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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for your opinions on this...

31 replies

Decisionsarehard · 17/11/2024 17:07

3 bottles of wine ( 30)
1/4l gin (10)
1/3l whiskey (13)
3 cans of beer (7)
Total = 60 units

Adult male, <40 years, runner, 220lbs.

Thoughts?

(Brackets and totals based on a very quick Google search. May not be 100% accurate)

OP posts:
Decisionsarehard · 17/11/2024 19:42

Didimum · 17/11/2024 18:41

I have absolutely no idea why people continually ask this question on this forum (and presumably others).

Can you not Google? Or are you hoping it’s somehow OK because it’s ’socially acceptable’ and therefore you don’t have to face confronting your partner (I’m assuming this is your partner) over being an alcoholic?

The recommended limit is 14 units a week. This is a consumption of over 42 per week. So yes three times the weekly recommended consumption on the regular means you’ve got one heck of a problem with alcohol.

It’s not a moral judgment, it’s a clinical recommendation based on increase of risk. It is what it is.

Edited

I’m not sure if you truly don’t know, but I’m happy to explain my perspective if it would help.

I think the value lies in gathering additional knowledge and insights. Instead of assuming your own habits or circumstances are normal due to limited knowledge of other households or routines—or relying solely on clinical, one-size-fits-all recommendations (which, to be fair, are likely well-researched)—you can quickly access a wide range of perspectives. Based on the above these can vary from extremes like "that's an alcoholic level!" to "meh, leave him to it." But overall there may be a consensus to the narrative. In just a few hours, you can gather diverse opinions, which can be particularly useful if someone decides to confront their partner or reflect on their own behavior. Real-world examples (in addition to Google results) provide a basis for arguments to either support or challenge these discussions.

It’s tricky to know how much weight to give the recommended guidelines, which can be an argument brought up by those who would defend their behaviour. For instance, BMI is often dismissed as too broad to be meaningful, and something similar might apply here. The recommended alcohol units remain constant regardless of whether you’re 18 or 80, weigh 112 pounds or 250, or have genetic differences that influence your susceptibility to alcohol’s effects. The book Gene Eating, explores how your ancestry impacts your response to foods and drinks. While the recommendations are rooted in risk reduction, how much of that risk is universal versus perceived? Adding to the complexity, the guidelines vary worldwide—some countries consider 30 or even 50 units per week for men acceptable. Societal norms can therefore play a role in helping people decipher acceptable behaviours (as far as they perceive them anyway).

That’s where this forum becomes incredibly valuable. It complements clinical facts by bringing together people from diverse backgrounds, ages, genders, and habits, offering practical, relatable insights. When used alongside expert recommendations, it can be a powerful tool for understanding behavior and making informed decisions and arguments.

Though I do apologise if this is a too regularly raised topic on this forum. Although perhaps even that adds weight to how useful the forum must be for those trying to guage what may or may not be acceptable within their own circumstances.

OP posts:
Wishfives · 17/11/2024 19:46

@Decisionsarehard so what was the point of this thread? That's a slightly random reply to @Didimum

Decisionsarehard · 17/11/2024 19:56

To answer other questions

Wasn't a holiday but did include a birthday which is where some of the alcohol came from (gifts)
No abuse, generally a very happy drunk
On affecting behaviour - generally no. Successful at work, get up with the kids in the mornings, complete half marathons. However had a teetotal month recently and did notice the difference in mood and energy.
Can afford it

OP posts:
Decisionsarehard · 17/11/2024 20:01

Wishfives · 17/11/2024 19:46

@Decisionsarehard so what was the point of this thread? That's a slightly random reply to @Didimum

Oh. I'm not used to this, sorry. Thought it made sense to me.

Was trying to say I have googled, am aware of the recommended units, but that doesn't feel like a full picture. When the response to knowing the recommended units can be 'yeah but they're recommended for everyone, from someone who is 18 and weighs 8 stone to someone who is in their late 30's, can handle their drink and weighs more than twice that, how does that make sense?', then it's handy to have more general opinions and experiences to discuss. Hence the thread.

Am aware the guidelines view it as too much, but being on here just for a little bit and people are already saying stuff like 'was it a holiday?', showing that there are times/moments when it might be more acceptable than others. It's nuanced. But was wondering if it was nuanced in a way where the majority would say that in their opinion it was okay, or not.

OP posts:
Downerthanishouldbe · 17/11/2024 20:01

It’s too much OP. I think you know that tbh.

statusquochangeneeded · 17/11/2024 20:07

Downerthanishouldbe · 17/11/2024 20:01

It’s too much OP. I think you know that tbh.

I feel like OP is gathering data for an argument yet to be had. Which unfortunately is probably a waste of time unless they're the person drinking the units.

OP if this is a partner rather than you then it's really not going to matter how much you point it out or which way you shape your arguement. They must surely already know that's a ridiculous amount. If they're not ready to face the facts or make the change then that's unlikely to change.

Echoing pp, I hope you're okay.

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