My 6 year old was at the top of the escalator

[Workinthemorning]

Shopping the other day with my 6 year old, she gets lots of treats, but has become a bit over the top about it recently, asking for things constantly in shops and not being happy when I say no. We were walking to go to the escalator to go downstairs, she was stopping at every window and begging for something. I told her to come on and she stroppily (not a word) came next to me. We went to go on the escalator and I turn around and she’s by the shop window and i’m heading down. She then wouldn’t get on the escalator alone and starts getting upset, but I can’t go up the escalator i’m coming down. Man is waiting to go on the escalator, seems very nice, I ask him ti please take her down and he does very kindly, i’m right at the bottom waiting and there are security outside shops etc.
I thanked him, he smiled and said no problem and off he went,
Thinking about it later I realised I could have told her to wait at the top whilst I went down and quickly then went up on the other one to go and get her,
What would you have done?
Feel bit weird/guilty about it

Don’t stress, your child was in your sight at all times. I had a child about the same age get on an escalator next to me that shouldn’t have. Her mum was at the top with a trolly calling to her. When we got to the bottom I held out my hand and said hold on, she grabbed my hand and I helped her off, then sent her back up to her mum. Most people don’t mind helping others. I hope the mum didn’t panic, but the kid looked worried. I had my work uniform on so having where I worked and that it was with children in huge letters in my back probably helped.

I’d be stopping the “treats.” It sounds like you’re training your child to be difficult and demanding.

Ah OP you panicked, it happens. I think our mum brains think to get our hands on them as quickly as possible.

To answer what I’d have done - Id have shit myself as I don’t trust escalators, and I don’t trust kids being around them. So I would have probably ran back up like some demonic Gladiator contestant - except about 3 stone heavier and 10 years older 🤣

What could he possibly have done between the top of the escalator and the bottom, while you watched?! Good grief.

I thought this was going to be asking for advice on how to deal with your six year old! That's the problem you've got, not that a kind stranger helped you.

I was once taking DD up and escalator and had a lot of heavy bags, she was about 2 and she put her hands on the glass which made her topple backwards, I panicked and tried to grab her while not dropping bags on the person behind me but he just said "I've got her" and grabbed DD and held on to her til we got to the top, I felt stupid that I'd not used the lift but the man was lovely and just helped me out when I needed it, I wouldn't give your situation another thought, the vast majority of people will help out a stranger when needed

No I wouldn't have done this. I wouldn't have stepped onto the escalator until she was in front of me. And no I wouldn't ask a random person ever to walk with her. We spend years telling them not to conform to strangers requests.

If the "up" one is right beside it I probably would have walked up it to her. But if it would have meant losing sight of her I would have done what you did.

helpful

That's very dangerous to suggest. Saw someone die on an escalator as a child and the image I've never forgotten. Op...total none issue you asked someone for help, they were kind and helped. You did everything you could. Let it go.

Yes, she sounds very spoilt, OP, and therefore ungrateful and demanding, you need to nip this in the bud and discipline her. You're not doing her any favours otherwise for her to act like this.

You had a problem, you solved it, everyone is OK.

Yes there are 100 other things you could have done. Run up the escalator is probably an unwise one because of other people. You could have got tot he bottom and pressed the emergency stop. You could have told her to stay. You could have called for security.

But what you did solved the problem.

It's fine most men are decent humans who wouldn't want to harm a little girl.

I would be more upset at your daughters behaviour. She's 6yo and shouldn't be doing that. It's dangerous for other people too. She would have got a firm telling off if it was me.

You handled the problem perfectly. Well done.

You did the right thing because that way she was in your sight the whole time and had an adult with her. Had you gone down and back up you would’ve lost sight of her and as she was unattended may have gone to look in another shop.

If you are concerned about the stranger danger aspect, it’s not quite the same thing as you were there, you instigated it and he also was in your sight the whole time.

Right in front of you in public, I can't see how there's any issue with that.

I’ve ran back up on escalators - non issue and not hard at all. If you know she’s like that, you don’t get on the escalator until she steps on it too. I always wait for my kid to get first on the escalator (while holding hands, he’s similar afar) for exactly this reason.

You sound like a lovely mum who is worrying that she put her child in danger, but you didn't. As parents we make split second decisions in the moment, and we used to be more of a community, generally speaking. As a pp said, many men are kind people, fathers, and he was presumably going down the escalator anyway so wasn't going anywhere. It wasn't like you asked a strange man to bring her home! :-) don't sweat it!

I would talk to your child about her expectations. One of my kids went through a stage of demanding treats and I told them that this was showing me that they needed a break from treats for a while. If she was refusing to come down the escalator to make a point, I'd be letting her know that she'll be taking your hand from now on. Don't let this turn in into a situation where she is trying to manipulate you to get what she wants. I'd come down quite hard on this or you will have a very large, annoying rod for your back in the future.

It can be tricky getting the balance right and being sure of our decisions but remember that

1. You're the adult
2. Having high expectations for treats isn't good for kids
3. You solved the problem in the moment

Don't worry :-)