To think DH is selfish

[Stillhere3]

Weekends are the only time I get the chance to do anything as I get help from DH with the baby. Hes currently still in bed meanwhile I have a list as long as my arm of things to do. Sitting waiting for him to get himself out of bed to help with the baby which is draining and unmotivating. AIBU?

why Is he in his bed at nearly 1pm?

Does he pull his weight in other ways? What time does he go to bed? My DH lays in but he is a night owl and will sometimes be working until 1 am or later. Hard to vote without more info.

Why on earth is he still in bed? That’s rank.

He stayed up watching tv until 7am

Well, he's had 6 hours. That's more than I used to get when mine were babes.Go and wake him, give him his child, then get on with stuff.

He is failing to be a parent and he needs to shape up. You need to have a serious conversation about his lifestylse expectations.

Wake him up, dump the baby on him and say hee you go and crack on with what you have to do

Dh and I had a lie in each at the weekend until about 10.30am I think. Saturdays were his lie in because he worked the 5 days previous. I then had Sundays where he would spend one on one time with his child to help build their relationship without me being there as I was a sahm.

Stop using the word "help" with the baby, it is called parenting. Help implies it is your job and he "helps" you out. He is an equal parent. Don't fall into weekends being family time, you need time away from your baby and he needs one on one time with his baby.

Wake him up if you have things to do.

Yea wake him. I would have woken him at 8am. Staying up all night gaming/watching tv is childish.

You're unreasonable to sit waiting for him. Walk in, give him baby, leave. 4 hours ago would have been a better idea.

Staying up until 7AM?!! What on earth? Has he made any changes to his life since becoming a ‘father’?

Is this a once-off or typical?

If it’s regular behaviour, he sounds very disengaged from you and the baby. How’s the relationship in general?

Glad it’s not just me that thinks he should be up then. I do feel bad as he works long hours and the weekend is his only break however he struggles to see it from my POV and I feel all I do is cook, clean, tidy up after everyone etc.

He stayed up until 7am watching TV? and he has a baby at home? Fucking ICK.

Tell him to grow TF up. I'd have woken him up hours ago, take the baby to him and get on with your day.

Time to have a serious discussion about expectations, you have one child not two.

Fine for him to have a lie in until say 9am. 1pm is not okay. Yes he's selfish.

So he sleeps all day today.Then not tonight! Then he's tired all week.

Is he a teenager

Staying up watching tv until 7am = deciding that he wasn't going to provide any parenting today. It wasn't a neutral, or accidental thing, it was deliberately opting out of parenting. I'm sorry he is such a waste of skin.

If youre not going to wake him, I'm sure there is something you can get done from your list while baby is there so you do not need to sit and wait for him to wake up at least.

As soon as he is up, just leave. Do what you have to.
If this was a once off because he's having trouble sleeping or something, fine.
If this is something he does often, you need to seriously consider if you can stay with someone that selfish.

I do feel bad as he works long hours

What time was he at work yesterday?

Yeah that's unacceptable. Tell him he needs to get his arse in gear, the lazy shit!

Take the baby into him, and get on with what you want/need to do. Or preferably, give him the baby and a list, and go out

Get back to work asap or this is your life.
Don't have another child if he isn't pulling his weight with the first child.