Told friend to rehome her birds?

[Favtimeoftheyear]

Went round to my friends house last night and had a few glasses of wine. She made the comment that she’s thought about rehoming her birds as they are in the cage 100% of the time. She hasn’t let them out to fly in over a month. I said it was unfair for them to be in such a small cage all the time and that they need to go and spread there wings. Then she fired back at me say that they aren’t distressed and that they are content. She went all weird with me and the vibe was just off so I went home.

AIBU? I didn’t mean to cause upset it was just my honest opinion.

She said it first so total non issue. She's clearly touchy as she knows it's unfair on them.

Is she normally a responsible pet owner? If my friend was normally an animal lover and good with her pets I would be worried about her in these circumstances. If she is struggling I would try and lend a hand until she is back on her feet so she doesn't loose her pets. She may have been hinting at you for help.

If there is nothing else going on then yes she should absolutely rehome.

Probably should have agreed with her and said she would be doing the right thing, rather than tell her exactly what you were thinking.

You're right. It's cruel to keep birds locked in a cage and not allow them to fly.

Caged birds makes me very sad.

They should be free to fly, it's just not natural to cage them. Imagine being kept in a cage unable to walk.

I agree Birds are meant to fly .

You are not unreasonable to think the birds should be rehomed BUT this is a classic case of "it's not what you say, it's how you say it. "

You should probably have acknowledged how hard that would be for her, but probably for the best and then said something nice about the birds. It might all be piffle but you would have ended up with a friend "bravely" rehoming the birds and feeling good about it.

Why is there a question mark at the end of your post title?
You post isn't asking us if you should tell her, so no question mark required.

She didn’t like being told the truth, which reflects badly on her as a person. You did nothing wrong.

Keeping birds in cages is cruel even if they are "let out" to fly.

YANBU.

It's cruel to keep a bird caged all the time. You were not unreasonable in pointing out your feelings - perhaps it will encourage her to act and rehome them.

I had two budgies when I was a kid called sonny and Cher, lots of people had them back then, breaks my heart thinking about it now, can’t stand the idea of caged birds or fish in small tanks.

Don’t worry OP, people don’t like criticism, you could just have another chat to say that you hope you didn’t offend, that you were just agreeing with what was already said about re homing them with someone who is able to let them out a bit or who has a large aviary. We shouldn’t be worried really about offending anyone if they are keeping animals that might be suffering though, so maybe see this through.

Not unreasonable. We have birds, we’ve had them 4 years and they have never spent a whole day in their cage. They are out 90% of the day to fly around the house. What’s the reason she’s not letting them out? They are hard work, like toddlers really so if she’s just fed up with them and lost interest it’s best to rehome.

Oh no the grammar police have jumped in again.

She shouldn't have brought it up if she didn't want you to comment.

Agree that she's being defensive because she knows you're right.

I’d have said the same, OP, I think keeping birds in cages is awful.

Evenin' all
( you probably need to be over 60 too get that reference!)

How big is the cage? I have rescue budgies who don’t come out because they are so scared of everything, but they have a massive indoor aviary. It’s not necessarily cruel.

Is there a reason she hasn’t let them out? Is she struggling with the dust?

Thinking about it I don't think I have seen a caged bird since the 70s when my aunt had a budgie . Remember pet shops selling parakeets too. Seems so awful now . The only ones I even know about are the large cocktatoos that seem to be free around the house. Completely off track are uncaged birds just peeing and pooing everywhere ?.
Ignore your friend , you were both drinking wine.

Caged birds are awful. DD looks after a Budgie for a friend sometimes and she flies free the whole time (Dd has a net on her door just in case) and only goes in the cage at night and thats by choice.
I wouldn't have a caged bird in my house, its totally wrong