looking after her baby, you are pregnant with a heavy cold, have GAD, had to go and check on her dogs twice during the wedding - and she’s really upset because you weren’t playing amateur photographer too? She needs to get a grip.

SummaLuvin · 26/11/2024 19:45

If she wanted guest pictures she could have/should have encouraged that with a sign saying "please take photos and tag us on Facebook" or even facilitated it with cameras left on each table. I get that maybe she didn't think and in hindsight is disappointed but thats not your fault.

In my experience more and more people are choosing to have 'unplugged' weddings, so taking of loads of photos could be considered rude. And in my circles it's definitely considered a bit of a lapse of etiquette to post many wedding pictures (especially ones including the wedding party) on social media before the couple do so themselves. I would suggest for her to write a note in her thank yous to please send her any and all photos they have - sooner rather than later before people start sorting and deleting from their camera roll!

ElsaLion · 26/11/2024 19:49

Your sister is being unreasonable. If she was expecting guests to take photos of her wedding day, why didn't she mention it to you beforehand?

When we married, we asked our family and guests to download and share photos of the day on PhotoCircle, alongside having a professional photographer. Some of the photos that were taken and shared were amazing and humorous, and have created lasting memories for us. Your sister could have easily done the same.

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