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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I’ve a bad feeling about this…?

104 replies

HerbalBovril · 18/11/2024 00:35

Have you ever experienced a moment/situation/circumstance wherein you had a “bad feeling”…almost a premonition of a terrible or tragic thing to come, only to be proved correct?

I’m not talking vagaries or coincidence…more akin to, “I’m somewhat petrified that I saw this coming, despite it being impossible to do so”.

OP posts:
ShakeUpYourTiredEyes · 18/11/2024 08:42

Quite a few times.

I've for example kne people had passed that I hadn't been in contact with recently. In April I just knew that a family friend had passed but nobody knew she'd been ill next day we got the news she had passed two days previous.

I don't /didn't get on too well with my grandad. He left my nan with 3 kids after an affair and lived quite far away with a new family so my mum and 2 uncles have 6 half siblings. My mum was in some contact but the half siblings even in their 50s still resented my mum (my uncles don't bother) but we're pleasant enough kn birthday and Christmas with a txt or call. My grandad had type1 diabetes but we didn't know he was having complications. In May I was thinking about him a lot really on my mind and this has never happened and I knew something wasn't right and had a feeling he'd passed away. I didn't greatly care for him but respected he was my grandad. Anyway 13th May my mums half brother turned up at her place of work to tell her their dad had passed away and his mum and siblings didn't want my mum to know. He had passed on 28th April and nobody had told her but I knew. That's another story about how vile they all are.

In 2012 I had a rta on the M6 no idea how I still here esp3cially with all my body parts working like they should. The day previous I just kept picturing the a&e at our local hospital and had a sense of doom like when you've been asked to go to a meeting in work and don't know what it's about I just felt that gut feeling that wad making me sick. Articulated lorry went into the back of me. Car flipped over. A man who happened to be a firefighter off duty came to me and was asking could I feel my legs? I was in hysterics laughing at the situation then suddenly busy switched and was like is my baby boy OK? I didn't have a baby and didn't know I was pregnant. Thought it was just the shock. 2 weeks later I don't a test and I was pregnant had to go for a scan and was only 5 weeks but I knew and he was a boy too.

There's other stories I won't bore you with. My mum and husband call me the witch because when I feel like that I tell either of them so when it happens they know I've thought it and I'm not just saying I had a feeling, I really dis have a feeling.

MaggieBsBoat · 18/11/2024 08:53

Yalta · 18/11/2024 05:00

On occasion I have passed by someone and this knoeledge they will be dead soon suddenly pops into my mind
These can be people who I don’t know but later I recognise their picture in a paper. Sometimes it isn’t through illness but by their own hand

I do have a very heightened sense of smell and I always wonder if my nose picks up some sort of smell from the changes in the body when someone is ill but even they do not know it or has decided to do something

I don’t think these things are just random but our brains sre picking up almost imperceptible signs that we have learned over the years to interpret

The problem is we would be vilified if we went up to a perfect stranger in the street and said go to a doctor you are ill when they feel fine

I do wonder this. I subconsciously knew my friend was seriously ill and asked him to go to a doctor. Turns out he had cancer and I just had a feeling. He died a few months later, but I’ve often wondered if I somehow could sense it in him.

user2848502016 · 18/11/2024 10:04

I haven't had a premonition as such but a few times "just knew" something, that I would explain by subconsciously picking up signs or my body being aware of something.

Like a few times I've seen a female relative/fried and "she's pregnant" has popped into my head, and they have been. I'm also really good at predicting a baby's sex (don't think I've ever been wrong actually) - can women subconsciously pick up other women's hormones maybe if they know them well?

When I was pregnant for the 2nd time I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks but that whole pregnancy I had a nagging feeling that it wasn't going to happen. Then I got pregnant again with my DD and although I was anxious I also "knew" everything was ok.

My 2nd pregnancy was also quite different from my 1st so I thought I was having a boy at the start, but I remember one day driving to work and this picture popped into my head of me holding a baby girl and I was like "oh it's a girl", and I did have another DD.

