To feel defeated with life

[OneBrightAzureBiscuit]

Hi,
just wanted some advice I guess.
im just feeling done with life- I have a history of severe major depression due to childhood abuse and bad life events. Recently my mental health has been stable and I’ve been doing so well but recently I took a knock. My sister and I were not getting on and when I distanced myself from her I received a cruel email from her telling me my life is a shortcoming etc and how my life is basically crap and hers is nice. It cut to the core as someone who feels like a waste of space a lot of the time. I thought I was over it after a few days but I feel deflated now. I’m lucky enough to have family, a loving partner and a best friend as the main constant in my life but I just feel like a small lone dot floating through life. I have no interest in much anymore, I’m sleeping all the time, hating everyone I come into contact with and just feel so alone and disassociated like I’m cut off from life.
Currently not working and feel like a loser cos I couldn’t work due to breakdowns and am now on the dole. Driving test isn’t til April next year. Just feel like life isn’t worth living. Don’t know if I’m having another breakdown/ depressed or I’m just not designed for life.
thanks for reading

I would suggest you not have contact with your cruel sister, at least until you are feeling better, if not permanently. What a bitch.

It does sound like you may be clinically depressed. Are you on any medication for it? You might want to try Wellbutrin instead of an SSRI, since SSRIs can increase fatigue, but Wellbutrin can give
you an energy boost. Talk to your doctor.
There's no such thing as not being designed for life. You're just going through a hard time.
Feel free to PM me if you need support. 🩷

Don't listen to your sister. She needs mental help.

You have some great things in your life, as you say in your post: family, a loving partner and a best friend as the main constant in life.
You are not a floating dot, you are an amazing person. Your family and partner would be devasted to know you are miserable and would move mountains to help you.

See your GP or regular doctor for increased care.

Thank you everyone for the lovely messages you’re so kind , bless you all xxxxx

You sound like you have clinical depression. Your sister sounds like a vile bitch.

I'm not a doctor but not sleeping and no interest in things sounds like symptoms of depression. I think you'd benefit from seeing your doctor.

Tell your friend, your partner and your family (not your sister) how you're feeling - they will help you.