How would you feel?

[Timehop]

I am struggling with how I feel about this. I don’t know if I have put this under the correct topic so I apologise if I offend anyone regarding what I write.

I lost my father suddenly whilst suffering terribly with post natal depression following the birth of my baby 2 months earlier.

what is making me struggle is a comment that was made by another family member saying wished him dead in a conversation not even 24 hours after my father passing. I feel as though it was a massive kick in the teeth. I would give anything to give my dad a hug one last time but the comments really hurt. I understand that not everyone gets on with their parents. I sure had a few good run ins with my dad and fell out, but I would never have wished him dead.

i don’t speak or see this family member now, however other have been pressurising me to do so. Said family member has also stated that her comment was justified.

I'm so sorry you lost your dad. 💐

That person sounds awful. Can you avoid them?

Sorry, I feel like that was a little hard to follow, understandable as it’s a tough subject, but I am understanding it that she was talking about her own parent. Please ignore me if I’m wrong there! In that case, it was very insensitive to make that comment to you so soon after your fathers passing (I’m sorry for your loss) but I don’t think we should be trying to police how other people feel about their own parents.

I'm sure it wasn't nice to hear.
Perhaps they had their reasons. It's a harsh thing to say and there must be a story behind it.

Sorry for your loss

I'm really sorry about your Dad OP.
It sounds as though this is a really difficult time for you coping with that and your pnd.

People can say very hurtful things. When my next door neighbour died suddenly and tragically I broke the news to another neighbour who had been her friend at one point but who had fallen out with her. When I told this woman about my neighbour's death she actually said "Good, I'm glad she's dead". I couldn't believe that any one could be so callous and unfeeling and I was really upset.

Some people are just down right nasty.
Try not to let these unpleasant people get to you.

Oh am not policing, and there is probably more than likely a good reason to feel this way. It’s the insensitivity and timing to say these things that I struggle with.

am Normally the most laid back person and if the timing was different I would have shrugged the comment off.

It's extremely insensitive. Justified or not there's a time and a place. Having lost my Dad, I'd never cut contact with someone over a comment like this, however I'd always remember what a prick they were.