Feel disgusted

[Hello113]

I've just been sent a cute video of my neice and I that was taken without me knowing. It's a lovely moment between us and I wish that's all I could focus on but I look like a huge fat ugly mess and I feel so embarrassed that this is how I actually look to other people. I've struggled with my weight for the last 10 years or so and I'm now a size 16 (I dont think theres anything wrong with people being this size btw) I weighed about 15.5 stone when I was weighed myself but feel it's more now, too scared to weigh myself. My work uniform is very tight. Work trousers no longer do up. In this video I've got a massive fat face with a double chin and I just look horrific. Before christmas I'm seeing several people I haven't seen in a long time and I feel like cancelling. I need an outfit for work Xmas do but now I feel like not going.
I've done slimming world before, lost weight but put some of it back on. I'm an emotional eater which is my biggest problem.
I'm not sure why I'm posting really, just feel so sad and so embarrassed.

Cut out all carbs and do intermittent fasting.
You will soon see and feel the difference.
You can do this!

Try stopping buying ultra processed foods ( crisps biscuits cake,) and snacks on nuts bananas and toast. will help you feel better

I'm sorry you feel like this. I've just started a free version of Second Nature from my GP. I'm a similar size to you.

It's a 12 week programme that helps look at your food but also the reasons why you eat.

Maybe ask your surgery for help?

I watched a thing on youtube yesterday, think it was called the Food Freedom Coach, a guy who was explaining why "diets" don't work long term and how to lose weight sustainably. It was very interesting. I'd suggest giving that a watch and attempt to lose weight very slowly. Up your exercise, cut down on all the stuff you know isn't good for you and be kind to yourself. I wouldn't try to lose a lot of weight for the Xmas do or for when you meet up with the people you haven't seen for a while. Buy yourself something new to wear, do your hair and make up nice and enjoy yourself. If other people notice you have put weight on so what? The thought might flit through their mind but they're not going to dwell on it. Anyone that loves you is going to enjoy your company, just as your niece was. Once you start eating healthier and exercising it will improve your mood and make you feel better about yourself. You're not a huge fat ugly mess, you are just someone who has put on a bit of weight and can lose it again.

Thank you, I've not heard of this but just looked at it. I did the quiz and it has recommended monjaro. I just worry about the side effects and sustaining any weight loss once you stop the injections.

Aw, I'm so sorry. It's awful that you feel this way. Sometimes we have those moments when we see ourselves in a light we didn't want to. That can be the moment when we decide that enough is enough. With emotional eating, tackling the cause is almost as important as what you eat. Have you thought about seeing your GP for support?

OP, cherish that video. You’ll look back on it in 10-20 years time and all you’ll see is how young you were and how gorgeous, a few pounds aside. Take your time, make a plan, something sustainable, but don’t fret over a few images.

Have a look at the Mounjaro threads on here. Lots of discussion about side effects, maintenance etc. it can be a real boost to help you make all of the changes that pp are suggesting. There are doctor-led prescription services such as Doctor Online which cost a bit more but give you online appts with a GP before you start and to monitor.

Continuing Mounjaro... Part 23 www.mumsnet.com/Talk/weight-loss-injections/5202794-continuing-mounjaro-part-23

Firstly you are so much more than your outward appearance and weight. The video captures a lovely moment with your niece and that’s what matters.

Perhaps look at Noom. It helps you work out why you eat what you eat, and find other ways of rewarding yourself/coping. I lost 3 stone on it as we came out of the pandemic and have kept it off.

I think I will book a GP appointment. I don't know where to start with trying to lose it and make changes.

Best of luck, OP. It's not easy. Your GP might run some tests too, which will help to see if there are any medical issues you might be unaware of as well. Try not to worry as this is a normal part of the support they can offer.

Honestly, at least to some extent you can blame the camera. Video is very cruel to anyone with even a hint of an extra chin (and I have more than a hint) and certain angles are terribly unflattering. I bet that in real life your facial expressions and way of being are more noticeable than the rolls of fat.
Still not a bad idea to lose a bit of weight if you can, obvs. As I should. Maybe I'll join you.

