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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

15 year old talking to themselves

117 replies

Numberedout · 19/11/2024 17:38

Have name changed for this and am posting here for traffic.
I am wondering if anyone has any experience of this and could shed some light as I'm driving myself crazy.
I caught DD talking to herself in the bathroom. She's doesn't know that I was listening. It was a full blown conversation about stuff but I couldn't quite make out what exactly as there is a fan on in there.
I have family history of schizophrenia and psychosis from my dad's side and all sorts of things are running through my head.
She has always done this, even as a young child. But since the last couple of years I thought she had outgrown it but clearly not.
She has a few friends at school and seems to engage in family life ok.

OP posts:
LoremIpsumCici · 19/11/2024 20:15

I talk out loud to the telly all the time! I think I would only worry if I thought the telly was sending me messages/replies.

Smartiepants79 · 19/11/2024 20:16

I talk to myself all the time. It’s my way of processing and reminding.
I presume it’s either a conversation to her self or rehearsal of a conversation with a real person.
Not a chat with a person that she believes she can see or actually hear??

SwedishEdith · 19/11/2024 20:23

I'm talking to out loud now to an imaginary person about this thread. 😀 I think I don't do this in public but my dad used to and I've seen my sibling respond to his own internal conversation. I'd feel gagged if I didn't have this outlet so presume it is a processing or soothing thing.

Ineedanewsofa · 19/11/2024 20:26

I’ve always “vlogged without a camera” (talked to myself, talked things through out loud) for as long as I can remember! Stopped doing it in public as child and I realised it was ‘weird’ but have continued in private, usually in the car on my own. I have also won some cracking arguments with myself in the shower! No diagnosis but am an overthinker and if I know I have a tricky conversation on the horizon I rehearsing it is part of my prep. If there’s nothing else to cause concern then perhaps she’s doing something similar

NewGreenDuck · 19/11/2024 21:02

My son has autism and does this all the time. He's making sense of the world, reminding himself to do stuff, talking through the day. I just let him get on with it. It's not doing any harm.

housemaus · 19/11/2024 21:08

God I do this all the time too - fake conversations with famous people and what I'd say to them, being interviewed on imaginary red carpets, conversations I want to have at work as a way of running them through my head, pretending I'm one of those cleaning Tiktokers when I clean the kitchen to keep me from getting bired, all sorts. I'm glad it's not just me, hahaha - I always feel glad handsfree car systems are common now because if you pulled up next to me at the lights you'd more than likely see me gassing away to myself.

And for the avoidance of doubt, I did this as a teen too - not just an adult trying to soothe the stresses of adult life!

Sugarbeaches · 19/11/2024 21:19

I definitely process like this. I don’t even realise I’m doing it a lot of the time although I only do it if I think I’m alone- I would be really embarrassed if someone heard or called me out on it! Please let her process in private without listening in. I have no mental illnesses and can cope well with life (I think!)

SleepFinally · 19/11/2024 21:26

I.talk to.myself in the car where no-one can see me! I'm late 40s and have always talked to myself!! 🥴 (

DH talks to himself in the bathroom all the time!

Completely normal.

That said, I have a sibling with schizophrenia and I also have children so I understand your worries. I do overly worry sometimes my children will develop schizophrenia. But then I remember the trauma my sibling endured which resulted in his illness and realise my children have none of that, so I know they will be fine.

Your daughter is fine OP. Please don't worry unless theres lots of other symptoms 💐

Numberedout · 19/11/2024 21:35

Thank you everyone for taking time to reply 🌹💚

OP posts:
HarkALark · 19/11/2024 21:42

I'm not sure if other people have suggested this, and admittedly the age range is different, but my DD often pretends she's in a YouTube video when she's mucking about with her toys or playing with makeup. Might it be that?

hazelnutvanillalatte · 19/11/2024 21:43

Makingchocolatecake · 19/11/2024 20:00

A girl, same age, I used to teach would tell her to pull herself together, get a grip etc out loud when she went to the toilet. She was just very quirky and an extreme case of adhd.

My grandpa would do this, and just say other phrases and repeat things. It might have been due to anxiety/OCD (no one was diagnosed in those days but he def had a classic case and it runs in the family) or just a quirk

Vinni8 · 19/11/2024 21:47

doodleschnoodle · 19/11/2024 17:41

Maybe she's doing what I do sometimes when alone. Pretend I'm giving a radio interview about something Grin DH walked in to me once being interviewed by myself about my latest novel (that doesn't exist).

Yep, I do this all the time 🤣

Other than practicing for future interviews when I'm a world famous star, I never used to talk to myself until I had children. Now I narrate my whole day as I got into the habit when they were babies!

captureitrememberit · 19/11/2024 22:00

doodleschnoodle · 19/11/2024 17:41

Maybe she's doing what I do sometimes when alone. Pretend I'm giving a radio interview about something Grin DH walked in to me once being interviewed by myself about my latest novel (that doesn't exist).

This is so relatable😂

Sunnings · 19/11/2024 22:08

Two of my children do it as does my husband.
I can see him walking about in the garden having a chat on and off with himself. It is a form of self soothing and very normal.
They never do it around others. They are all normal sociable people.
Try not to worry.

Mountainpika · 19/11/2024 22:11

Talked to myself as long as I can remember. I'm 77.

okydokethen · 20/11/2024 09:21

Sure she wasn't recording? 'Get ready with me' type stuff?

rainbowbee · 20/11/2024 09:40

My mother has always done this. Apparently her grandmother did too, and if I hadn't stamped it out in me, so would I. No psychosis anywhere; however I think we all have autism.

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