AIBU to think my mum is controlling with me and my son?

[keke2605]

Long story short I (27) have a 1 yo son.

My mum helps out a lot as the dad isn’t involved.

Today she had a play date planned with my son and her friend who also has a young son, to a play area.

Last night I stayed at my mum’s house with my son. Through the night my son started with a fever. He was hot and he was tossing and turning all night.

This morning he was hot again and I’ve given him medicine. He’s ok in his self but is still not quite 100%.

I said to my mum that I would prefer him to come home with me and rest instead of going out to play with kids. She’s completely gone off on one on me saying how the day was planned and payed for and that the other child was excited to go with my child.

Long story short, she’s taken him when I wanted to take him home. I’ve tried to get into the room to get my son and she’s blocked the door. She told me that my son isn’t unwell and that I was keeping him from having a good time.

Even though she does a lot for us I really think that she tries to take over my parenting and it’s really concerning to me.

Are you serious? I would have called police. So she has taken your child off somewhere without your permission? Can you call police now,

At very least go and get him. Then go NC with her, she sounds dangerous.

I hope you're OK, @keke2605 ? And listening to the excellent advice on this thread. Please take this seriously and set strong boundaries from now on.

For context to my earlier post, I'm the Grandma. I do a lot of childcare, on my own, and have a wonderfully close relationship with my adored toddler grandchild but as soon as my DD or baby's DF arrives, I'm straight to the background, with zero say in how they parent. Which is as it should be.

It's time to have a serious talk with her and set some boundaries. And you must make sure those boundaries are kept by being firm.
No one should ever block you from taking your child. Absolutely unacceptable behaviour and you can't allow this to happen again.
She is not his parent, you are. What you say goes, each and every time!

She sounds unhinged.

Lov the thought of "carpool" bringing temperature down🤣. And no you don't need a doctor for a short history of a fever and nothing else.

Wow!

Who the hell does she think she is, blocking you from your own child?

Really really overstepping there. She's not his parent. You are.

You need to asset yourself really properly.

And your poor ds. Unwell and dragged off to play.

How is he now?

Talking to her probably won't get you results.

A temperature isn't always a fever

That should be the last time she ever sees him.

She still views you as a child who needs to do as you're told, and accept that Mum Knows Best. She appears to have forgotten that you are an adult and a mother yourself.

Can’t have it both ways

I mean.. you can though?

Eh? Just because her mum helps out does not mean her mum has the final say on anything to do with the child and his welfare. What a ridiculous comment.

OP said the baby had a fever.
And a fever is a sign of a problem. There is no benign reason for a fever.
Your immune system may be able to cope with it. Or not. You may want to wait, but I would not take a child with a fever anywhere and watch them closely.

That is batshit behaviour from your Mum and I would be furious. I realise providing childcare is an enormous favour on her part but you're still the parent, and those decisions are yours to make.

This. What did you do after she ‘blocked the door’?