The strangest one was when my mum called me to say my gran had a stroke I knew what she was going to tell me before she said it. My gran had been well before and I had 4 grandparents alive then so strange how my mind went straight to her. Must have picked up on something last time I saw her.

mistymirror · 18/11/2024 10:11

When I was 18 my Grandma told me she was going to be having a routine heart operation, I can't explain the feeling but as soon as she told me I knew she would die. This gut renching, overwhelming feeling of 'she will die but I can't tell her because everyone will think I'm insane'
And I was right, she died during surgery.
That intense awful feeling that I assumed at the time was just anxiety was a real feeling. It's hard to explain when you feel something so overwhelming.

Skybluepinky · 18/11/2024 10:27

My mum, me and my daughter often do.

EternallyIrked · 18/11/2024 10:42

10+ years ago I was driving out my street headed to work and an ambulance drove past. I instinctively knew something wasn't right and followed it through my town and it stopped at my grans house. Unfortunately she died literally moments before we all arrived.

There was absolutely no reason for me to connect on some personal level with that ambulance driving by. It's not an usual situation to see one driving through my pretty large town. But on some level, some part of my brain said "where is that going? Follow it". Weird.

I have several such examples, actually. The women in my extended family are all quite spooky with stuff like that.

Snapandfart24 · 18/11/2024 10:48

Yes, countless times and rarely wrong. I'd like to say never wrong, as that's how it seems.. But realistically I will have forgotten the times it was nothing and won't know the times I changed my actions due to the feeling as I don't know the other outcome.
Too many times to list.
We have a sense we don't fully understand, maybe several, but the fact remains that you should trust your gut. If you have an uncanny feeling that something is bad, it usually is.

BillStickersWillBeProsocuted · 18/11/2024 10:51

potatocakesinprogress · 18/11/2024 00:55

It's always coincidence. You can tell because it only ever happens with things that are already pretty likely or certain to happen, and usually only in a vague sense, and you don't discount all the times you were wrong.

Having a premonition that Trump will be president or an old person will get cancer when 1 in 2 people get cancer in their lives is very different to having a premonition that cousin Billy will have a number one hit with a song about green pigs and as a result end up doing a concert in Vegas where he's sadly taken out by a wandering heroin addict.

I agree with this with a good dose of confirmation bias thrown in

For example when every my partner and kids are out at the weekend and they're later than I expected I always start to imagine the worst. So far every time they've come home safe and sound, but if one time they didn't it would be easy to say "Oh I knew something bad was going to happen" when actually I just always think that and this one time I was right

To be fair I'm sort of assuming that's all of us but it might just be me!

wasdarknowblond · 19/11/2024 18:28

Yes, one family member who passed too soon and a sibling that cancer.

Lollipop81 · 19/11/2024 18:47

I’ve had this happen a few times in my life. Mainly that a bad thing is going to happen, but occasionally a good thing. I’ve always been right.

Coffeemaniac · 19/11/2024 19:07

Yes, I didn’t get on one of those booze Thames boqts, as I felt suddenly terrified of getting on it, and a week later The Marchioness went down.

Nikkigriffin · 19/11/2024 19:21

Your fears are your defence mechanism.
I always trust a gut feeling and it's usually right. Common sense, past experience and life knowledge will keep you safer. Trust it.

Scutterbug · 19/11/2024 19:29

When I was young I was going to bed and I suddenly had this vision of a big boat falling on its side and sinking. I went back down to my parents and told them and they reassured me that everything was ok. They said boats didn’t just turn into their side like that.

The next day was the Zeebrugge ferry disaster.

Another one was my dad. He was on holiday in the USA with my mum and he woke her up in the middle of the night and told her I was drowning. She told him not to be so silly, it was just a dream, go back to sleep.

I was in Austria at the time. He picked me up from the airport a week later and I came through arrivals with a massive bruise on my chin and cheek and with a black eye. I had nearly drowned in a white water rafting accident.

It happened at the exact time he had woken up.

MagicFarawayTea · 19/11/2024 19:40

When I was about 12 I finally got a longed for puppy. We were all in the kitchen when I had a bad feeling and ‘saw’ white stuff falling from the ceiling. I insisted that the puppy was put outside the room; which was weird as I was besotted and had him everywhere.
Minutes later the light fitting dropped from the ceiling shattering glass everywhere.

