Surrounded by idiots

[raksing]

I'm worried I could be the problem here but I just feel like I'm surrounded by idiots. How can I deal with this mindset. People frustrate me with their lack of common sense, work ethic, manners, self awareness. I'm working with people at the moment who just are not aware of how their lack of action effects others down the chain. It's boiling my blood. Am I alone in thinking other people are a nightmare.

Maybe your expectations of people are too high.

Or maybe you should find a job with a better team.

But if EVERYONE except you feels like the problem…

Other people are well aware of how their lack of action affects other people, they just don't care.

I'm not saying I am perfect by any stretch I have my faults. But do others also feel like this. I feel I have an extreme version of this mindset.

I feel the same.

I often wonder this. My husband said the same. People do the bare minimum as most people want an easy life. I'm not saying I'm some high flyer but I just can't get over having an email say in your inbox for a week that you need to action as it affects other people significantly. I'm wondering if it's ineptitude or laziness or both.

But to add. If a task affects them directly it seems to get done. I'm so over working with people like this but it seems to be everywhere!

I'm sure you're not. I'm sure you have colleagues who are equally irritated by you, albeit for different reasons. However if you're stuck with people it's usually best to try to focus on their strengths (I refuse to believe your entire team hasn't any strengths between them, or how would the business function?) rather than dismiss them all as idiots. Tbh it takes a particular level of arrogance to believe you are the only competent person amongst fools, and that's not a great trait either. So probably best if everyone worked on themselves first.

Can you give more context OP? People at work? Family? Friends?

I do think I know what you mean. I spent a not insignificant amount of time yesterday pinging emails back and forth to colleagues about “No we cannot take that text off the website as it’s a legal requirement as part of our XYZ terms and conditions. I know it’s wordy and jargony but we have to have it”
“oh but Matthew doesn’t like. Can we just take out the line that says “Blah blah blah”.”
Me: “No. like I said, it’s a legal requirement, and we’ll get into hot water if it’s not displayed accurately clearly on our website”.
”Right, but what about if we put the text onto a small image instead that people can click on to read? Thats still displaying the information but it’s not taking up so much room on the page”.
Me: “No that goes against accessibility guidelines. It has to be text that an electronic reader and Google can pick up on.”
”Why?”
Me: ”…Because it goes against accessibility guidelines. Like I said.”
”…but do we NEED it to be accessible?”

Honestly thank God I worked at home as I screamed “Fucking idiot” at the screen

Like I said I'm not perfect and I have my faults and I am aware of them. And I believe that a flaw of mine is having this mindset. I'm wondering how best to deal with it and wondered if others also feel the same.

My brain seems to always go to solutions quickly and I wonder why others seem to just pass the buck or avoid any responsibility totally.

This is a work issue. I only work in a very very small team so when other don't pull their weight, ignore emails, don't contribute equally the dynamic and balance is so thrown off. I always seem to be the one catching any spinning plate that falls and I am burnt out and exhausted by it. So I'm wondering how the fuck do I chill the fuck out and stop caring so much, like these other people seem to.

I feel the same as you (about 90% of the time).

I think you make a conscious effort to find their worth. So they may struggle with solutions, what do they do well? Is there anything they can do for you while you're problem solving for them? It's difficult without knowing the context you work in whether that's an option, but clearly you can't go round fixing things for everyone without anything in return. You might also want to think about your job and place in the hierarchy. If you're continually the one people look to for solutions, should you be higher up the ladder? If you're constantly finding that the way you'd do things is out of step with colleagues, and your manager isn't of the same mind, then you may be in the wrong job.

Thank you, this is very validating. I'm planning on leaving but I'm worried I'm going to find it everywhere I go so trying to fix this mindset.

Good posts from @5128gap.

I often feel the same. Some people lack self awareness in general. They always seem to lack self awareness when they are stood right in front of me in a supermarket blocking the way and completely oblivious to anyone else around them. I am always painfully aware that i could be obstructing a walkway so make sure i just don't do it, but some people seem clueless to anything else going on around them.

It used to happen all the time in the nursing home. I'd be doing a night shift on Friday night and working over the weekend and the nurses on during the week had repeatedly failed to get a GP to visit for X resident who was brewing a chest infection. I'd handed it over several times, but nobody had bothered. Even the care assistants would flag things up which would be dismissed or ignored cos......coffeetime, eBay bids, gossip, text messages from their auntie etc.

"Where the fk am I supposed to get a doctor from at 2am on a Saturday Sandra?" "Oh, it's an A&E visit again, with an ambulance and shitty O2 sats is it?" "Thanks, you gormless twonk!"

Happened all the time. Several lazy nurses as well, not just one or two.

Oh and they'd administer paracetamol to get rid of a high temperature to conceal the fact that X is ill.

Couldn't make it up.

Easy. You do your bit and stop monitoring what everyone else is doing. Once I sent an email to someone about their bit of the work, I forget about it entirely. I have no capacity to hold multiple streams and projects in my head. Unless you are a manager, it's also not your job. Something doesn't get done and you can't get on with your bit? Then you send a reminder or feed up the chain that you can't complete your part of the task as you are still waiting for XYZ. It's your manager's job to manage the overall team, not yours.
Only you can decide not to pick spinning plates. The reward for doing your job better than everyone else is almost always more work, not more recognition or money.