Can’t go on like this

[Zd24]

Posting here just for traffic and because I just simply can’t go on like this and I don’t know what to anymore.
i have 3 kids the youngest being 13 months and my older 2 are 9 and 7.
so a couple of weeks ago I started feeling lightheaded ( not dizzy or spinning or anything just kind of like a woah feeling as if I was moving backwards when I was standing /walking ) it kept on going only when I would go outside and walk. I was putting it down to being sleep deprived for months on end and under a lot of stress as the baby has never slept through the night and not been sleeping ok for months and husband isn’t much help with this, plus a blood test in August showed I was slightly anemic( I had this re tested on Wednesday and my iron levels are now back to normal ) Last weekend I started having severe panic attacks out of no where when the ends of my finger tips started buzzing ( not tingling just a fuzzy feeling) I had a severe panic attack during the middle of the night when I woke up with the baby, I was down stairs for over an hour with a racing heart, couldn’t control or stop my body from shaking and I was so lightheaded and couldn’t snap out of it for over 1 hour. I eventually came out of it and managed to get back to sleep after a few hours but woke up the next day with muscle pains all over and an achy chest. from that night on I’ve been having 3 to 4 panic attacks daily for the last 1 week. I’ve always been a worrier and health Anxiety and anxiety in general but never suffered with panic attacks. I went to the doctors on Wednesday who agreed he thought all of this was caused by stress and anxiety and he prescribed me beta blockers and sertraline. I do have health anxiety so immediately when I took the medication I thought I was having an allergic reaction and started having a panic attack so I stopped taking them after the first couple of days. For the past 3 nights I’ve woke up in shock in the middle of the night and into a full blown panic attack. I’m shaky all the time and all day, I feel lightheaded all day, I’m scared to go out, I had a bad panic attack last night just eating my dinner. I’m scared for myself and for my children and that I’m dying, that’s how it feels. Can panic attacks really make you feel this bad? I’ve genuinely convinced myself I’m dying and that’s why I feel this bad. I’m scared to go to sleep because I’m expecting now every night to wake up in shock and into a panic attack because that’s how it’s been for a week. I don’t know what to do, I’m scared to take the meds, my health anxiety it’s telling me it’s neurological and I’ve got a brain tumor or something and that’s why all this is happening. I’m just so exhausted from it and just want to go back to normal, I’m having so many panic attacks daily. Can someone please give me some hope that this may go better? I literally feel like I’m dying. I’ve now gone into another panic attack today because my vision has been feeling blurry and weird for weeks ( I do need glasses for long distance but I never wear them) I just can’t go on like this it’s making me so ill

Then, if your stress is making you ill, why is the solution in your head to not take the medicine for stress? Take the tablets.

thank you all for your messages and it does help me reading them. I did take the medication in the end but woke up again at 1am in shock with a full on panic attack, it’s been like that every night for 5 days now. I’ve never woke up like that before my eyes just open from a deep sleep and it’s straight into a panic attack. I didn’t fall back asleep until 2am and now up early to get the kids ready for school. I find talking to my mom makes me come out of it so I was texting her at 1am and just crying telling her everything. It feels like this is getting ridiculous now and I keep telling myself that it’s getting ridiculous and it needs to stop. I’ve got 3 young kids and no energy for them and I don’t feel ok at all. To make things better I had an argument with my husband last night because I was over thinking again, I called my sister in law last week crying ( I am close with her) because I couldn’t take anymore after I had been in Sainsbury’s feeling weird and light headed and it just got to much, I just told my sister in law how I felt dizzy all the time and back pain and I haven’t felt ok for a long time health wise and that it doesn’t help I can’t get the baby into a good enough routine for her to sleep through and that I was really tired and that out of all 3 of them she has been the hardest baby, that it doesn’t help my husband ( her brother) is never home and I feel like everything has got to much and I feel like what have I done to myself. She made me feel better and then yesterday turned round to me and say “ why don’t you send the baby abroad with my mum for 3 months so your health can go better” I took this as the wrong way now that everyone thinks I can’t cope and that I’m blaming the baby for all of this when I’m not. I just put my trust into her and opened my feelings and now I’ve got it in my mind everyone thinks I’m complaining that it’s the baby’s fault, my husband said to me he told me not to complain about the baby not sleeping to his family and my health. I love my kids and I’m just finding it hard at the moment not that I’m blaming them for what’s happening to me. I just can’t believe she would even suggest such a thing that I send her away.

I feel your pain. Panic attacks are that bad. However! They are entirely harmless and you don't need to fear them.

Have a look at the Dare program, there's a Facebook group and I think the Kindle version of the book is free. It shifted my perspective and now I can cope much better with panic attacks.

Also, wrt the Sertraline, it's been a game changer for me. Hang in there, give it a couple of weeks with it. You're not crazy, or incapable or feeble, and you're going to be okay!