Beenthroughit · 19/11/2024 19:49

I had a really weird premonition, just the one and it was about one of my inlaws who, to be perfectly honest, didn't like me very much, and I found them difficult to get on with. Only relevant to say it wasn't that I had any particular emotional tie to them. They were about to have open heart surgery, had started coming off their meds in preparation for it, and I suddenly thought the Op's going to be cancelled, and mentioned what if it was cancelled, and I was told no of course it won't be. It was a day later. It was rescheduled for a few weeks later, and I had no such feeling at that time. and it went ahead. I know my husband thought I must be some sort of clairvoyant, but have never had anything like that before or since. I did have an unforgettable experience some years later. It was a difficult time, I havae to admit but it wasn't anything to do with any of that. I suddenly woke up out of a deep sleep by sitting up, never had that happen before. I looked at the time, lay down again, normally if I woke up during the night and couldn't get back to sleep for a while I'd relax with a bit of checking my emails and basically boring myself back to sleep, but I thought just try and get back to sleep, as I'd been deeply asleep. When I woke up the next morning, I got up to get ready for something I was doing that day, and checked my emails over breakfast. At the time I woke up, one of the friends who was going to be coming with us, had emailed telling everyone that her son had been in a dreadful accient and had not made it. One of those things that will live with me, never told her, it was as if her grief was such it spread out , she lived in the next street

Ticktockk · 19/11/2024 19:52

Often. Weirdly on a couple of occasions I’ve known people have died or been very ill, and found out in the following days.
It makes me question my overactive imagination as I don’t know whether to believe myself or not!!!

JawsCushion · 19/11/2024 19:55

I dreamt my h was having an affair.

I dreamt he had met someone new.

Yep.

Zocola · 19/11/2024 21:00

Had this since a young child,used to terrify the life out of me,and i always appeared to be even more tuned in when I was pregnant,or the children were young..

Cindefuckingrella · 19/11/2024 21:32

January 2020. An impending sense of doom that something awful was going to happen that year. And that I needed to review my finances and save money. I had not heard of Covid at that point.

MorettiForMargo · 19/11/2024 21:47

I know I'll be mocked and I am sensitive about it but since I was a very young child, I've known things I couldn't possibly have known or even had an inkling about long before they happened. By 8 my parents were completely freaked out by me. I literally "see" things before they happen - anything from seconds before to five years. There's been a lot of instances over the years, too much to go into. I actually feel a bit embarassed and ashamed about it and it's not something I particularly like about myself.

I also want to point out that I'm a completely logical, sensible, rational person. I know it doesn't make sense and I wouldn't have believed me either.

Luckily, a grandparent was the same, their whole life and oddly things got more intense for me and my "knowing" after they died. Like I said, I'm embarrassed, I don't want to be mocked but I'll give a childhood example. Eight, playing in the garden. All of a sudden stopped in my tracks, overwhelming feeling of sadness and I said to myself, out loud, "oh no. Someone's died."

Felt sick and panicky. Ran inside panicking and saw my parents, who asked what was wrong and I just started crying and stuttering, "someone's just died". My mum thought I meant in the street and started to rush to the door to help. The phone rang pretty much 5 minutes after my feelings started, my Dad picked it up. He was being called into his business as a nice lady from work had just been found dead in the toilet. Very much unexpected.

And yes it could have all just been a coincidence but then something very similar happened again 6 weeks later and a few months after that and it just kept happening. Not just deaths, nice things too.

It did genuinely disturb my parents but my grandparent who had the same experiences just pointed out that in years gone by, I would have been seen as having a gift and would have been earmarked as one of the "see-ers" or "wise women" of the village in the culture we were originally from.

Now I'm older, I am a bit more open about it. I might speak up about nice things I know are going to happen, but in a jokey way and only with people I trust. Friends are both bemused and spooked.

One of my favourite moments was during our panel presentations for our MAs, we were getting called in at random...a group of 48 all waiting in the lecture hall to be called into adjacent seminar rooms. After the second person had presented, I turned to my boyfriend, squeezed his hand and said "good luck babe, deep breath and don't fuck up" and he said "why have you just said that?!". I said, "Cause you're next!". He said, "you can't possibly know that!". The door opened and our tutor said "James? You're up next!" and his face was a picture. After he came out, he joked and said, "you're next!" and I said, "No. Kate's next. I'm 7th." I was right. It was really amusing. He was convinced the module head and I had an inside joke going on.

