AIBU re: Roblox

[PhoenixFireBum24]

Name changed for this.

AIBU to think 6 is too young for Roblox?

I found out today that, when my DC (twins, aged 6.5) have been staying with my ex, he's been giving them pretty much unrestricted access to gaming, mainly Minecraft, but also Roblox. And, also letting them access YouTube (he says, only cartoons, but on 'normal' YouTube, not the children's app).

I'm pretty ignorant around gaming and tech stuff, as it's not something I've ever really been into, and I've only really seen in passing articles/concern around Roblox. I've heard of parents lamenting their children getting obsessed with Fortnite (a gaming platform?), but I'm generally...clueless.

Whilst I can't control things that occur when they're not with me, should I be talking to my ex about this, or let it slide?

My DD really got obsessed with Roblox and it's such a waste of time. I wouldn't like it as it's such lazy parenting

Roblox is not censored, rather self regulated so someone could put up harmful stuff...likely going to be reported and taken down but at that point the stuffs already on there and cannot be unseen. The same goes for YouTube Kids...normal YouTube will have lots of inappropriate content...not only boring for a 6yo but also could contain harmful stuff. It depends whether you want to address this or not, it might be a tricky conversation to be had as many stir up status quo with other children in the house. Minecraft is absolutely fine but only if playing offline.

I would absolutely not let my dc anywhere near roblox. I'd suggest you do some research in to the dangers of roblox and Minecraft. A simple Google will bring up very worrying news reports.

Please read up.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-gloucestershire-68616730

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2024/oct/15/roblox-allegations-ofcom-online-safety-act

https://www.mylondon.news/news/south-london-news/despicable-paedophile-groomed-child-8-28944846

I hate Roblox, but I think a lot of the bad press about it is easily ignored/dismissed as paranoia, so a lot of people do let their primary school DC play it. I suspect for that reason, talking to your ex won't do much good and I would not bother, in pursuit of picking realistic battles with an ex. I would just keep it banned from your own house. Then he can suffer the horrors of trying to drag them off it and you won't have to

I like Minecraft, although agree at 6 they need to play offline. Mostly my dislike of Roblox is because it's 99% garbage. It's basically the "youtube" of computer games. Anyone can put up whatever they want on there and the most successful things that get shared/played the most are clickbait, addictive, weird, annoying crap. Just watching videos of it sends my kids hyper (I keep trying to ban all of these as well but my DH doesn't agree so hey ho).

This is concerning. At best, he's dumping them in front of screens rather than parenting them. At worst, they could be accessing all sorts of things on YouTube if they're not being supervised. Roblox is a definite no. Even if they're on the safest settings there are ways for them to see and talk about things which are absolutely not age appropriate. If they're on Minecraft or other games, I sincerely hope he's not letting them join online games or servers. My 16yr old has been in online games on Rec room, Fortnite and Minecraft where he's had to leave when he's encountered very young children and, on the same games, creepy adult men saying things and using language which was shocking and disgusting. I work in a school and have had to report conversions with children to a safeguarding lead. Meetings with their parents/carers were required. These children have used very inappropriate language which they have heard on online games or expressed fear/distress about something they saw on YouTube which upset them. Video games and streaming technology can be used safely and the NSPCC website has online safety information but you need to speak to your ex before you get a call from the school.

My just-turned-7yo became obsessed with the idea of playing Roblox a couple of years ago after watching videos on YouTube Kids. I didn't realise until too late how awful the YouTube Kids algorithms are and how ineffective the age-appropriate content management is.

You only need to watch a few videos to see how violent and sexualised it is. It's pretty horrific too - genuinely caused my DS nightmares.

Anyway, we decided offline creative-mode Minecraft was much more appropriate and have done everything in our power to redirect his interest. It seems to have worked.

We worried that a full ban would lead to him watching in secret at MIL house, for example. He still has Roblox videos pop up on his YouTube (it's pretty unavoidable), but he also tells us and we watch with him if he's really interested - redirecting and explaining when it contains content unsuitable for children, which is probably 90% of the time.

Nope, it’s too easy to get caught up in private messaging and private servers on Roblox, even the tightest settings you can still access things I’d not want a 6 year old seeing. It’s blocked on everything in my house.

There is no way in hell I'd let my kids play Roblox. YouTube isn't great but at least they're unlikely to be groomed there.

@beautifulbrothers Offline creative-mode Minecraft is a great idea as an alternative.

The problem is a lot of inappropriate games that look like they are for kids! Anything with Internet access should be a straight no at this age (particularly roblox which is totally unsafe for children)

Off-line Minecraft is a great suggestion.

Games by Nintendo are often good options for kids eg: Lego games, Mario (particularly Mario Party for young kids), Just Dance

I wouldn’t allow my children anywhere near Roblox. Wasn’t there an article exposing a group of men whose fetish was befriending young children on Roblox and exposing them to pornography and sex?

I wouldn’t allow children to access anything online where random adults can have contact with them. Because the adults that seek out that sort of contact with children will always be exactly what you’d expect them to be.

Since 2018, police in the US have arrested at least two dozen people accused of abducting or abusing victims they’d met or groomed using Roblox, according to data compiled by Bloomberg Businessweek. Some were already on sex offender registries or had been accused of abusing minors; there were also a sheriff’s deputy, a third-grade teacher and a nurse. In just the past 13 months there have been seven arrests, including those of a man in Florida accused of trying to kidnap a teen he played with on Roblox; a man charged with abducting an 11-year-old New Jersey girl he met on the platform; and a California man who allegedly abused a kid he, too, had met on Roblox. These predators weren’t just lurking outside the world’s biggest virtual playground. They were hanging from the jungle gym, using Robux to lure kids into sending photographs or developing relationships with them that moved to other online platforms and, eventually, offline.
www.bloomberg.com/features/2024-roblox-pedophile-problem/

YANBU

YANBU. I teach six and seven year olds and some boys in my class found and played a horror Squid Game based game when it very first came out. They were pretty traumatised and it had quite a bit effect on them.

It had other effects too such as parents coming to me asking me to stop their child playing with these two because they didn't want their dc led astray.

We allow Minecraft with any chat settings turned off. But it’s a no to YouTube and Roblox.

If you bring it up with Ex is he likely to continue because you don't like it?

Roblox has some pretty dark stuff on it. I had DD make me an account and play alongside her when she was into it during lockdown, and didn't directly see or experience anything nefarious apart from it being shit and a complete time suck she lost interest fairly wuickly.

Minecraft I have less of an issue with just have the chat turned off or don't play online.

I made a Roblox account and played with my daughter. After a while I let her play on her own. There are inappropriate things that go on but it’s probably rarer than people think, the worst thing I came across was some older kids that would come into a younger kids game and mess things up.

Thanks so much for everyone's replies.
I spoke to my ex and expressions my concerns and that I'd rather they didn't access stuff like Roblox and You Tube (I have to carefully word things, as don't want to poke that bear 🫠).
I'll have an open-ish chat with my DC this week about why I'm not going to allow certain apps/games/downloads (I have parental controls, set up by my tech savvy friend) at this time and why. My 2 don't like the word "no" - who does?! - but they're pretty reasonable when adults take the time to explain decisions.
I think a wider issue is that it makes me sad that my ex dumps them on tablets/tv and does very little active parenting.
You've all given me a lot to think about, so thank you.