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Dare-Anxiety-Stop-Panic-Attacks-ebook/dp/B0158S7E1G/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?crid=2B4VX7UJLZOXG&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.2HkUKXAJxPoCmzR7HlxnxZkrLOI614poQOVBFAjrJvOLj-jAvhBU8eq-Qgo5lQCFVNJe1-q5aQpSrA4Vguh6tw.Pl6zJPpSWoVeTHJv7aK5Jdj5fIKoVXoOiMUApQRuZVA&dib_tag=se&keywords=dare+barry+mcdonagh+kindle&nsdOptOutParam=true&qid=1732518379&sprefix=dare+barry+mcdonagh+kindle%2Caps%2C77&sr=8-1

It's not free any more, but if you have a spare few quid it's worth it.

I felt a lot like you when my baby didn't sleep. I got terrible anxiety, dizziness, a range of aches and pains, headaches etc. I was convinced I was dying or there was something terribly wrong with me. I hindsight, I think I was just exhausted and burnt out for months and months, and it triggered bad anxiety. I googled "can you die from sleep deprivation, can lack of sleep cause a heart attack, does lack of sleep affect your physical health, cause a brain tumour" etc many times. I had a great GP who kept me grounded and encouraged me to take the sleep deprivation seriously and not just brush it off.

I also had bad side effects from sertraline but beta blockers helped calm down my panic attacks. Explain to your husband that you need some rest, no one can cope without proper sleep for a prolonged period.

I feel for you, the early years are hard, having 3 kids is relentless, and sleep deprivation?makes everything a million times worse.

OP, have you checked your Ferritin?

https://www.facebook.com/groups/theironprotocol/

This group is helpful.

That definitely sounds like vertigo. Really bad vertigo can give you anxiety because your body basically freaks out because it feels like you're moving when you shouldn't be. Wearing your glasses will help with the vertigo but you should also go back to the gp and insist on trying medication for vertigo

Did your panic attacks coincide with you stopping your iron supplements? If so, try taking your iron supplements again (the NHS threshold is extremely low, far too low for most people)

Please take the medication regularly, as prescribed. Not wanting to take it, or fear of taking it is actually the illness/anxiety speaking.

I'm so sorry you're experiencing this. Can I suggest that you look up menopause symptoms I had a lot of those symptoms when in peri-menopause. Anxiety, heart racing randomly waking me up, and dizzy.

Have you had your vitamin b12 checked? The dizzy feeling & tingly pins & needles in my fingers/hands is how I feel when mine gets low. I bought some tablets from Holland & Barrett & couldn't believe how much better I felt after taking them for a week or so.
But also yes- take the medication you have been prescribed, if in a couple of weeks it's really not working then speak to the gp again. Also I'd suggest an appointment to try & get something in place for your anxiety.

Hi @Zd24 This sounds very like symptoms I get, although mine have been much improved following retirement from my (very stressful) job, I first recognised I had them when I was pregnant with ds2 (27) although, if I think back, I can remember having vertigo type symptoms on a beach holiday in my early 20’s.

My symptoms have come in spells over the years. It can start with the moving floor, dizziness when I turn my head, turn over in bed or with a racing heart with lots of missed beats and the more I panic about it the worse it gets. I’ve had lots of tests over the years and nothing has ever been found. Retirement has definitely improved my symptoms so if you can get some help for your stress (I know that’s not easy) it might make a difference. I take fluoxetine for anxiety. I don’t know if that helps or not but anything is worth a try.

My two worst episodes, strangely enough, we’re both on holiday. The first, staying at my Mum’s when ds1 & ds2 were toddlers. My legs were numb or pins and needles up to my knees. My fingers and hands were tingling all over and I was convinced I was having a stroke or had a brain tumour. I went home early and saw my GP who diagnosed stress. I struggled to accept that but my symptoms had definitely improved by the the time I left the surgery. The second time was a caravan holiday, in the back of beyond, on my own with the 3 dc and no transport, when ds3 was about 15 months old. I had racing heart, ectopic beats and dizzy. I spent several hours all night googling and reading about people who have had these symptoms for 20/30/40 years and were quite obviously still alive. It definitely calmed me down and helped my symptoms. I have also gone to A&E on several occasions over the years as I’ve been so frightened that I’m having a heart attack or a stroke. I think this was made worse for me as my mum had a heart attack in her early 50’s with no risk factors and my dad died from a brain haemorrhage in his early 50’s. It actually blighted my 50’s which is a shame as I’m 60’s now and still here!

So, I’m sorry this is so long and all about me but I’ve had it for at least 27 years, it’s better now than it’s ever been and much to my surprise, I’m still alive. It does sound as if you’re symptoms are also caused by stress and anxiety. Definitely take the medication, wear your glasses and if you think the panic attacks are getting worse, go back to your GP. See if you can get help with your stress. Another poster mentioned the menopause. I don’t know if you are anywhere near that yet but it’s a good call. I can see now that my symptoms ramped up just before and during this. I didn’t take anything for this but dsd had similar and she’s had a lot of relief from HRT.

Wishing you all the best going forward. I hope you manage to get the help you need because it is a really horrible thing.

Have you found food or drink helps/makes worse your symptoms?? Have you got a blood glucose monitor?

Panic attacks, left untreated, ruin lifes

Up your vit D and iron intake.

If your symptoms disappear after talking to your Mum....panic attack for sure.

Love this. I always ring my mum when I'm feeling panicky. She somehow knows exactly what to say.