Thank you. I definitely need to lose weight. I feel so uncomfortable. It's just knowing where to start. I've been looking at weight loss injections but worry about side effects.

I would worry about them too.
I've always found the best way is to start by eating quite generous portions of healthy food that I enjoy - eg, a vegetable risotto made with not too much fat, or organic chicken with roasted veg, a lovely salad - and have fruit instead of puds until I'm used to a healthier way of eating, then cut down a bit if necessary. Usually I start losing weight as soon as I ditch the junk. And have a thirty minute walk and few stretches every day.

Do you have a guide for this that I can follow? I can't shift my middle :(

The best place to start is by recording everything you eat. Everything. Including drinks.

Nutracheck gives you a free trial for a week that will help, it logs the calories for you. You need to be honest with yourself though. It won't help if you are pretending you're not snacking when you know you have been.

You will see where your biggest issues are and that will give you the first steps to improve. Whether it's to start with eating less carbs, more fruit and veg, smaller portions or choosing healthier snacks - start with the one you think will either benefit you most or that you can manage best.

Most importantly don't beat yourself up and set realistic and achievable goals.

Lower ab workouts or core strengthening exercises might be more beneficial. Zumba or Hip Hop dancing is much more fun though.

OP don’t worry too much - cameras have settings which can distort how people look. Also, you will be focussed on your size when you watch it, whereas anyone else will be enjoying the lovely interaction between you and your niece. The things you are seeing are not necessarily being seen by others! Definitely see your friends and have a nice time.

However, it does sound like you are in some unhealthy habits, and you would feel better working on your health. That is great! Most people are in that camp to some extent. Learning to make prioritising your health a daily ritual is a good place to be.

The great thing about weightloss is that it can be done - you can start any time, and you can succeed at it.

I would suggest focussing on re-prioritising your health.
What regular exercise do you do?
Tackle your emotional eating. Food is for fuel, not comfort. Try exercising instead of overeating when you need a dopamine boost.
And be kind to yourself!!

Just another vote for Mounjaro

In most cases there is no 'why'
There are no underlying 'issues'

Food is nice and UPFs means to many that we just can't stop. End of story.

Mounjaro is the miracle drug and well worth looking into. Lots to read on the weight loss injection section. For me, it's cost neutral: I was buying some meal deal at work plus having a weekend takeaway. Now I spend so little on food. I'm so glad I stumbled across the Mumsnet discussions on it when I did as that's what prompted me to start. And like most people on this, it's life altering.

And no, I don't get commission lol

Maybe this video was a blessing in disguise’s,I’m sure you don’t look as horrific as you feel but for your general health and mental health losing weight sounds like a great goal.
Honestly even just cutting the crap/snacks out of your diet makes a huge difference, alcohol mixers tend to have lots of calories.l too

I attended a training course focusing on fasting recently which is suppose to be very beneficial

Another Mounjaro convert here. Absolute game changer and cost neutral for me too. Happy to pay for it for the long term but I do plan to contact a nutritional counsellor or some such person to find out the root cause of being overweight my entire adult life.

Another vote for Mounjaro here. Started off with 15.5 st in May and steadily and healthily lost weight, now 12 stones my target is 10st. I am also peri menopausal and used to have hrt treatment with rhe start of Mounjaro journey I stopped hrt gels too and all my symptoms disappeared, I can now walk my dog longer distances without being breathless/ honestly best money I have spent on myself ever

i had a similar thing OP - saw pictures of myself on holiday - literally having a mud bath and thought I looked like a Blummin hippopotamus in the mud - that was it for me I knew I had to do something to reverse the weight gain. I didn’t “diet” as such - just counted calories on nutracheck app to aim for calorie deficit. Didn’t stick rigidly (however weeks where I was more relaxed I tended to maintain rather than lose)- anyway averaged a pound to half a pound a week and I’m now a stone and a half lighter - I’ve still got a stone to go which I again will do gradually but my gosh I feel so much better about my body and I’m back to a healthy bmi. Don’t rush it - small steps and changes to food habits will work - it’s just a case of sticking with it and not being disheartened about the odd day where you do eat too much - as long as it gradually comes off it doesn’t matter.