I never speak about the frightening stuff. I have my own set of rules in terms of ethics with what I'll share, but I've got to the stage where I do speak about most of what I've seen with my parents. I have to as otherwise I feel like I'm going nuts! And I write some of it down.

I also suffer from anxiety and sometimes catastrophise so I try to hold everything lightly and hope I am wrong about some things. Occasionally I am wrong. I actually like that...it's less scary than being right all the time.

Anyway, I've probably succeeded in making myself seem utterly mad. In a way, I'd rather I was because I know there is no scientific/logical explanation. Nor is there any reason or purpose as far as I can see. Some of it, maybe, I tried to warn a very distant relative I'd not seen for decades that they needed to be careful as I'd seen something bad happen to them (I saw their family panic stricken and weeping over them but they were speaking in their first language which I could only partly understand) but by the time we got through on the phone they were already on the way to hospital after an accident - so if I'd just been a bit quicker I suppose the purpose could have been that I'd have been able to stop it and prevent it. But anyway...I don't understand it, didn't really want it and it causes me more stress than anything that's good about it. But it's just something very weird about me that I can't really stop.

BlueFlowers5 · 19/11/2024 21:49

I had a dream that saved me from a dire circumstance;

I went out for dinner with friends, a married couple. They were saying that the husband had a hypo earlier.

A few nights later, I was asleep and dreaming about that earlier hypo conversation. I said to myself in the dream, 'why am I dreaming about the friends hypo?'
What I believe was my unconscious answered;

'Because you are having one'.

I woke up and sorted it.

Pinkyandperkyofyesteryear · 19/11/2024 21:51

Very often; I once got into a car and suddenly felt very scared. A single thought was “what if we were in an accident” an hour later we were in an accident! I’m also funny about dreams. I once dreamt about my uncle being in a hole and I couldn’t get to him. I was on holiday in Florida so in a pre-arranged email I asked my mom if my uncle was ok. She replied yes however when I got home I was informed my uncle had been admitted to hospital. In a confused state he managed to walk out of hospital in his pjs and along a nearby dual carriageway. It took them hours to find him but somehow i felt I’d know he was in danger? Loads of others to tell too….

rocketgal · 19/11/2024 21:54

I have this weird thing where I can sometimes see things not happening. I don't know why so I can't predict exactly but I get this absolute certainty about things. Probably not making much sense but for example we had a family holiday booked earlier this year and I just had this bad feeling. I tried to talk myself out of it and thought I was just being silly so tried to envisage us at the airport, arriving in said country to visualise it but it would not come to me. This is somewhere we go regularly so would be easy for me to picture us there at our favourite restaurant etc but it would not come to my mind no matter how hard I tried. I just knew we wouldn't be getting on that plane. Husband got rushed into hospital the week before and we didn't go.

Oldnproud · 19/11/2024 21:56

I had a hallucination that I feared was a premonition.

It was daytime, I was on the sofa in the front room and I just happened to look out of the window, and I 'saw' a police car abruptly pull up right outside and two officers get out and come towards our gate.
Only it wasn't real, but it was so vivid and felt so real that it scared me - and with having two sons away at uni at the time, my immediate thought was that something had happened to one of them and the police were bringing terrible news.
That was it though, it all happened in a second or two and then the image just vanished again.

That night, I woke up in the early hours. Nothing unusual in that, but this time I felt the urge to go and look out of the window, which is something I never do normally in the night.
Within seconds of parting the curtains, a police car pulled up in exactly the way I had 'seen' that morning, except that this time it was real. The two officers got out, looked at our house then came to our gate. My earlier hallucination had ended at that point, but these officers opened our gate and started walking down our path. You can imagine how I felt at that moment!

I have never felt more relief than I did when, after a few more steps, they stopped, looked around, then turned around and headed towards another house.

Nevertheless, the two things really left me shaken. The similarity between what I had imagined and what then happened later was uncanny.

Mydogpongs · 19/11/2024 22:10

I always go with my gut twice in the last year i have felt something in my git and avoided going into work because of it. One of those times my child was sent from school after being injured and I would never have been able to there in time from work the other time there was a huge crash that would possibly have involved me due to tome and location. I know the universe is looking out for me.