Does your Adult DS's in 20s want kids?

[gnogswe]

I you have DC in their 20's what is their opinion on having children?

My dd (21) is adamant she doesn't want them .

My DD and DS didn't want them in their 20's and now don't want them in their 30s either! It hasn't changed. Obviously for some people it will, but I do think there's a bit of a shift now in that younger people see more options in life than going down the "traditional" route.

Ds (22), yes - but when he has made his fortune and can afford them (his words).

Ds (18), no.

No, but to be fair, I was the same at their age, living in the here and now.

If you had asked me this question when I was in my twenties, I would have said "no".

A couple of decades later, I have more than average, and am very happy that I changed my mind!

DS is 25, wants children for sure, but hasn't yet found the right person who also wants to

Mine are worried about the cost , the impact on their lives and bringing more people into the world . My daughter claims she is too selfish ( she is ! ) . My son worries he wouldn't be a good father - thanks ExH . I am sorry as I would have liked grandchildren but that is their own business and their own choice to make.

I have two grown up boys in their mid to late twenties living away from home, it has never entered my mind to ask them. I want them to enjoy themselves at this stage in their lives and make the most of not being tied down.

That's good though.
It's not the be all and end all having children and getting married etc.

If it was there wouldn't be so many split ups and divorces.

In my early twenties it was a ‘nope’, a decade later and I’m on baby no. 2. Although I do miss the freedom of child free.

My DD is 20 and yes she wanted children so we have a little granddaughter now 🥰

Both my boys (21 and 24) talk about wanting to be fathers one day.

Yes, all mine do, but it is a vague "sometime in the future" wanting, not a 'wanting them now' thing.

I think there is a HUGE difference between a 20 / 21 year old and a 28/29 year old too.

Dd 24 hell no she wants no children she is having a good life I can't see it changing maybe she will live in a place of her own she currently lives in a house share but apart from that I can't see it changing

I don't have children because, while I wanted them in my 20s, I've changed my mind by the time I was 30. I do have a lot of cousins in their 20s and some of them want kids, others don't. Middle cousin just announced they are expecting. His wife and he are both 25 and I remember them saying just a few years ago that they don't want children yet. But then I also remember his wife saying she didn't want to get married two months before he proposed.

Nope.

DS and DD both 24.

Having known a lot of young men who are now older men, I think that a lot of young men are reasonably ambivalent tbh. They have vague ideas about possibly being fathers at some point in the future, but no fixed plans, and not a lot of motivation about it. If they find themselves in a serious relationship with a woman who really wants and drives having children then they end up having children; if they’re in a serious relationship with a woman who doesn’t want children then they’re perfectly happy with that. Unlike many women, they’re much less likely to make an active decision about it. That’s the overwhelming pattern among the men I know and have known.

My ds (23) says possibly , my dd (21) says no way.

DS (22) is adamant that he doesn't. DD (20) would like but has issues that make carrying her own unlikely. DS is somewhat influenced by my 5 year old nephew being an absolute pain. I'm assuming he'll probably change his mind or meet someone. I'd always assumed I'd have them (as did DH) but didn't actively "want" them until late 20s.

Some will, some won't, OP. But ultimately it is their choice, and nobody else has a right to comment on that choice.

I have two sons one of whom wanted children in his twenties and one of whom was adamant he did not. I am now the proud nanny to 4 grandchildren, each son has two children. Fear not. X

My mid 20s dd is not sure-although her partner does. Early 20s ds does. So does his partner- and they are long term planning.

My eldest defo wants kids, she is 29
My middle had a baby at 23, no plans for any more (at the moment)
Youngest is late teens and says she defo wants kids at some point.

I have absolutely no idea, and no intention of asking.

Fairly obviously no time soon, anyway, with career being built, housing costs etc.

DD (now in her 30's), has never wanted children.