Family Christmas - dogs, toddlers

[offmydesk]

Can't be too outing, I just want advice on how to broach the subject.

Brother's dog has history of biting, specifically their baby.

Family christmases before now, when we've all been together, the dogs have come too so they're not left alone.

I don't want my young children to be in a house with these dogs.

AIBU? How to ask if the dogs are coming/if the dogs are staying/say I don't want them there?

I would assume he’s bringing the dog then if he has in previous years? If it’s someone else’s house I’d say that I’m afraid I wouldn’t be coming (and say why) and if he’s meant to be coming I’d be sending a direct text to say he can’t bring the dog/s if he’s coming for the very valid reason of it being known to bite.

I think the big part you missed which may determine answers is whether you are hosting at your house or a guest in another family members house?

If it’s your house then sorry no dogs allowed, dog owners then can decide if they want to attend or not or if your a guest ask the host if dogs are attending and if they are say unfortunately you won’t be spending Christmas with them

I couldn’t be around a dog that’s bitten their baby so wouldn’t go to them if that’s the option or would state if the dog is there eg elsewhere or brought to your home that you won’t have that.

Honestly? I'd go nuclear and report the dog to the police as dangerous based on it biting the baby. Can't go to Christmas if it's staying with the police

You shouldn't be worried about your brother.
Just tell him you don't want the dog/s. Simple.
If he dosent come he dosent come.

@offmydesk I just wouldnt be going! say you have something else arranged! they are crazy to keepa dog which has already bitten their baby!!

It’s called „The cult of a Dog” where dogs are not trained,socialised and are allowed to do anything including biting.They come above everybody in the eyes of their owners.

@offmydesk where does the gathering takes place? If it’s at yours then state that dogs are not invited. If it’s at your parents ask them if the dog is coming and if so decline the invitation explaining why.

Better to have a fall out then deal with child scarred for life. Heck knows what might trigger the dog. It takes seconds for attack to happen.

Given the way your post was written OP, I'm going to guess that Christmas this year is at your parents house. In which case, you speak to DParents and ask if DB's dogs are coming. If their answer is yes then you explain that the dogs are too risky to be around children and if they come, you and grandchildren will be staying home for Christmas. DB will likely spit his dummy out and it'll become of case of your parents choosing between your children or his dogs. How your DB still has the dog beggars belief. In my world, if my parents chose a siblings dogs over my children, they would see very little of them in the future. My parents however are very reasonable people. You did refer to dogs in the plural in your post... obviously if you have any dogs, they cannot go either (it has to be fair).

I would be concerned they'd agree not to bring the dog and then arrive on the day with the dog anyway. If you think that might happen, I would make sure you have enough food at home (assuming it's Christmas Day and the shops will be shut) so you can easily just go home and make dinner for yourselves.

Crazy dog person here too and I completely agree with this. I love my dogs and I also host Christmas dinner, including family members with young children. My dogs go to daycare while the guests are here. I completely trust my dogs but they're still animals and I just don't want to risk it.